Female Orgasm
Before You Get Started
Some women seem to have an incredibly difficult time reaching orgasm during intercourse; that is if they are able to orgasm at all. The most common reason for this is that they don’t know their own bodies. Society has had this brilliant effect of instilling into our minds from childhood that masturbation is sinful, wrong and dirty. Well, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion, but all common sense dictates that this couldn’t be farther from the truth.
Thanks to this misconception, many people, especially women, have stopped themselves from learning their bodies, thereby reducing the chances of being able to fully enjoy sex. It is hard for many women to unlearn all that they have been taught, and they often feel that “touching themselves does not bring pleasure”. There is some truth behind that - they are not lying, they do not feel pleasure. However, this is not because there is no pleasure to be felt, just that they have been indirectly taught to not enjoy it. Getting beyond this will take time and patience, so never rush your partner.
If your woman has never had an orgasm (this is often the case if they say, "I think I’ve had one"), you will want to refer to the Female Masturbation Guide to get things started. Learning to please a woman who can’t orgasm on her own is extremely difficult, so we highly suggest that you start with getting her to play with herself, and allow her to learn how her body reacts to different stimulus.
The last note has to do with your approach. Orgasms can’t be forced, and the more pressure you put on her to cum, the less likely it is to happen. Take things slow, learn techniques, experiment with them and find what works. If you start getting frustrated when you aren’t seeing results, it will show, and unfortunately make it even harder. Sex is supposed to be fun and enjoyable - as soon as you make it too serious, it takes away from the pleasure!
About Orgasms
There are two major types of orgasms a women can have - clitoral and G-spot (otherwise known as vaginal orgasms). When masturbating, women usually learn to get themselves off using their clitoris. There is nothing wrong with that, but it leaves the whole world of vaginal orgasms untapped. Many women are unable to climax during intercourse, as they aren't familiar enough with the stimulation to enjoy it to its fullest extent. While you learn to read your partner's body signs, it never hurts to ask a question, especially if you are trying new techniques.
Coitus, commonly known as vaginal sex, can be one of the clumsiest ways to stimulate a woman, if done without thought. While it does provide an atmosphere that can be highly arousing, emotionally satisfying and erotic, the degree of stimulation to the woman's clitoral area is nothing compared to masturbation or cunnilingus. One can incorporate manual stimulation to the clitoris during sex, but this is not very necessary if your woman has had vaginal orgasms in the past, and if you know how to hit the g spot correctly. To learn more about positions and the G-spot, please refer to the G-spot article and Sex Positions section. No one wants to involve geometry into sex, but it is wise to know which positions stimulate the G spot the best. In order to help her achieve a vaginal orgasm, you need to make sure you are "hitting" the G-spot with each stroke.
Many men fantasize about the myth of female ejaculation. Well, for starters, its no myth, most women should theoretically be able to have them. The key is G-spot stimulation, but all of this is also well described in the article on Female Ejaculation.
Some Ideas on Getting Her There:
First of, we would like to remind you to relax, and not to make her orgasm the purpose behind the encounter. The more of a goal you make it; the less likely it is that it will happen. Relax and enjoy yourselves, as that is the most important part.
The Grind
During Intercourse, you want to increase the pressure exerted on the woman's clitoris. This can be accomplished by rotating your hips just like when you are "grinding" on a dance floor. Try to really push against the front of her groin with the area just above the penis. Rocking back and forth or side to side is a really good way of getting started.
Rule of Thumb
With the woman sitting on top, the man should lie flat on his back, pelvic tilted upward, and stomach muscles tightened. You want to arch your hips upwards to improve the quality of “the Grind”; this can be achieved easily by putting a pillow under the man’s bum. He then should put his hand over the woman’s pubic region, and place his thumb on the woman’s clitoris. While the woman is riding her partner, he can simultaneously stimulate her clitoris.
T Position
With the woman lying on her back, the man should lie perpendicularly (i.e., at a right angle to her, thus forming the ‘T’), while straddling the woman’s far leg. Depending on the woman’s flexibility, this can be a great position for deep penetration, while exposing the clitoris for manual stimulation. This double stimulation is very gratifying and can often lead to the big “O” really quickly.
