I have been going out with my boyfriend for 19 months now, we had a long distance relationship for about 10 months, but have otherwise been making love pretty much the whole time. This boyfriend was my first time, and I come from a sheltered background so have had relatively little exposure to sex. He is a little more experienced than me, but regardless...he is very good in bed. Not that I have anything to compare it to...but I just know....
Anyway.... I feel a little inferior around him sometimes, because he does things in bed so well, but when I try and take control, there is a huge difference in quality. He says it still feels nice, and that I shouldn't worry, but I do. It makes a big difference for me too, because it is not really very stimulating for me when I am doing the moving. I know the positions, but it always feels more like a very gentile massage rather than anything invigorating or passionate.
What am I doing wrong? How can I learn to have a bigger effect? Is this a common problem?
He can move his pelvis much more quickly than me, so maybe that is a problem? I am not sure.....
I dunno what causes it, but I was like that before.
I mean, I had quite a bit of sexual experience but mostly with oral and foreplay...whereas my partner had been sort of a manwhore before me. :p First few times I was riding him, it hurt us both...but after a while I guess I got the good angle. He loves it now, I think its one of his favourites. Its good for me, but I can't come that way for the record, I usually do it as a treat for him.
Angles and motion. This stuff called sex requires learning and practice. And some positions just do not work for some couples.
The female superior can be very tiring and stressful for the woman if she tries too much up and down. Lean forward and develop a rocking motion. This can also be positioned so that the penis rubs directly across your clitoris.
The motion required on top is the same motion when riding a horse at the trot on an English saddle i.e. 'posting' at the trot. Up and forward then down and back, using your knees, on the bed either side of him, as your fulcrum. Use the bounce of the bedsprings to continue the motion - do not do all the work yourself, use the bed. He should actually move LESS than he would otherwise - his job is to balance and guide you not to propel you.
Practice makes perfect!
My girl was pretty bad at first, trying to only find a position that pleased me. Along the way we found some that drove her wild, causing her to spasm around me every time she passed the spot. As long as she rocks with my head on that spot, it's pretty good. Even if she loses track of it, it helps a ton that she's really into it, making me more turned on and easier to satisfy.
As for specific positioning...
cowgirl while leaning back and rocking
reverse cowgirl while leaning forward and bouncing up and down
the one on this site called asian cowgirl where she stays still and I thrust upwards, the guy can go really fast and hard in this position you like it that way
If the two of you have very good balance, you can really have fun on top of him with an exercise ball...but I must stress---very good balance needed. Also make sure there's nothing sharp/hard you can fall on if you slip up