Ok.. ive known this girl for about 4 years now... Through out these past 4 years, we have become really close... to the point where she tells me everything and i tell her everything then try to give advice to each other.
Basically im the classic best-friend guy in all the chick flicks you've seen who watches her make all the wrong moves and is there to comfort her.
We are very close and like to rest on each other and wut not and somewhat almost cuddle i guess?.. anyways ppl very often mistake us for bf and gf when we go out together and im just wondering what i should do...
She often compares me to her bfs saying how much better i treat her, and how well we get along..
However, then throws me off by saying things like my parents want me to go out with korean only boys (she is korean and i am american) and is close to other guys (she is very flirty, but means well). All of her bfs that ive seen her gone out with have all been korean... Should i just continue to be her best guy friend and have good intentions... or ask her how she feels and risk the relationship?
Hi guyinmovies,
Something you didn't mention.... Do you know the parents? Do they know you? If so, how do they view your friendship? Could it be that if they like you, then if their daughter falls for you, they'll just want her to be happy? Maybe you could spend some time getting to know the parents... and getting them to like you.
Just a random idea.
mjv154, i totally agree with you. IF i dont take the chance, ill be regretting it for the rest of my life. Hopefully with fate i will find a good time when things are just perfect to tell her..
oberon, exactly!... She told me it was just her mom telling her this, but her relationship to her mom is one that is very close. I think this is why she hasnt moved things any closer... it really sucks when race place an issue, because there is nothing i can do about it..
soulmates82.... eeep? heh... man, soo confused. I would really hate if we never talked again. We know each other soo well, sometimes its like we dont need words to talk.
Conclusion... wait a tad longer? heh
tough one. i had a real real real close guy friend once upon a time. hung out, talked, best of friends. one day he told me he wanted us to be more than just friends..... i was sooooooo flattered, so taken by surprise, so torn between having this guy as my friend for life or run the risk of loosing my very best friend should things not work out..... i was never friends with a guy after we broke up and just did not want to screw up the relationship we already had between us.
long story short - oh my gosh how i tried to get him to understand, cried and pleaded and begged him to understand that it was because i loved him too much to loose him. just a chance i could not take. too much to risk loosing.....
maybe if i'd have taken that chance we would still be together, who knows. i do know i lost my best friend that day cuz he walked out the door and never spoke to me again.
Depends on how seriously she takes the Korean boyfriend thing. If she wants to date only Korean guys, then I'm afraid you're out of luck. You might want to find out if she'd ever be open to dating outside her race. It may just be her parents who are enforcing this rule... heck, my parents would like for me to date women, but that ain't gonna happen...lol... Anyway, if she's open to the idea, you might, then, let her know that you'd like to expand the "friend" catagory. However, be ready for automatic parental disapproval.
It can be a real tuff spot; you like her, and want to remain her best friend, though you would like to possibly see if there is more there, only you don't want to jeperdize the friendship.
It sounds to me that you both basically feel the same way about each other. After 4 years you know her pretty well, and likewise she knows you. Some of the most solid relationships develop from good friendships; they have a very solid foundation.
It is fine to let things be, and hope that fate will interviene and help you out. I was never much for fate, so that means you need to make it happen yourself.
Tell her honestly how you feel, that you would like to take your friendship to the next level. Be open minded, and don't play it off as a joke, it must be sincear and honest.
It is a risk...but you don't get what you want out of life unless you are willing to take chances.