Okay, I'm sure there are topics for each of these, but I might as well as them at once...
Well, feel a bit odd asking this, actually...
I am a virgin. I am in a relationship and there is a good chance we will have intercourse at some time (we are planning to be achothers firsts), and I want to be good for her...
I was wondering if there were any tips you would give as far as how to please her (movements, tips for other forms of stimulation [or, 'fingering her']), minimizing the pain assosiated with the first time, control (in other words making sure I last the first time [hopefully being able to go past first ejaculation], and can keep from getting over-exited and going to fast or something), etc....
Also, what IS the average size of a man, and how much of a difference does size make?
Also, ehat form(s) of protection would you reccomend? I would personally prefer the first time be 'natural' (no condom or other products applied to the body). How reliable is the protection is she is on birth-control pills?
Also, we have 'discussed' oral sex. I was wondering (A) how should I request it so as to not make her uncomfortable (any more than she probably already will be) or degraded (as I know a large, dark shadow has been cast over oral pleasure) and (B) How would I best perform oral sex (and fingers) upon her?
One last thing... how exactly should I go about requesting/transfering into new positions (IE: asking her to try diffferent ways of placing it in her mouth [I saw you showed several ways] is something I'm REALLY not sure how to do) And one last note about oral, is it true that eating different foods can make the fluids taste more pleasent?
In short... I have no idea what in the hell to do to make it good when he begin having sex, and I need a few, er, lots of, pointers.....
I hope I put this in the right place...
Also I'd just like to say thanks to whoever made this site, it's very useful.... especially for someone who's ew and nervous bout asking for advice.... the 'ilustration' with the little puppets when you describe the positions really help to give a clear Idea... Thanks for helpin' us out
Welcome to the site A Soldare, we're all happy to see that you're educating yourself before proceding. You're also absolutely right about the questions you're asking. There is an enormous amount of information on this site, and I suggest you sit down and start reading thru it all.
You'll find that there is no single right answer to your questions. Size matters, no it doesn't. The pill's the best, no a condom and speramcide is best. This feels great to my g/f, no my g/f hates that. We're all different in what we like or don't like.
Read up, and talk with your g/f. Go slow. Baseball used to be the metaphore and sounds like you're a singles hitter who now wants to become a homerun hitter. That doesn't (and shouldn't) happen overnight.
There are, however, two consistent responses that you'll find from the members on this board:
USE PROTECTION and COMMUNICATE with your partner.
Well. most of your questions address issues that you simply have to learn from one another. There are goods and bads about each others' firsts. The bad is anything you do will be without practice! But you will learn those things quickly.
Congratulations on thinking ahead far enough that she may be on the pill. If 100 women use the pill for a year 3-5 will become pregnant during that year; If 100 women use a condom PLUS spermicidal jelly or foam for a year, 3-5 will become pregnant. Using a condom and on the pill, the chances of pregnancy are about as reduced as possible.
[QUOTE=Quote ]I was wondering if there were any tips you would give as far as how to please her (movements, tips for other forms of stimulation [or, 'fingering her']), minimizing the pain assosiated with the first time....[/QUOTE]
It is good that you are concerned with your girlfriend's comfort. It is important to have a lot of foreplay. If she is sexually aroused, she will find the experience both more enjoyable and less painfull, as arousal will cause her vagina to loosen and produce natural lubricant. You should also use plenty of not-so-natural lubricant, such as Astroglide, especially if you use a condom. This will make it easier to get your penis in and make it less painful for her. If you use a condom, be sure to use a water-based lube.
[QUOTE=Quote ]Also, what IS the average size of a man, and how much of a difference does size make?[/QUOTE]
I am not sure, but I think the average is close to five and a half inches. I personally don't think size makes much of a difference, but I am no expert, having only had experience with two penises (inside me at least). In this case, a smaller penis may actually be prefererable! Her first time is likely to be painful, and a large penis would only make it more so.
[QUOTE=Quote ]Also, ehat form(s) of protection would you reccomend? I would personally prefer the first time be 'natural' (no condom or other products applied to the body). How reliable is the protection is she is on birth-control pills?[/QUOTE]
While the pill may be an adequate form of birth control, you should note that it does not protect against STDs, as condoms and other barier methods do. If you are both virgins, the odds of one of you having an STD are pretty slim, but it is possible to contract some STDs through a number of other ways, such as oral sex or blood transfusions. If you plan to have sex without a condom, you should both get tested just in case.