The Maximizer
The woman lies on her back, legs tightly held together. The man lies on top, or stands/kneels, in front. Instead of being directly in line with her, the man should be at a slight diagonal. Both of her legs should be over one shoulder, or on one side, of his body; he should begin penetration. This position is designed to maximize female clitoral stimulation and is easiest to perform with the man standing or kneeling (i.e. the woman should have her legs hanging off a counter, couch or bed).
Using Sex Toys
Sex toys can be used in virtually any sexual position, and thanks to the creative people who design toys, if you can think of a toy, chances are its already made. If you have never used one, you can read our comprehensive section on buying and using Sex Toys. Then visit our online store to find products designed to increase stimulation during intercourse or masturbation. The following is a summary of some of the most popular types of toys:
Vibrating Clitoral Suckers
This class of products works as follows: put the cup part of the toy over the clitoral area, squeeze the pump a couple times to build up some suction, then turn on the vibrating egg, which is generally attached to the cup. The suction is great because it draws more blood to the clitoris, making it more sensitive, as well as it keeps the toy hands free. It can be used during intercourse to add incredible sensations, but some varieties may prove a little bulky for some positions.
Regular Vibrators
For those of you who are looking for something with a little more functionality, we recommend getting a regular vibrator. The can be held in place during intercourse to stimulate whatever you want, they can be inserted anally, and can be used on their own as well. They are available in a wide variety of shapes, sizes, and purposes.
Vibrating Cock Rings
This class of products is ingenious! The toy is basically a ring with one or more vibrating eggs attached. Simply slide it down the shaft of the penis, turn on the vibrating eggs, and voila, super pleasure for both parties.
Play O (UTOPIA) Orgasmic Gel by Durex
Try Play O ... it is an unscented gel to be applied to the cllitoris and surrounding area. It uses a combination of ingredients designed to stimulate, increase desire and bring intense orgasms. We rated it a 8.5/10! Click here to check out our detailed review.
I can't reach to orgasm never
Since I were child I use the Masturbation , that mean from 7 or 8 years old . I feel I had a hight sexual emotion ..
when I use to have sex I didn't able to have orgasm with sex . my boyfriend try many time and many position but i can't reach to it .
I'm now 31 and want to doing with my fingure or above my boyfriend leg...
please help to me to reach to orgasm by sex.
Thank you
Sandra
the best
the best position me and my girlfriend do for her to get orgasms quick, would have to be the drill,
it stimulates the g spot, and i can play with her clit at the same time,
feels great for me too :]
Bless the world for Masterbation
I love masturbation..not sinful just all natural thing to do. this is my favorite substitute boyfriend, when my man is locked up in prison.
<3byrdy
i know how u feel!
i know how u feel!
pc contraction
hi!
i want to ask someting. it will help my research. when you masturbate or in intercorse, did you check your PC muscles? when your arosual level is increaseing do you feel some involuntary pc contraction? are they goes longer and stronger? and then a final spazm about a few secound before orgazm?
if you explain i can undersand easly.
thank you for you help.
i dont no if this is weird
i dont no if this is weird or if i should be very concerned about this but everytime i have a orgasm i have a anxiety attack and sometimes it get really bad last time my boyfriend and i had sex my anxiety got so bad it got to the point to i almost couldnt breathe. is it normal for some women to have anxiety when they have a orgasm?
Confussed
so my gspot doesnt really do anything is it that im not putting enough pressure on it
Ok this article says alot
Ok this article says alot about how its hard to get a girl to orgasm if she cant make herself orgasm. Personally I think that's a bit untrue, cuz yes I masturbate occasionally but I can NEVER get myself very aroused or even anywhere close to orgasm. BUT when my boyfriend fingers me, eats me out, plays w/ my breasts, w/e it feels immeasurably better and I actually get all shaky and my knees turn to jelly and I start panting. Granted, neither of us have never made eachother cum due to lack of time and privacy, but I get ALOT closer when it's him doing it instead of me.
Dry sex
Is it possible for my gf to orgasm during dry humping. She wants to wait until marriage to have penetrating sex. I can feel how wet she is everytime but how can I tell if she is getting close to climax?
