Hi there…
Both my partner and I are 17, and are thinking of starting having sex. We’ve discussed it a lot, and I’m confident that we’re both ready. Having been ‘victim’ to pressured sex before, I’ve made her promise me she’s genuinely ready, and not just doing it to appease me.
She’s a virgin, and I’ve had some (rather limited) experience with a previous girlfriend, that which I’d very much like to forget. This time, however, I’ve taken things much slower, and am confident in myself that this time, it is the right thing to do.
However, I’m starting to worry a little. My girlfriend is quite petite, 5’1’’, and a size six. My concern is, having explored through fingering and the like, that she simply isn’t ‘big’ enough to accommodate my penis. I am in no way insinuating I have an overly large penis, I guess it’s about average size, but I worry that penetrating her will either cause her immense pain, or actually prove impossible. This may sound stupid, but it really concerns me. When fingering, she often displays discomfort at more than one finger entering her, and I’ve estimated my penis to be about the diameter of three fingers, hence my concerns. I’m not sure of my question really, simply looking for advice or guidance. I’m very much of the belief that communication is the key in any relationship, but I find it hard discussing this with my partner, because I fear I may risk making her feeling inadequate, or like the problem is her fault.
I’m not expecting our first time together to be amazing, and I suppose that all this said, time will tell, and I’ll just wait and see, I’m simply wanting to know if there’s anything I can do to make it as pleasurable for all those concerned (well, us two!).
I just want to see if any others, men or women, have had similar experiences, or concerns.
Sorry if this post is somewhat pointless, I realise there is no direct question.
Thank you in advance for any response.
Regards,
Winch
Sun, 02/12/2006 - 10:12
#1
too big?
You are not going to be "too big" unless you have an extremely large long and thick penis. The vagina is designed to expand to make a baby come out of it.
She is experiencing discomfort because she is a small petite virgin girl who is tight.
I am 5'2". I'm a small petite girl where narrowness runs in the family. My guy is about average. 5" girth, about 7" long. Sex was no walk in the park for me my first few times. It was quite painfuly really. Fingering bothered me too. But the pain eventually stopped, as it should. I got some lube that helped emmensely and worked with myself with a dildo about his size until the pain eventually stopped. It wasn't easy. I gave up after awhile because it still hurt but one day I just picked it up again and had no problems. I also started using tampons and that helped with the stretching some.
So my advice to you, go slow. Pay attention to her. Look at her and if you can tell that she is in pain, stop. Ask her if she's ok. Ask her if she would like you to continue.
As I said my first time was painful but my guy always paid attention to me. Even when I told him to keep going he could tell that I was in pain and he would stop and we would try something else. I'll never forget that. It's what made it memorable for me.
Also get some lube and some condoms. My lube of choice is astroglide. Worked wonders for me. Still does. I can't do it without the lube thanks to the narrowness that runs in the family. It's kind of painful from time to time when I first start (as there's generally months in between the time I do it) so I just go at it real slow for a minute or so till I get adjusted and then I'm good to go.