That's the benefit of being in a dating level of commitment. If the one isn't "enough" for your drive, you line up 2 or 3 or 10 to even it out.

;)

Now, now - let us not make the mistake of thinking one cannot be committed to more than just the one man. Consider it 'reverse Mormonism' if you like.

"I will not have it fall on my head that that did not occur! He had every right to, as you said go and find somone else who was willing"

I am actually with you on that. He is just as capable of expressing his intent as you are. I would never feel obliged to entertain his desires if he didn't feel confident enough to tell me what they were.

But what I think EEK is trying to get at is that you are saying one thing and doing another. If you say no to going home with them, then DON'T GO HOME WITH THEM. What you are doing is telling them that you're a flake who may very well change her mind.

Be strong in your assertions. No should mean "no".

Getting 'serious' means neither being in your 20's nor being at university will last much longer so what do you intend to do to meet your dreams/goals - assuming you have dreams/goals?

Once you leave university and your current friends move on with their lives (getting into their own careers, getting married and having their children; they will not have time for you) the men you will meet aren't going to be your friends. You will be judged based upon their criteria, their needs, and their desires, not necessarily yours. The good men aren't going to cut you any slack because they don't play games and know who they want.

The men I asked would all give their eye teeth and left testicle to be married to a loving wife and to have children. But they've all been through the mill before and aren't willing to get screwed again. They are highly selective, demanding and very critical. Perhaps some inexperienced 30 something guy would be more forgiving.

Forewarned is forearmed.

Firmus gives good advice. That is what you want; ask for it!

And, forget about the time of month. Some of the best sex is a bit messy. In fact, using ultraviolet light you will find there is nearly as much "stuff" spread around you the rest of the month; it just is not colored red.

Well there you go. You're course is clear. Ring him up and say "come over and get some crazy sex!" and then just listen by the window for the sound of screeching tires. :)

That was to RR by the way Spring. I've gotten this thread crossed in my mind with some other ones that are more long term couple things. So I was reading these oddly.

As for the friends being friends, yes I whole heartedly agree with that. However, the kissing would be a mixed signal to me, because I'm assuming when you're over with your female friends you're not kissing and cuddling as well? While affection is good in it's own right, it's also pulling a double duty of being a precursor to more intimacy. Just like him feeling your breasts is a precursor for more intimacy. Granted one is a bit "more" than the other, but still. They are both an easy thing to confuse. At least to me as a guy. :)

Take care...

I'm sorry, I thought this thread was about people that were already a couple. These threads are all starting to read the same to me. lol :)

I was reading your comment as "I invited my boyfriend over and stripped naked..." and not "I was naked when a stranger came by the window..." so you can see my confusion.

But I love that you are a loving and compassionate person. There needs to be more of us. :) But with that, you would inherently not put a person in a position of great temptation knowing no recourse would happen. Just like I'd never make a dinner like that without you getting to join me. :)

I wonder maybe if the confusion for this thread is a cultural thing? A dating scene like a bar here has an implied "I'm here to find X" and X is almost always sex, unless clarified. So to pull someone out of there to take home without a clear outline can lead them to believe the hunt worked that night. Where you live is it an implied "nothing will happen" unless clarified?

This also is the guys fault though, as he needs to be clear by saying "look, I'm out on the town looking for sex. If that's not what you're offering to take me home for then thanks, but I'm moving on." I think too many guys wait and hope that a mood will change.

Take care... :)

Firmus, it's the most extreme of examples I picked, because I want there to be no doubt about my point of view at all.

And as far as I'm aware, we're discussing people who are in the phase of getting to know eachother. Or who have just met. Or even: only looked at eachother from the other side of the bar. If I pass by a stranger's house with the chocolate cake and all, I'm sorry, but there's no braincell that would assume that's for me. If I'm invited into someone's home and all this is displayed, I'd hope I could join, but I wouldn't expect it when this wasn't part of the invitation. Wouldn't hang around either when they start, but that's my freedom of choice to leave. If disappointed, I won't take that out on someone I've just met or don't really know.