I don't really
I don't really understand...I understand a little, but not really
???
was that to me or another comment?
how wud u really kno if ur
how wud u really kno if ur havin an orgasm.... coming from a girl
umm becus i touch and finger myself on a daily basis i never get the BOOm BAng POW feeling i jus get wetter.... it feels good but idk nuthin ever happens...... i think that ive never had one... one becus idk i hav to sneak around and touch myself becus im still living at home and idk i think it wud be better if im able to explore my own body and find my own spots...
So what am i doing wrong????????????
i do have the same feeling wen i have sex as wen i masterbate
i'm 18 n female i jus dnt understand it yes i enjoy sex n i think i orgasm but at the same time i dnt as i get such a head rush on my own but wen i'm doing it with my bf it's jus not the same rush what can i try n do to help ?
advise try it
u need to fore play and the G spot activated
ftnger ruself to identify
and u cud guide him sexy
u will reeally pour a lot and ohhh my - ur whole body will feel the VIBS
luv to share sex thgts
andy
foru3961@yahoo.com
I can´t get my gf to cum!
Okej, I´m 17 and i have a gf that´s 17 to. We have been together for 6 moth and having sex for like 5 or somthing.
But i just can´t get her to cum. Both of us lost the virginity to each other. I think that the problem is that she it thinking of cuming to much, and that it takes to long for her to cum and then she want´s me to stop because she don´t want me to be "trubbeld" any more, But i want to keep on going. we have tried both clitorial and vaginal. I just don´t know how to get her relaxed and let me take my time. i tryed to speak to her, but she keeps doing the same thing!
Please help! =(
I want to be able to make her cum.
/sorry for my bad English! :P
MR MAN
5 months?? Maybe u just aint doing it right, ur foreplay has to be in a certain rythum, u have to have a game plan, n i thnk u be too much nto haing fun n ur own satisfaction tht u totaly foget about her, i make any lady cum if i concentrate on her, tactic ma brada, tactic... everything counts, the way u stare, voice tone, speed, timing, breathing, so get ur act st8, coz im sure if ur gal were 2 get in2 da hands of sum1 tht makes her cum, she sure wont have a reason to stay wit u no mre
Sounds like you need SUPER FOREPLAY
Honestly dude to me its just sounds like your foreplay... aint up to play... Foreplay is one of the best ways i reckon to get her A.. More comfortable and willing B... gets her ready for penetration without the need of lube C... its just so fun to watch as she twists and turns and moans while you tease her... So be a football player and LEARN TA PLAYZ!!!!
I can't cum!
I've been with my bf almost a year now. We started having sex almost half a year ago. He's been tryin really hard to make me cum, I feel like he's the closest when he goes really fast when im sitting on him. But this jus usually leads to his cumin. I'm going to try a couple more things..but hopefully I can come!
my boyfriend is amazing in
my boyfriend is amazing in bed, like really amazing but i always seem to hold back from orgasm.
i'm not sure why, but from now on i'm just going to go for it.
I'm 14, South Carliona and confused...
I dont really know what to do here. I'm not a virgin, and I know what makes me feel good. The thing is, I can never have a orgasm. The problem is, I cum watching a porn or people kissing on my neck; I'm really easy to get turned on. I never cum while I'm having sex, and I dont know why. I have almost no feeling in my clit from something I'v done in the past... but thats not the point. The point is I'm wanting to know how to have a orgasm... Even when I do cum, I never feel it... And I've been worried about it. So if u have anything at all to help me... Message me at marloweruby@ymail.com
well, i never really know if
well, i never really know if i came or not....because i cannot feel it either....i cannot make myself orgasm, and only so far when i am on top during sex...
Cant Orgasm!!!!!!
Ok i have the hardest time enjoying sex at all. I cant use condoms or any kinds of lube It burns and Numbs me completly where i cant feel anything at all. I can Orgasm if I masterbate But My boyfriend cant get me off for nothing, also i have a hard time feeling that he's inside me and he is Most Deff not small at all His penis is almost longer then my face if that says anything. So we always have to use spit for Lube and No comdoms or ill get Extreamly dry and burning will start. he's tryed fingering that doesnt help nor does useing his toung I dont understand why i wont Orgasm. It's like i Have no feeling at all down there. I sometimes wonder and heard u can loose feeling from To much trama and Vibaration to your vagina which I ride horses 24/7 i dont know if thats true or not. so Pretty much my problem is I cant feel anything down there, and Lubes and Condoms cant be used. and everything we have tryed hasent worked.
