Just came across the site and thought someone might be able to help me...
Me and my boyfriend have been together for a long time now, well around 2 years, the other night we were getting 'into it' everything was fine and perfect as usual, but he didnt and couldnt for some reason bone.. We tried some stuff to try 'wake it up' and nothing worked. I, as Im sure most girls would, got a bit fed up and was feeling less 'in the mood'. It took like an hour after teasing and stuff to get him to actually bone and by then I was really put off and we didn't end the night that well. I just wondered if it's common or if maybe somethings wrong or if anyone has any tips?
Hey,
Thanks for the replies. Yea I admit I think I didnt help the situation but no way was I trying to stress him out or come across as intimidating. He has never had any problems getting an erection before and he obviously was getting annoyed with himself that it wasnt working and I think that probablly made it worse. I was just a bit unsure of what to do I mean it has never happened before and he even had pre-cum and was definately turned on, so I thought maybe it was me but I guess thats just me getting paraniod as females do.. So I guess too that it was just a one thing? And if it happens again to just stop? Thanks again for all your help
And remember that a little sense of humor never hurts... when I saw the topic "What's up?"... Well, I couldn't help but think "We know what wasn't."
A "bone" (erection) is not a requirement for good, fufilling sex.
This falls in the same category of the guy who insists that the whole point of sex is "making her cum."
These are certainly not BAD things, but they are really not the point.
Sounds like maybe you were putting a lot of pressure on him and that never helps. If he's in the mind set that he HAS to get an erection that night then it's most likely not going to happen. My boyfriend seems to put more pressure on himself than I do. I'm always supportive of him and loving towards him and am always positive and we've never really had any problems. Maybe you just need to lay off him a bit and let him relax and just let things happen.
I agree with the above. Anything could have caused this. It could be just a one time thing. Except your attitude can determine a lot. If you are totally put off and give him a bad vibe about it, it will get into his psyche that he can't get an erection... and he won't be able to.
Al and Tessie are right on. There are many factors that can cause a guy not to become erect... stress, tiredness, medication. In the case of medication, it can be something as innocent as a sinus/allergy medication. Don't make this a big deal as stress will only increase the problem. It's just something that happens occasionally.
I agree with Alspals here. You need to not let him think your disappointed in him. Instead love and support him even more and let him know its no biggie cause it happens to every man at some point.
He should see a doctor though if it continues to be a problem.
Speeking as a guy, i think youneed to play this very quietly.
Erection problems can be a self fulfilling prophecy. And trust me, there is nothing worse than feeling like you are being monitored.
If he normally has no problems,don't make a big deal out of it. My ex did on the first occasion that i didn't get hard and she totally put me off sex for nearyl a month. At the end of the day, these things happen occasionally.
If he consistantly has a problem, then he needs to see a doctor. Hopefully he will do it without prompting.