And let me be clear on that I've dealt with someone sending mixed signals -because he had mixed feelings- for over a year, as he withheld all sexual activity, while he was in an exclusive relationship with me. And to some extend: I still deal with it. So really: I know what type of agony we're discussing here. That's not academic, that's heartfelt. And my plea above is off course a product of my mind, but it springs from my genuine feeling about people. I go through this world being loving and compassionate. But I won't protect anyone from being tempted. I'd make myself responsible for what they feel. When they are. I won't take out all the shades of colors and grays, because it's easy for them to think black/white. Wouldn't I belittle them if I did?

I equally can't believe what I just read. :)

Say we were dating. You come home to a cleaned house, dimly lit by candles at the table, which is set with your favorite meal. Wine is chilled, soft music is on, and over on the side table you see a fantastic looking 3 layer chocolate cake. Expertly iced on it reads "All for you".

As you walk in with your mouth watering, I mention in a passing comment that none of this is for you. I sit down and enjoy it all, alone, while you're left standing there. I eat my fill, blow out the candles, and wash it all away. You can't tell me that wouldn't make you feel left out!

So yes, academically speaking, you're correct that nothing a woman does should give implied consent to a man, even feverishly masturbating in front of him. But you're not thinking of the "why". Why would you invite a man over and do that? Your example would only make sense in an established relationship, where he knows that at other times he'll be involved. To do that with a new person wouldn't take into account his wants. You effectively would pull him out of a potential dating scene, then throw it in his face that it didn't work out tonight.

I'm sorry but I can't believe what I'm reading here. Such expectations based on nothing are all in his own head. Particularly when literally told otherwise. I stand by that no man or woman can be accused of "leading on" to something. I don't care if a woman would lie naked with her legs spread fingering herself. If she says she doesn't want sex with him, he has no right touching her. And every thought or feeling or vibe he thought he was getting from her is his problem, not hers. He may feel it, off course he may, his feelings are his. But they're also his to deal with. We're very much equipped to do that.

And I get a bit sick of the way we're generalizing men and women. If we'd stop generalizing such men's behavior and "approving" of it, they won't feel so entitled to have such grand expectations. We wouldn't be creating new generations of little boys who expect this to be the basics of male behavior. We wouldn't be creating little girls who think it's part of their role as women to play no to say yes, because that's the way we told them men think. Or even worse; that women need to protect men from temptation.

Among others this justification of behavior is why my mother taught me that men are either pathetic or monstrous. But they are not. They are just as much clearly thinking human beings. With evolved brains that make them very capable of analyzing input -even conflicting- weighing it and deciding upon it. Apart from a few that haven't evolved since the stone-age, there is no need to give men a "special treatment" as if their little brains couldn't handle their urges vs spoken words. They can. Just as much as women can. We both have the evolved brains to deal with it. If there are men who are not able to handle supposed temptation, it's because we've taught them there was no need to. Just like when you'd push a baby down on the ground, it will never learn humans can walk upright. People are better -so much better- not to mention beautiful creatures. I'm very much in favor of treating eachother with love and compassion; it's human. But I find it disheartening to regard men as less.

Yes, I understand, RR, but in the snake=pit of the dating scene for those NOT in college or high school - once or twice might be all the chance you get. Men are intensely interested in women and they get very, very good at 'reading' the women they meet.

Spring may not think she's making promises, or saying anything in particular to any one man, but this may not be the case. What she's drinking, what she's wearing, how she's sitting/walking/standing - all of it will be scrutinized, categorized and an opinion will be formed even before he speaks to her - if he speaks to her. Presentation, demeanor, body language, attitude - all of it says something about us to others - without a word being spoken.

She needs to be clear in her own mind of what she wants - and I am not getting a sense of clarity and purpose from her.

True Ducy. People do need to be clear on what they mean. But in Spring's posts, I didn't see her being dishonest about what she does and does not want. Neither does she seem to leave him unpleased. Au contraire, I'd say :) Feeling insulted then seems like a hyperbole and quite inappropriate. If he does, blaming himself for not enjoying, seems like a better way to handle this than blaming her.

Off course it can be frustrating when expectations don't match, when you've interpreted words differently or when things in practice don't work out as planned. But especially when you're getting to know eachother, it's not that weird or rare to happen. Communication remains an interaction between people. Misunderstandings are part it. And since people generally don't pick up their notebook and checklist to compare sexual preferences before spending the night together:rolleyes:

I think she means you shouldn't give someone hope for something else. If you invite a man out fo coffee don't let him think he's going to get a piece of coffee cake if your only interest is coffee.

