If a girl tells you that wile she was dating her Ex boyfriend, for about a year and half and keeping in mind that wile they were been both sexually active with each other..... She said she never had an orgasm with this person....And that i was actually her first orgasm..... The question is ? is this possible ? could she have actually never had an orgasm with him through out all that time.... ? what about her fist time as a virgin ? do they reach orgasm for the first time when they loose there virginity ?
thanks.
Sun, 11/27/2011 - 08:26
#1
True or Lie ?
Try reading around this site before asking a question that has been asked and answered 10000 times over.
Yes you can go a million times without ever having an orgasm. Both men and women can engage in sexual activities without ever reaching an orgasm. I personally have had sex many times where I don't have an orgasm. I just physically can't. It has discouraged the girls I have been with (since apparantely this problem is rarer in men).
A quarter of all women don't ever experience an orgasm. Some never get comfortable enough with a partner to orgasm. Some never become aroused enough. Now before you let this whole thing of "you being the first to make her cum" get to your head, keep a few things in mind.
First, you did NOT make her cum. She had an orgasm and you HELPED her achieve it. We are responsible for our own orgasms. Sure our partners can help, but ultimately we need to know what we enjoy in order to convey that to our lovers. We have to be secure enough to relax and give in to our pleasures. I am usually too nervous the first time I have sex with a new partner to even come close to an orgasm. Is it there fault? No! I just don't relax enough.
Second, just because its happened once, doesn't mean it will happen everytime. You can't just ram it in and expect her to get off. You have to pay attention to her body and her response to your actions. I have seen many people think that they are a sexual god because their girlfriend cums 1 time. Don't let this be you!
As for your question about orgasming when they lose their virginities. I (in case you haven't figured it out, I am a male) did not cum the first dozen times I had sex. My girlfriend came within a few seconds. The next virgin I slept with, has still yet to have an orgasm (she's been having regular sex for 4 years now) she still loves it though. More than most girls. The most recent virginity that I had the honor of relieving from a girl resulted in multiple orgasms. It took her at least 10 minutes but after that, she seemed to get off from everything. Play with her nipples, orgasm. Bite her neck, orgasm, spank her, orgasm.
As you can see, everyone is different. Some get off very easily and some can't no matter what happens. But then again, I have a decent amount of experience when it comes to sexual activites. Just like some girls can get off from oral, I know some girls who don't. It all comes down to the luck of the draw....or should I say the luck of our sexual wiring.
A quarter of all women go their entire lives with no orgasms. It is rare for an orgasm to accompany her first experience. The oldest patient I have had experiencing her first orgasm was a fifty-three year old grandmother; there have been several in their thirties, with children.
As Ducy indicates, YOU have some learning to do about women's bodies. Read around and we will be happy to clear up questions.
[QUOTE=LatinLover;275868][COLOR="blue">She said she never had an orgasm with this person....And that i was actually her first orgasm..... The question is ? is this possible ? [/COLOR]
As answered above--yes.
[COLOR="blue">could she have actually never had an orgasm with him through out all that time.... ?[/COLOR]
As answered above--yes.
[COLOR="blue">what about her fist time as a virgin ? do they reach orgasm for the first time when they loose there virginity ?[/COLOR]
Rarely if ever. Why? The only reference boys have about human sexuality and response is from what they know about themselves, unless they do some reading. Unlike boys who begin masturbating right out of puberty, not so the typical girl who learns how much later if at all. Girls are not driven to learn how to masturbate as are boys. For them orgasms are not the biological imperative they are for us. Girls must make a much more concerted effort to learn how while for us learning is almost second nature.
First time intercourse rarely if ever results in a girl/woman experiencing an orgasm. There are many reasons ranging from pain as the hymen is torn, discomfort during insertion even if the hymen has been worn away, concern about possible distractions inside or outside, worries about what may or may not happen, etc.
It also take time to become comfortable with the new partner and to develop trust. It also takes time for a couple to get in tune with each other both emotionally and with techniques. Please keep in mind that making love is a partnership and is what we do with and for each other, now to each other.
[COLOR="blue">thanks.[/COLOR][/QUOTE]
Please read the article on experience.
[quote=Ducy]Just like some girls can get off from oral, I know some girls who don't. It all comes down to the luck of the draw....or should I say the luck of our sexual wiring. [/quote]
First and foremost it comes down to communication, feedback, and showing each other what to do how and when which is where feedback becomes important. What works for one girlfriend may or may not work in exactly the same way for another.
I recommend starting by familiarizing yourselves with the Index found at the top of the main page. It contains links to articles that discuss the most common questions and concerns people ask about. In addition, if you click on the site's Home Page you will find even more information.
I urge the two of you to read every article in the Index, discuss what you have learned, then add the information to what each of you already knows. Knowledge is empowering. So, explore and learn together.
I hope this is of help. Got questions?
-doc