My gf and I have been together now for a year or so but it's only really the last few months we've started to get intimate.
I'm older, more sexually experienced (few partners tho), she younger, one other previous lover, not very experienced she admits.
The problems we have are it takes absolutley ages for her to get aroused ie wet and open. she feels aroused but no physical signs until after much kissing and stimulation from me. Obviously I don't mind becuase I love her but it does take a very long time 'to get the juices flowing'. And if there are any interruptions or she loses 'the moment' it's like back to square one - frustrating for both...
When she does get wet and I use my fingers, I find her cervix very small and tight, and no way could I ever attempt to enter her, it would hurt both of us, me because I am a bit senstive around the tip and like a nice easy entry. I feel little bumps around her cerivx, and indeed had a good look. I can see little bits of skin I can best describe as looking like polips or nodules. Could these be parts of her hymen?
She has had full intercourse with her previous partner but she tells me it was always extremely painful on entry but ok when it was in. She then had sex normally and felt no pain . She also tells me she has experienced very few orgasms and none with me. A bit pride-shattering but I'm sure we will get there!
She has seen a doc about it but everything checked out normally. I suspected vaginismus but I'm no doc, she has no history of abuse or feelings that sex is dirty so I don't know.
So we never have penetrative sex and to be honest I don't really care that much because we do everything else and I couldn't be happier for my own sexual release. But it's not just about me and we are both concerned about it. My main concern is for her. What I mean is I don't want to force entry and hurt her at all, even if it's for a means to an end.
She initiates sex regualry, (very reguarly!) so I'm sure she's not frigid or anything.
Hope thats enough info.