I have been the first one called for a "booty call" before. It was pretty lame when I got there and after going down on her she said "k thanx bye". I was under the impression she wanted sex and that I would get something out of it at the very least. Her idea of a booty call was "You please me and go home frustrated. I play pillow princess and just lay here"

That was unfair. On the other hand, I have received phone calls from an old fling where she would simply say "I'm horny, can't really talk because my roomate is here. Will you talk dirty to me." And that was fine because I knew up front I what the "limits" were and what I could expect from it.

I don't believe there is anything wrong with a

"I want to play around but not go all the way."

When I first started dating, the girl I lost my virginity to actually told me the first time we made out, "I just wanna kiss you for now, if it gets too far, ill say so."

We continued on for several months with me testing the waters until one day while driving home from a day at the beach she said "Hey I'm ready to have sex now."

He's MALE - he's ALWAYS seeking sex in some form or other. Thank Goodness or else we'd have a tougher time of it. Remember, a man will endure 300 NOs to get one YES - one could say, men are always HOPING or HOPEFUL.

so - using your example: "Went out clubbing with group of friends, ended out making out with one of them. Had a good night. He kept insisting we go back to campus and have a good night. I was enjoying the dancing, and said I wanted to stay for a bit, but said we could go back to mine for some food and smoke after. I fully stated, you realise I enjoy your company and we are JUST going back for food. If he interpreted that as we are going back for sex, or thought he could seduce me once we were, that is surely his prerogative is has been clearly stated otherwise. He should have no expectations other than those stated, right? Was actually a really nice night, just had some food, watched a film, kissed...a lot, and he stayed over, but nothing more. Clearly stated case before hand."

NOT clearly stated, sorry, Spring - that is an example of a MIXED MESSAGE par excellence!

Kissing on him all evening, "no sex but come back to my place", kissing on him back at your place - ugh - asking him to not have expectations under those circumstances is like asking a donkey to do algebra - not going to happen. And then you let him stay over. WHY? So he'll think he might 'get lucky' in the morning? His hopes were dim, I'll admit it but he still had those hopes. I guarantee he did. Because previous experience has taught him that she mght change her mind no matter what she says now. You're not 'one of the guys' so you can't act as if you were one minute and then kiss and fondle him the next minute.

Your example with your bf is almost as bad. Look, just get over feeling odd about your period etc., be up front, and just make sure your actions fit your words. If it is 'no sex' then do not get private with him - period. If it is 'no sex' then stop revving his engines by kissing and fondling him - period. It simply is not fair.

It definitely shouldn't be an expectation, but as a guy the main difference is the age old "a guy always wonders if he's having sex, but the women already knows."

The reason we (ie. the gentlemen, not the bastards that take by deviance or force) seem to badger about "Are we? Aren't we? When? How often? Can we again? Right now? When?" is because ultimately we don't have that decision power. Speaking for myself, my wife knows I'm a guaranteed 100% yes answer. I would wager that most men, regardless how sleepy, regardless if sick, regardless of getting caught, regardless if at a funeral, would take sex if offered. Especially if we don't already have a steady supply from you.

All kidding aside, we just want to know. Just remember we're morons too. Anything implied will be taken as an implied maybe, not an implied no. In my guy mind, an invitation to go back to Steak N' Shake means "we're getting food". An invitation back to a house means "I want you alone as something may happen". The analytical part of me knows that's not really what's meant, but clearly if there's an opportunity for sex it's gonna be at the house, not the restaurant. My mind sees "I want to take you somewhere with a better chance of sex happening."

Take care...

EEK, that may be true. But was he really invited? Or is this based on his assumption?
Promises can only remain unfulfilled when a promise was made.

Once? I see nothing wrong going on for days, weeks, months getting to know eachother.

I find it very odd that we're discussing this and feel I must be misunderstanding... Are we really talking about this in a nutshell:
X: "I like you, I give you an hj/bj! And do please me with your hands and lips too!".
Y: "Well, ok... But I'll only put up with this for this one time. Next time my penis better get inside that pussy. Or I'll feel insulted and disheartened"
:eek::confused:

Some women, yes; some women, no - and some women can orgam because the wind caresses their sunbaked skin just right or because it is Tuesday.

But, RR, if you invite him for dinner and stop at the appetizer - nevertheless he's going to feel 'other than joyous'. Just as you might if the position were reversed. Like I said - once, well ok but more than once - promises unfulfilled sort of thing. Be quite sure he knows what you intend in advance so he has the option to decline the invitation.

