His First Time
Most men are naturally a bit afraid of their first time having sexual intercourse. Will I enjoy it? Will I satisfy her? Is she the right one? Will I be able to get it up? These are all questions that many men think about before their first time. The truth is that your first few times having sex may not be remembered as your best sex ever. Most men agree that the first time is often fast and very clumsy.
Being Ready
The first thing to consider is the person you are with. You want your first time to be with someone you really care for and that really cares for you in return. Since sex will most likely be not that great the first few times, the person you are with is what you’ll want to remember. Many men often rush into sex before they are ready because their friends are doing it and they are ashamed of being virgins. This should not be your reason, there is no correct amount of time to wait; you just want to make sure that you will not regret the decision later.
A few questions you can ask yourself are: Do I trust my partner with my life? Can I see myself having a long relationship with this person? Is she or anyone else pressuring me? Is having sex for me, or for someone else?
Although everyone has anxieties, if you don’t feel you are completely ready, wait. If the gal you are with really cares for you enough, she will understand that this is a big decision, and you don’t want to rush it.
Tips
Choose a place where you feel safe and comfortable, your bedroom may be the best place.
Choose a secure time when roommates / parents / friends won't come barging in.
Gain some experience ahead of time. You want to have explored foreplay for quite awhile before you take the plunge. Having a good understanding of how both your bodies work, as well as having played together, will take away much of the tension. Make sure that you feel 100% comfortable in the nude with the lights on, as having sex will be much more intimate then looking at each other.
Communication is the most important thing in a sexual relationship. Make sure to talk about doing it ahead of time to make sure that you are both thinking the same thing. Getting the topic out in the open allows you to become more comfortable with it.
Feel free to say stop when ever you want, whether you haven’t started, are starting, or are well under way. It may be because you are getting cold feet, or something about the situation feels wrong, the reason can be whatever you want, just make sure the person you are with will respect your wishes.
If you have erection difficulties, or ejaculate prematurely - something that often happens the first few times - stay positive. Don’t stress it, since stressing it will only cause it to happen again and again. Try to relax. If your erection comes back, it does, and if it doesn’t, it doesn’t. You can try later that day, the next day, next week, or whenever you want, so don’t get yourself down. If you have chosen a good partner, she will understand this and try to help you out with some manual or oral stimulation.
Just like men sometimes have erection problems from anxiety, women may have trouble getting wet (known as Excessive Dryness). Be patient and do everything that you would expect her to do if you had the male version of the problem. The problem can be solved to some degree using a water-based lubricant like K-Y Jelly. You can find it and many other lubricants in our online store.
Be sure you are both open enough to talk about the experience afterwards, even if not right away. Whether it was as hot as a Spanish soap opera, or as embarrassing as a skit from American Pie, be sure to talk about it. If you can’t talk afterwards, then you are simply not ready to move to this level. Communication is the key!
The most important thing you need to know is to enjoy safe sex by using protection. Whether it be to protect your partner from pregnancy, or to prevent contracting STDs, you want to protect yourself to the fullest extent. Until you have been with your partner to get checked for STDs, and you are on other birth control, there is no excuse for not using protection. Although condoms may not always be that pleasant, they are much better then contracting something like genital warts. You can buy condoms at most pharmacies, or order them online from our online store.
We shouldn’t have to say this, but we will mention it anyway. Do not go bragging to others about what happened. Sex is something you share with your partner, and there will usually be privacy expectations. It can be a major event in your life, one that you’d love to share with a friend or two, but find out what your partner’s wishes are first, and respect them.
Remember, this experience should be an extremely special and intimate time for both partners. Good luck, and remember that the best sex happens with people you care greatly about.
I NEED HELP OR ADVICE!! lol
alright ppl here is the situation. I am 19 and a virgin, but i am not a virgin by choice. I have had plenty of times to lose my V-card but I have choosen not to carry out the deed (so to say). I had the chance to lose my V-card when i was around 13 but never did, cause back then I was "shy" about my body but now i'm perfectly comfortable with it. After talking to other ppl (ex gf's included) I figured that i wanted to lose my Virginity a different way and the solution i can up with was, by losing it in a 3-way. Now could this actually work out? or Should i just suck it up and lose it in the normal way? I've been talking to this new girl and she always makes me happy when i hang with her, but i have no clue if she likes me at all. So any advice?? lol thanks have a great day.
Hi, me and this girl im with
Hi, me and this girl im with havent been together long. every since we got together we have been talking about having sex. im 19 and shes 18. it will be my first time having sex. but she has had a few sexual patners in the past. what can i do to make it specal and last long? also when it comes down to it what isthe best position to start off at the begining ?.
Plese can someone help :)
Thanks
hmm
im 15 and shit with my girl has been getting serious lately. We both openly talk about sex so im comfortable with talking to her about it. I am a little nervous though because we are going to have sex in 2 weeks. what can i do to prepare for this? and how can i make myself more memorable for her?
