While the three of us agree that you are no longer a virgin, technically, I do believe my recommendation has merit on philosophical as well as psychological grounds. I believe this is an important consideration when it comes to both peace of mind as well as state of mind.

First a question: Why do you want to give a fella who only wants to go out with a virgin the time of day let alone several hours of your day/night? Sounds to me like he is extremely narrow minded and his mind only has one thing on it--taking your virginity at some point. This doesn't sound to me like a person who is interested in the real you--your mind. I think you can do much better than this oaf. Do not be desperate.

Now for the answer. In western societies a woman is considered to be a virgin up until the time a penis enters her vagina. Western women are also physically more active so very often the hymen erodes away from sports or using Tampons. It is unfortunate you were raped not once but twice. I hope you are able to deal with what was done to you.

I believe you are well within your rights to tell this fella or any other that you date in the future that you are a virgin because you haven't chosen to have intercourse yet. You need not bring up the subject of rape unless or until much later and then only if the guy is a keeper. It serves no purpose to tell him and if he is this callous, he probably will talk about the matter with friends and not respect your privacy. Another way of looking at whether or not to tell a boyfriend is to ask the question--"of what benefit is it for him to know?"

In some Middle Eastern societies, women are examined by a family or village elder in order to categorically state that the hymen is intact and therefore the woman is a virgin. If the hymen is torn no matter what the cause, she is judged not to be a virgin, rightly or wrongly presuming she has had sex, and the boyfriend's family is so informed. She is then ostracized by her community. In the west, we tend to take a woman at her word.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

Technically, you have had a penis in you and are therefore not virgin. Any jerk who holds rape against a woman is not worth your time. His thinking is from the old days of male dominance and I can assure you that involved his entire view of women as chattel.

You really do not want to go out with him.

EMO - kick this man to the curb and move on without looking back NOW!!!

The LAST thing you need is to date an egotistical imbecile who thinks relationships are ALL ABOUT HIM and what HE wants.

EMO - life is too short and there are LOTS of willing men in the world.

BTW - no, you're not a virgin.