I think most girls get turned on by romance. I know that, with every girl that I've dated, that's the case.

With my current girlfriend of 2.5 years, there isn't as many romantic evenings as there used to be, but when one comes around she loves it.

I set up a stereotypical romantic dinner (used the nice dishes, dimmed the lights, lit candles, etc) and then afterwards put on some slow music and we danced. She absolutely loves to dance. This put her in the mood more than any foreplay ever could!

So, yeah, I would say that most girls the "corny" stuff makes them rather horny.

Or maybe she's just turned on by the way you over-analyze every little thing...

You seriously need to relax and just start enjoying life, Ducy. Not everything in this world is a puzzle that needs figuring out. I swear - if you went out and got a massage you'd probably be here an hour later asking why it gave you a boner. Just go with it...

It's not bad to be passionate about learning what turns her on, but you've got a point. There are some things that turn out best if you don't think about it too much.

Meh...sometimes it works but generally I prefer being close afterwards. Well, if he did that for me of course I'd be in the mood. But I'm in the mood just the same if we have dinner with his parents then go play World of Warcraft for a bit. :p I think it really depends on the mood. Personally I separate emotional and physical connection during the act. I'm not lying there thinking "oh my god he's so good because I love him" I'm thinking "oh my god he's so good, he always gets the right angle". I dunno...

[quote=Ducy;206079]Dude oed I was just curious cuz I never knew this and I kinda found it interesting...and I could care a less why I get a boner haha.[/quote]Have you considered a career in Philosophy? :)

For me, it is true to an extent.
If I feel that I'm important to a guy and he's doing things to show it, it makes me feel special and I want to return it.

However, nothing turns me off more than a guy who does those things because he thinks it leads to sex and is expecting it. I don't like feeling like a prostitute and I think alot of guys make that mistake.

Showing her affection increases her security about your relationship and the increased security makes her feel more comfortable whereupon she opens up more toward you and feels more inclined to show you how she really feels. It is when you give her the impression that she's taken for granted that you have to really work hard to enjoy sex with her.

DUH!

Come on, Ducy! You KNOW this already!

Excellent insight EEK. If only we men were able to understand as much about women, we would be a force to be reckoned with...

The 'trick' in all of this is to show her affection in the way she understands it. This will vary from woman to woman. If you observe how she shows affection and pays attention to you, you will know how she wants you to pay attention and show affection to her. Give what you get.

For example:

For Sera, you need to be a secure, upstanding guy with an independent life who shows her the respect and affection with a gentle approach. (I'm supposing here.)

For me, you have to come to me with your mind up and running, laughter in your heart, and the fire of desire for me in your eyes.

Do you see?

[QUOTE]Oh and emilie...I hope your not getting the wrong idea from me...Im not the kind of guy to do this.[/QUOTE]

Never said you were :) Just answering the question.

It's somthing that I noticed about 1 year into my marriage (we're divorced now) I have physical problems with sex and it caused my libido to plummet to non existant. Every single time my husband bought some present for me, he'd push for sex. He'd get really pissed off and moody until I'd give in and just sleep with him. I started to hate the sight of flowers and the more he continued, the bigger my problem became to the point of him buying random crap we didn't need, I didn't want and had told him not to get.

He (honestly) didn't even realise he was doing it... unfortunately I did and thought it was deliberate at the time.

Whoops, sorry for the somewhat hijack.

Did you let him know how you felt about it? We are sorta like trained animals in some respect. When one thing seems to work we tend to keep using that same method because it works. He wasnt getting any sexual response from you from your plummeted sex drive so when he got you gifts and you gave in that was an open door to being able to get a response. As much as I think giving gifts and acting sweet for sex is wrong, in his case I sorta feel bad for the guy. Maybe he was unsure what you wanted and why you didnt want to be with him. Also gotta remember that intimacy is a major factor in relationships, I believe I read that in EEKs into for her superb sex. =p

You may have, bluetide, intimacy is something everyone needs although it does come in various forms. The lack of inrimacy is highly corrosive to one's self-esteem and to one's relationships. There is some debate upon which corrodes first, the self-esteem or the relationship but it is too close a race to call in my opinion.

You have to communicate but with some care. Too much, too soon is scary. Too little too late is insufficient. Both partners, or all partners, need to talk so the other(s) understand.

And flowers do not make up for a lack of communication.