Question that needs a answer
I'm 16 and i do everything sports lifting running and hanging with friends but for past 5 years i have thought of sex all the time and i really could use an answer on how to get my mind of it so much. its an everyday thing ill sit in class and it pops in my head or ill be sitting with friends even family and pops in my head. i really just need a way to get away from thinking about it all the time. so if anyone could please help i would greatly be thankful to you if could answer this for me.
welcome to manhood!
Firstly, There's nothing wrong with thinking about sex alot or even all the time. I'm 28 and I still think about sex all of the time! but since you're still growing and going through adolescence your hormones are still unbalanced and going haywire. Unless it starts affect you're school work or social life (dropping grades/unable to stand up on cue!) I'd sit back and enjoy the thoughts. they'll even out eventually.
I'm a 23 year old student
I'm a 23 year old student living in Montreal and I'm still a virgin. Montreal! How sad is that?! What should I do?
i maybe not person to
i maybe not person to understand your point very well but sex is one thing should wait for till you yourself know your ready i have thought about sex for years and have wanted to do it but if you wait for the right moment then you'll know your happy with yourself sex is a rough subject but the moment you jump on it and your not ready and the girl of your dreams come along then you know might regret it in the long run wishing you lost your virginity to her instead of the other women first did it with.... i know im 16 but from my point of view i think that would be best for you.... but do as you please with your life
im 15 and im a virgin, but
im 15 and im a virgin, but lately ive ben thinkin about about this alot, imean, i kinda want to stay a virgin till im married, but havin sex sonner also sounds fun, and advice?
The first time
you are too young for sex, but if you must then you must. i hope you take my advice; im a psychoanalysis in the study of sexual relations. Sex for some ppl is to past time while some ppl its a way to connect with the one you love. i lost mine at age 18 so there is no rush and dont fall into peer pressure. You may not feel comfortable with having sex but if you wish to explore your sexual desires, there are other ways into doing so. Fellatio, Mutual Masturbation, and Anal Play are all good ways to test yourself. also be sure that the other you wish to do these with are consenting and dont let him/her buckle down to any peer pressure you may entice upon them
reply
hey man . . . honestly you shouldn't feel like losing your virginity, or sex as you would say, to be "fun" but in fact it should be a great experience for you and the person you lose it to. I mean sure it probably would be fun to just do it but that is not what it is supose to be like, just simply wait and see what happens with your next girlfriend or something and trust me you will find the "perfect" one for you
scared
my question is this guys, im a 17 year old guy who's still a virgin and my gf, who's the same age, came to me the other day and told me she wanted to have sex (she's a virgin as well) i dont know wether to be affriad or excited? and what position would be best to start out on??
cheers =]
i see
honestly man you should feel a little bit of both, i mean if you know you truely love her and everything and you feel that she has deserved the "right" to take your V-card, then by all means go for it. but make sure that you two have been going out for a while and not just like two weeks or something. and if you must know, a good position to lose your V-card to would basically be the Missionary position.
cheers
i do feel as if she deserves my so called 'V-card'. I understand what you mean b y not jus like two weeks as well like =] cz u want to be able to trust each other =] which takes time...
Thanks for the position info as well =] but why is this such a good position?
its all in the position
when you first have sex, for the female it will be discomforting depending on the size of the phallus. you will be breaking through a small layer of skin inside of her and you may or may not experience bleeding. missionary style usualy elevates her in a certain position were it be a little bit more comfortable for her. also women tend to value their virginity more so than men so make sure she is willing in what you to want to do
worried
hi im 22 and still a virgin, i don't have a gf, so maybe that is the problem, i think. another thing is that im overweight im sure that is the main problem, does anyone have any advise for me?
wrong approach
you probably try the same approach with every girl but the truth is they're all different. so try to figure out her type and act accordingly(what you see, not wat she says, women are misleading)
his 1st time
my bf is a virgin but i on the other hand have had lots of experience... i feel weird about taking his virginity because i want his 1st time to live up to his dreams... any tips on how to make him feel special and lot like the other guys i've screwed?
Hi
If you going to have sex with your bf and it's his first time, just go slow and and easy. Keep it simple as well and help him get into the mood (handjob/blowjob, allowing him to explore your body etc.) before starting intercourse. Hope this helps
Don't worry. When I was a
Don't worry. When I was a junior in college I had a crush on a very cute freshman who was a virgin. One night I had him alone with me and initiated sex with him. He was a nervous wreck but I saw this as a teaching moment. I got him to relax as we slowly undressed each other. He was well endowed and I looked forward to some enjoyable sex. I instructed him in foreplay and in what I liked, to include cunnilingus. He eagerly followed my instructions and loosened up completely, but in his excitement when I began to give him head, he came in my mouth in probably a minute. After swallowing all his juices, I reassured him and I kept giving him head which kept him hard. I then began intercourse from on top and we had wonderful sex. He recovered quickly and we ended up making love three times that evening. He was totally grateful and he couldn't get enough of me. I'm sure I made his first time a lifelong memory. Communication is the way to go and remember when you give a little, you can get a lot more in return.