To offer sex and then stop before penetration is a bit like "bait & switch" if that wasn't spelt out beforehand. Play fair is all I am saying.

Springfever, yes off course you can bond through foreplay-activities! You're sharing intimacy and sexuality together, exploring and pleasing eachother. I find the term foreplay quite misleading. As if it's bound to "lead" to something. As if it's "minor activity". Oral sex is sex. And unless I'm misunderstanding EEK, I thus disagree with her.

It is surely not an insult to give him oral sex. He should be joyous over what you're giving and what you're sharing in that moment, instead of focusing on what else he could get!

I'd consider that greedy or at least very negative. To go with the appetizer-example. I would be quite flabbergasted if I'd invite someone for a drink, that he'd assume to stay for dinner too. If I invite someone for coffee in the evening, it doesn't mean he'll be spending the night. If he'd respond offended when I make either clear, that would be very rude.

I also don't think you're teasing. In your example of a dialogue you seem very clear on what you do and do not want. That's not a "maybe". That's a clear yes and no for now, and a maybe as prospect. And that's only logical. No-one can look into a crystal ball and see if the future brings what's expected. There are no guarantees on how things will develop between two people. Neither is it the goal he should adjust himself to expectations, he should just be himself and you be you. Until you got to know eachother better physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. Whatever makes you convinced you want to share this with him. Those are your terms and needs and all he can do is agree to it or not.

Whatever your reasons. You shouldn't have to hide behind virginity or religion, what counts is the integrity of your own body and mind. He should respect that, just as much as you should respect him. Everyone is different when it comes to sexual preference. You certainly aren't the only girl in town that regards sexual activity the way you do. Just like there are women who enjoy vaginal sex, but refuse to engage in oral sex. Even if they did with a previous partner, no man can expect of her to do so. Or perhaps; she decided it's not for now. As some only perform oral sex after they've established a firmer bond with their partner. It all needs to be respected. No need to become childish when it doesn't match. You could talk about it, seek to understand the other's point of view, never pushing someone or using guilt, and in the end it's a choice of accepting or not. The only thing he can do if he doesn't, is politely say that you apparently don't match in sexual preference, that he refuses to spend more time with you when prospects aren't guaranteed and he'd like to move on. It was nice meeting you, thank you for the good times... Something along those lines.

Now I'm far from an expert on situations like yours. But I would advice you to stay true to yourself and be honest to him (whoever he is). Because first of all; all that's left in the end is the integrity of your own mind. And second, if you wouldn't honor this, you'll be creating a foundation of lies. That can't be a good ground to grow on. Personally I'd say that if he can't respect your honesty and can't take joy in today, then there's no good prospect for tomorrow. But that's up to you to decide.

Men do want to reproduce, yes, but their fun lies mainly in pleasing women better than the next man in a curious cooperative competition kind of way. See the book Sex at Dawn for more complete info on this point.

Think of the concept "repeat business" - as in "better the lady you have" than facing up to the 300 rejections (more or less) you have to endure to get another lady to just give you that one opportunity to thrill her and since the first sex you have with someone is pretty much the worst sex you will have with that person, your chances of thrilling her are somewhat less than optimal.

YES - see sex from the man's perspective! He's in this too, hun!

Foreplay, oral and manual sex, body worship, outercourse - all of those are "appetizers" to get everyone ready, relaxed and participating in preparation for the main event, the entre', of actual orgasmic penetrative intercourse. While "its all good", there still is nothing exactly like penetrative intercourse for both genders.

For someone's who is supposedly "over-thinking" sex - you haven't really thought sex through.

Yes, sex is for reproduction - but that's SECONDARY - sex's primary function, in animals without a 'heat cycle', is to BOND PEOPLE in multi-male/multi-female mating systems. It is that absence of a 'heat cycle' that tells the tale. You can say NO or you can say YES - almost ALL other animals cannot - they have no choice. Therefore, sex for humans is more about bonding than about reproduction. Whether you bond for ever and ever or for the next 5 minutes is immaterial and irrelevant. That you got naked and enjoyed some sex with your partner is all that matters.

