Im not exactly sure why but when i have sex with my girlfriend I cant cum. No problem getting hard and staying hard for a long period of time but its the ejaculation part that kills me. She wants me to and i cant and it kills me that i cant give her what she wants. Because of that she feels that shes not good enough and etc. I have no problem doing it in my own but when she tries handjobs and oral it either takes so long that i become flacid or nothing.
Does anyone have any tips on that? I Googled and i couldn't find an answer.
I have an uncircumcised penis and is a little too big for her, i tried bigger condoms and despite that it feels much much better wearing magnums it still doesn't do the job :/
Welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy participating. Please begin by familiarizing yourself with the FAQs, the Posting Guidelines section, and especially the Index, all found at the top of the main page. This Index contains links to helpful informative insightful, as well as how-to articles that discuss the most common questions and concerns people ask about--like yours. If you click on the site's Home page you will find even more information.
Your concern is quite common, please read this article:
How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?
Simply put, the problem is one of technique and communication. When boys first learn to masturbate straight out of puberty we quickly develop a technique that is unique to each individual, even though we all do it basically the same way. If we vary too much from what we have come to rely upon either an orgasm will not happen, or, it will be less than expected. When we turn the reins over to a partner more often than not her technique will not be at all close to what you need. The same holds true for her with you.
The fix is to show her how you masturbate, then take her hand in yours and over the course of a few sessions, move it until she learns to mimic your unique technique. Next, give her verbal or non-verbal feedback on how you are responding to her touch/caress and what you need now/next.
With practice this should take care of the problem.
I hope this is of help. Got questions?
T-Dawg,
There could be a number of reasons for your problem. I usually have that problem after I have fought off an orgasm for a while. It becomes easier if you learn to relax. At this point you need to increase your arousal. You can do this in a number of ways. You can have your girlfriend increase your stimulation. She can kss you on your ears, neck or nipples. She can talk dirty to you while your having sex. Some women make the sexiest sounds when they cum. Increased communication helps a great deal.
You can choose a different postion. Doggey style provides great stimulation on the penis if you arch her back (depending on the woman pull here hair) and postioin yourself correctly. The most important thing to remember is the rhythm you choose. When your trying to cum use the same rhytm you use when you masturbate. When your relax and increase your stimulation it will become much easier for you to achieve orgasm.
Check this site out: [url=http://www.healthystrokes.com/]Healthy Strokes - Masturbation and More
You may have TMS.
I have this problem too. When my wife tries to suck me off or just use her hand to jack me off I can not cum, but when I (take matters into my own hands) I cum in about 10-15 minutes. I don't even have to be totally hard to cum. Why is this?
[QUOTE=itsfun;249345]I have this problem too. When my wife tries to suck me off or just use her hand to jack me off I can not cum, but when I (take matters into my own hands) I cum in about 10-15 minutes.
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Please read the article I mentioned, above. I referenced it not only for the o/p but for you and everybody else with this problem who is reading this thread.[/COLOR]
I don't even have to be totally hard to cum. Why is this?[/QUOTE]
Because having an erection is not a physiological necessity for having an ejaculation. Arousal and nerve stimulation are.
Older men who no longer experience erections or who have partial erections (without the help and benefit of E.D. meds) can and do have orgasms. Men of any age who have physical problems can and do, also.
A case and point for men in one of these situations is that he can walk out of a body of water (swimming pool, stream, lake, etc.) find that his penis has shriveled to perhaps a half inch in length, yet as long as it can be grasped, it can be stroked and as long as the stroking stimulates the nerves, he can climax. What's missing? Penetration, that's all.
try waiting till the last minute right before you cum, hold it and then let her jack/suck you off...
works for me..