date
ive never had a gf but i have many girls that r friends and r HOT & they offered sex to me because im a virgin im 17 but i tell them no because i want to have sex w/ sum i rly love. but did i fuk up by not takeing the offers?
hey
nah u didnt fuck up. TRUST me if u do take the offer you'll regret it later. at least wait till u go out with someone!
the BIG problem
my girlfriend and I have and issue, were both 17 and sexually curious, we have had oral sex before and now she wants to have sex. I have a big issue though, i am circumsized, a virgin, but besides that im still 11 1/2- 12 inches long and im afraid to hurt her. Is that normal for someone my age and can i hurt my girlfriend if we have sex?
As long as you are both
As long as you are both comfortable, you should be fine. However, if it is the first time for both of you, it is possible that it could hurt her the first time that you have intercourse. So, you should make sure that you take it slow and easy, and make sure that she is fully comfortable with what you are doing. Forplay is very good for your first time. It can help the other person become more comfortable. If you have to, use some kind of lubricant to help reduce dryness, as this can become very uncomfortable for her. Also, be sure to practice some form of safe sex, especially since it is your first time. Don't be afraid to communicate your feelings about having sex to her. Chances are, she could really be as unsure as you are.
Curiousity
Okay I'm 20, my boyfriend is 25. We've been together for over a year and just mostly fooled around foreplay kinda stuff and such, because we're both a bit uncomfortable with the idea of actually having sex. I've been with a two guys(once with each of), but I'm still quite stand-offish about it(bad experiences with them), he's kinda a virgin(He's penetrated a girl but never actually fully went in or anything, so kinda). I'm just wondering if anyone has any tips because the reason the time he was with the other girl didn't work out is because he's not circumcised and over 10 inches and the girl wasn't exactly nice about that. I'm wondering if there is ANY way I can help lessen that for him, other than the normal being gentle with him for a while, because I don't want to hurt him in anyway when we have sex.
Alittle scared but wondering
Me and my boyfriend have been together since Valintines day(That's when we first got together) and I was wondering any good tips before our first time. He's still a virgin and so am I so that's a good thing. What I'm mainly worried about is that I won't be pleasurable enough. Sure I sould be putting this in her first time but I wanna know from a guys point of veiw.
Men: What do you think a women should do first when it's both our first times?
I really need some tips D:
Help!
I'm 16 and there's this girl that i really have deep feelings for. We have both talked about sex with each other and we both want to do it but she is 18 and doesnt want to get in trouble for having sex with a minor. But i really care for her and i really want to have sex with her. Should i just forget about it? Help!
Well since you are 16 you
Well since you are 16 you don't have to worry about the underage part but if both you and her are ready then you should take your time and just have fun with it. But remeber you only get one time.
Foreplay Tips For Guys
Tip #1... One of the biggest mistakes men make is getting carried away. What you believe is great and makes you excited would possibly not be doing the same for her.
Tip #2... Talk with your partner about what it is that gets her excited during foreplay. Chatting about this and then giving her what she wants makes good sense does it not.
Tip #3... Never say that what a former squeeze liked is standard for all girls. It is not. This is another huge mistake which if not corrected by discourse can shortly have you out on the outer and a talking point among her chums.
Tip #4... There are certain areas of a woman's body that are highly sensitive. Nipples are one of them so being coarse and squeezing and twisting them is not such a good idea unless that's what she wants. An enormous turn off can be when you're into the foreplay and suddenly you need to take five because she must deal with the pain. So keep coarse to a minimum.
Tip #5... Guys, never suggest you switch off the lights. Why? Because many girls are very acutely aware of their bodies and can take things the wrong way. As an example, asking for the lights to be switched off could mean'I don't want to see your body in all it's glory.' Bad idea and another turn off during foreplay.
Tip #6... If she is a curvy type hold back on the compliments. Again it gets back to body image and while she may not be the girl you see on the front page of magazines, over complimenting her will come across as fake and she'll know you are not being honest. One thing you might do is keep it simple and just let her know you adore curvy girls.
Tip #7... Another of the foreplay for men tips is make sure you are clean. To paraphrase, cleanliness is a very important side of sex for ladies and if you're reeking from body odour then your intimacy will be short-lived or you may not get another audience with her.
I need help!!!
Me and my ex bf brokeup a while back, but we still mess around with each other. Over pass few days he fingered me and I sucked his dick. I'm not a hoe it's just that I love to please him. We both have never had sex but he told me he wants me to be his 1st. And I want him to be mines. I need to no how can we ever be alone and were can we "complete the mission" in peace!!! Please help
Ps we're in highschool
He's 15 and a freshmen
And I'm 16 and a sopomore
same problem
me nd my ex r tinkin of havin sex wel im 13 she bout be 14 bt anyways iv fingerd her shes rubbd me nd we dnt kno wen nd wer is right! WHAT SHOULD I DO?