Whew! That's a relief! lol. I really couln't think of anything else.

I think as long as both of you are happy, you shouldn't worry about whether it's too much or too little sex. Just enjoy being happy. Glad you worked it out.

i know what you're saying, and i know that but i don't remember if i posted it or not but i'm on my period ... so we wouldn't have sex normally anyway at this time. i don't think i'm going to do this again but i just thought it would be fun to see how long we could both hold off from not doing anything as long as my period lasts. its kinda fun cuz now we're both in this little game and we're like teasing eachother and stuff... but its also nice to know that as soon as i get off my period all this pressure thats been building up is gonna explode!

but anyways back to the original point... all i wanted in the first place was to cut down sex just a little bit so it doesn't become so casual.

Hmmm. One (perhaps overly simplistic) thought regarding both posts is "variety is the spice of life." I think we can sometimes work too hard at making and keeping sex special. It then becomes more about the creative challenge than it does having fun and pleasure.

And looking at the last question from ImaChic I think the answer is "No." The truth is you don't want to have sex. You may have a shot at making him understand why you don't want to, but you also (apparently) made this decision somewhat unilaterally.

I see a control issue, not a sex issue, and I'm not working too hard at "reading between the lines."

The point of the thread is "making it special" and there are many ways to do that other than holding off for a long time.

Special can include anything that's "different." Who's the aggressor... what you do and how you do it... including props and toys... the idea is to surprise each other and yourselves.

Hmmm... well, from a guy's perspective there is NO such thing as too much sex.  And every time is special- especially when there is another person involved...lol.

I do see what you are saying and maybe you could just let him know that you aren't testing him.  You're just trying to make the next time very special.  I don't know.  With guys, it's kind of like a boiler building up steam- too long without releasing a little pressure can make them blow...lol.  If nothing else, he's going to want to masturbate.  Maybe you could do that together?  

Maybe if I think about this some more, I can come up with something else.

Well, if you haven't had sex in a while, I'm guessing that it won't take much to get him going...lol.

Why not try a nice sensual massage with oil and candles? I recommend a nice patchouli scented oil ( smell it before you buy to make sure you like it). It's not too feminine for him to enjoy.

well you know, they say the longer you way, the better it is.
(which one day i will find out if it's true or not. no. really.)

me, personally, all i have to do is look at my guy and he can pretty much read what's in my mind and it turns him on.

but yes..i like oberon's idea.
go with a massage. massages are good..even if they're only the shoulders. if done right, even a shoulder massage can get you in the mood.

i agree with what oberon and notsosure said, massages are always a good way to start. i know i nice sensual massage would sure get me in the mood!

ok i don't want to start a new thread but i'll post my qs here cuz it kinda relates to the topic of "waiting" well... ever since me and my bf started having sex (about 2months ago) we've been doing it almost everyday and sometimes 2-3 times a day. i can't complain, i mean i love it! and we're both always in the mood but i'm starting to feel like if we keep this up it'll start to lose its specialness... and i don't want to spoil him either, where he expects it like everyday. cuz i want him to desire it everytime... well today i just started my period and we're not going to do it during it, so that means we'll have to wait like a week which is really good cuz then he will have to wait anyways w/out me telling him "no" or anything. and i told him already that i want to decrease sex a little so it doesn't lose its meaning and he just kinda looked at me weird and kept on asking me why, i think he's taking it personally like i don't want to do it as much cuz i don't like it as much as he does. well we have good communication so he'll just have to understand but anyways i told him that during this week we'renot going to do ANYTHING, no blowjobs, handjobs, etc. this will be interesting cuz we've never gone this long w/out anything, but of course he just doesn't listen like its been the first day, and he's already asked me twice for a bj and i refused telling him to remember what i said. is there just anything else i can say to make him understand that its not because i don't want to?