It really makes my boyfriend feel bad sence he always gets the pleasure
Please help
Allergies maybe?
I have a kinda similar issue cept I can feel it at the very beginning of sex then my body goes entirely numb and sore condoms make my vulva itch so I can't use them either. I think my problem is partially from the fact that I have a very slight frame especially for my heighth and he has a large frame and well endowed Idk but it sounds like you may have been riding horses to much and perhaps you are allergic to lube I am but I am 16 so I just suffer the swelling and burning becuz my man doesnt want a kid.
Or it could be he has the
Or it could be he has the perfect gift from god but lacks the instruction manual.... he might not be able to use himself in a way which effects you... Hmmm a toughy... looking for a doc is probably the smartest idea... but if he/she cant find anything wrong... i'd suggest you maybe you take it easy on the horse riding and see what happens... if al else fails... there are toyz...
well to tell you the truth i
well to tell you the truth i really cant feel my man inside of me either. i feel the pressure sometimes, i cannot feel when he comes inside me and that upsets me.....but it seems i have the opposite problem as you, i can only orgasm when we are having intercourse. and only so far when i am on top, i have only ever been able to get my self to o one time. and never with oral stimulation...any suggestions for me? i also ride horses.....so maybe we have a something in common...
Honestly, with such large
Honestly, with such large issues I suggest talking to a doctor.
She or he will possibly be able to track down a reason and help out.
For those of you women who have never had an orgasm
I came across a neat little trick a few months ago, i have been with my girlfriend for about 5 months now and just used this technique on her last night because I completey forgot about it. And i'll tell ya, this technique is going to be loved by all you couples if your girlfriend/wife has a hardtime reaching an orgasm. My girlfriend finds it hard, and i gave her 7 orgasms in under 2 minutes. Sounds impossible doesnt it? Heres what you do, first raise your right hand palm facing you, then push your middle finger and the finger to its left toward you. Use that hand position to insert into your girlfriends vagina,with the pinky and index finger below her vagina and the two middle ones inside her. The next thing you want to do is to use your left hand, press down on her pelvis, and then use the hand with your fingers inside her to move up and down, not in and out, but up and down. This is a massage technique that stimulates here pressure point a.k.a g-spot. within 20 seconds she should have an orgasm no problem. If you do these steps correctly on your female partner, making her have an orgasm will be not only a walk in the park, but you will mostl definitely have to change the sheets after your done with her. Hope this tip has helped and will help all you couples out there. Enjoy :)
reaching paradise
well basicly my girlfriend and i have been toether for a year now, and we have been havin sex for quite some time. i have been trying to make her cum in every way possible i have stimulated her clitoricly, and massaged her G-spot aswell as eatting her out i know im doin it well since she moans and sticks my head down there and tells me to not stop. so the only problem is that after letz say 15-20 minutes of that a white substances comes out from her vagina and she tells me she feels like peeing or dat it tickles her so i havta stop since i she closes up on me. i have told her to relax and just to let herself go, but according to her da peeing sensation as well as da tickling sensation r too strong to e ignore, please if any1 can help me out i would be ever so thankful i just want my girl to enjoy sex as much as possible. with out havin those sensations.thank you.
Its just her feeling good why comlain?
it is most likly she has reached a point in her sexual experiance where she is VERY sensitive.. this can work two ways... one it feels so good for her and she will tightn up so it will also feel good for ya if your inside her cause damn... trust me... Or Two sh will become OVERly sensitve which in this case.. ya need to stop being so freaking good at what you do ...
My GF not able to have such pleasure
Hey all need if possible a help/guide on me and my gf with her pleasure.
first of all, i will mention that my gf cannot either cum or orgasm in any such way whether it would be solo or me giving g-spot (which cant find) and/or clitoral stimulation.
What happens is she will get to a point during oral stimulation that she will get to a point where it would "tickle too much" (becomes intensely over-sensitive) thus for stopping and not being able to continue oral pleasure, this same situation happens whilst using a vibrator aswell, plus it doesnt help that i am a premature ejaculature.
Any ways of helping?
Any help is much appreciated