Hello. So, i need some help. My guy doesnt seem to interested in having sex... now there is an age difference. Im 26 he's almost 40. I know sometimes that doesnt matter. He also has a stressful job. We only have sex like once a week. Id like to have it more. When i bring it up, he gets upset and says a relationship is not all about sex. And i know that..... it just makes me feel unwanted.... which probably is not the case. any help would be greatly appreciated :-) thanks.
Sun, 01/01/2012 - 16:40
#1
turning him on...
Have you tried some sexy clothes? I like it when the wife suddenly takes hold of me at some random time. That seems to get me 'involved' :)
[QUOTE=fallen_angel77242;276717]Hello. So, i need some help. My guy doesnt seem to interested in having sex... now there is an age difference. Im 26 he's almost 40. I know sometimes that doesnt matter. He also has a stressful job. We only have sex like once a week. Id like to have it more. When i bring it up, he gets upset and says a relationship is not all about sex. And i know that..... it just makes me feel unwanted.... which probably is not the case. any help would be greatly appreciated :-) thanks.[/QUOTE]
If his job is so stressful then this is likely to be a big factor for his lack of interest in sex
You are both correct, sex is not everything in a relationship but it is a big part of it.
Have you tried explaining that you feel unwanted because of the lack of intimacy. if he realizes this then I am sure he will make a greater effort. -
On the topic of trying something new - once my good lady told me that she had no panties on. We were on a night out and knowing this was incredibly arousing and I just couldn't wait to get her home - good luck
Thank you both. I just feel like im bothering him sometimes. I have tried talking to him, but it doesnt help much. I do KNOW he loves me. So, thats not the issue. If you think of anything else, hit me up. Thanks again :-)
"hit me up" - well that's a new one on me - :confused:
Haha, sorry. I mean, just let me know. :-)
A cleavage - a short skirt - sexy underwear or no underwear - sometimes just the brush of her hand as she passes or the smell of her perfume. Sometimes she might tease me and touch my crouch or my bum as she walks past - dirty or suggestive chat will always do it for me.
These are just a few. Try and get his mind off work if you think that is the problem. A 26 year old lady should be a real turn on to a 40 year old man - well it would be for most so I am sure that as soon as you nail the problem then your bedroom will be a place of intense passion :)
OMG - just let it go. No underwear, sexy clothing - BAH!
You're a 26 yr old female - all you have to do is "just show up" and be "interested".
A stressed out 40 yr old is NOT going to be an ardent lover - he's not 26 any more and this is not Oz, Toto. At age 40, he's beginning to slow into lower hormone levels and a maturer state of mind. Once a week may be enough for him and there are tons of men who would be overjoyed at getting once a week.
So, NO, it isn't you.
But you do have to ask yourself the question if THIS is the life you want to lead for the rest of your life. It is no good thinking he'll change or that you will change him - never happens. You have to take what you get and if all he can offer you is once a week then you have to decide if once a week is enough for you.
Sorry, but there it is.
> > Have you tried explaining that you feel unwanted because of the lack of intimacy. if he realizes this then I am sure he will make a greater effort.
What seems to be missing in the discussion is the difference between intimacy and sex.
He may not be UP for having sexual relations {Foreplay &/or Intercourse) more than once a week or so; however, many a relationship can survive the interim with lots of intimacy.
* Kiss, Cuddle, fool around and make out with no demands for "sex" for him.
* Enjoy the intimacy of being next to one another and kissing and cuddling and maybe some fondling. Often this is sufficient for a woman. The husband can attend to her needs, the needs of the relationship, yet not feel put upon when he is not in the mood to be aroused and "perform".
At age 40, he's beginning to slow into lower hormone levels and a maturer state of mind. Once a week may be enough for him and there are tons of men who would be overjoyed at getting once a week.
OMG Evil Kitten - I have just checked and I still have a pulse :):p
[QUOTE=ludaje;276892]
OMG Evil Kitten - I have just checked and I still have a pulse :):p[/QUOTE]
I would think that given you're actively on a sex related site you're in the 90% percentile already. :)
Tsk! @ ludaje
It takes more than a pulse, buddy!