Ok, so I have been getting real close with my ex from a long time ago. Now, for a very long time I have been thinking about taking our physical relationship farther than just making out and she thought so too. So I was over at her house today and we were kissing and we started to remove eachother's shirts and then pants so now we are both just in our undies. Well I'm turned on at this point, shes on top and straddling me, kissing my neck, ears, back, all my good sensitive spots. Well anyway, she goes down my shorts with her hand and starts lightly stroking my buddy down there. But the strange thing is, I didnt feel much, no rush of excitement nor of pleasure (mind you she had done this before once or twice a long time ago and it was great back then.) So, now im kinda like what the hell is going on, i should be enjoying this. Now, to make things worse, I feel myself begin to get soft again. Crap, new strategy.
So I flip her over and pin her down to the bed before she could realize what happened down there (i didnt want her feelings to be hurt) I start over again, just making out, kissing her sensitive areas now...and I get turned on again. Ok back in business. I move my way down her neck, I start kissing and nibbling her boobs a bit, down her stomach, towards her inner thighs and then to the crotch. Again, I start feeling a sense of apathy as I continue...i begin to finger her a little but while stimulating her breasts with my mouth/teeth/tongue. Shes sounding like shes having a great time, but here I am going soft again and only forcing myself to continue so she will have a good time. My mood is just dying where my excitement should have been skyrocketing.
So needless to say I go home pretty weak-spirited and angry at myself for who knows what. So what the hell? I've been thinking about doing that for a long time and it has always got my blood boiling, but then I get in there and do it and it felt like a job. Also frustrates me that I couldnt feel much when she was being so generous as to try to pleasure me. This is a girl I want to love and have a good relationship with. But, whats going on? Is something wrong?
The relationship was almost 2 years in length. It was pretty deep emotionally but we didn't get as far physcially. We were together for almost two years and never had sex. What ended the relationship was that I began to feel she wanted to get a little too serious towards the end. And we were both young and should be enjoying our lives and not have to deal with such commitments. I intended the break up to be a temporary thing from the start, more of just a "break." It lasted longer than I expected and quite a bit of unforseen problems hit the picture, including her going on a cruise to Europe and having sex with a guy she met there. Just a guess but perhaps I'm still put off by that? Another guess I would take is maybe I'm not capable of feeling for her the way I want to. Its a pity we cant choose who we love. Maybe I was simply nervous subconsciously, not having very much experience at all in that area. Who knows? I just created this thread to vent and to see if anyone wiser than me could share their insight.
she is your ex....there may be some emotions there that you havent brought up to yourself.
what caused you two to break up before? how long and how deep was the relationship?
you may just have some unsaid emotions that is interrfearing with you subconsioucly...im no doctor so dont take my words as the ultimatre truth. it may be something else.
i was just giving my opion from what i read.
Lass is on to something important. Maybe your penis knows something you do not.