Having said that, your stopping at the appetizers is somewhat disheartening and I can see why some men would find it a slap in their face as you're effectively telling him he is not 'good enough' to invite for dinner (using the dining metaphor from above). A man worth having would comply..once..after that, he'd move you into the 'friend' category where a lesser man would regard you as a public utility "blow job queen" aka "get your rocks off for $5." And why not? You insulted him first. (Kid stuff yes but so many of us are in such situations). Please reconsider your position on this point. Say YES or NO and stop saying MAYBE.

Fear of being hurt. Now why would you get upset at a man's revealing his character? Just think of that first guy. If he had NOT lied to you, you might have wasted more time on him. He saved you the trouble and effort. Thank the man and move on. Stop making every subsequent man pay for that first man's mistake. That's just not fair. Plus, you found out that you will not abide dishonesty so you learned something important about yourself. Score!! So that one man gave you two gifts and here you are whining about getting hurt! Yegods, woman - you're blind.

Gyne exam, Pill, condoms, lube and a comely willing male - all you need. Get busy!

You have received excellent insight and recommendations, above; however, I do believe that for the logical flow of information that I would move the information in Ducy's post down one reply.

[quote=Ducy][COLOR="blue">Get on the pill.[/COLOR]

...or some other form of highly reliable form of contraceptive.

[COLOR="blue">He wears a condom[/COLOR]

And in addition to each of you looking out for and protecting yourselves individually, the two of you should as a partnership also use a third method, that being a spermicide.

[COLOR="blue">You guys screw like rabbits.[/COLOR]

If you are really concerned about the possibility of pregnancy, then learn when your fertile days are and hold off having intercourse on those days + a few days before -- learn how many by reading up on Natural Family Planning. I agree that no one form of contraception is 100% effective and this is why couples should triple up in order to further minimize the possibility. Add this fourth method is just one more layer of protection.
[COLOR="blue">
I've narrowed it down to those 3 simple steps. [/COLOR][/quote]

To which I have embellished somewhat for your peace of mind.

> My logic is that sexual intercourse has the primary reason of producing offspring.

If true then I infer from your statement that fooling around and making out ending with intercourse would not happen often if at all as a way to express the love each of you has for the other. I believe the priorities have shifted since the advent of the pill so that couples are now free to make love as often as desired for the primary reason being that it is indeed the outward expression of their love.

> I see foreplay (ie. Manual stimulation and oral sex) as "natures contraception". E.g. it is a means of satisfying a biological lust within without brining the complications and/or the possibility of pregnancy that sex brings. This considered, I don't want to have sex, I want to make love. I guess what I am saying is I would only have sex with someone that I would not completely freak at the idea of having kids with them. Make sense?

Yes! We are on the same page with our reasoning. Now, all you have to decide upon is how many layers of protection are going comfort you in order to make love worth making.

Please read the articles listed in the Index found at the top right of the main screen. In particular, please read the information on birth control. There are pills and there are pills. One or more may prove to be more compatible with a woman's system than another, so some experimentation may be required.

Pills are not the only form of highly reliable birth control. Talk to your doctor about IUDs, diaphragm, sponge, etc. You may or may not decide to use one of the other choices. Knowledge is empowering and this is why I would like you to have this discussion and to also read each of the articles listed in the Index.

> So I guess I go back to just oral???

"Foreplay" consists of oral stimulation and manual stimulation. Each is fantastic, together, they are an awesome dynamic duo! (Nuf said. ;) )

> we didn't we didn't use a condom the whole time, and I know this is crazily stupid! ..it was somehow soooo much better without, but even considered, is not worth the risk I took, and worry I went through after! ip.Will certainly not do that again until I'm on the pill, and in a secure relashionship.

Use more lubrication. Add lube to the exterior of the condom for a smoother softer action. If necessary, add lube in the vagina, also. See if this makes it "soooo much better"!

-doc

[QUOTE=springfever;275364]E.g. it is a means of satisfying a biological lust within without brining the complications and/or the possibility of pregnancy that sex brings. This considered, I don't want to have sex, I want to make love. I guess what I am saying is I would only have sex with someone that I would not completely freak at the idea of having kids with them. Make sense? [/quote]
Yes, that makes sense! And you're not alone in this type of thinking either. No contraceptive will protect from pregnancy 100%. From the practical point of view, we chose the contraceptive that we feel suits us best and select criteria our partner should fit, then take the few percent risk. Just like we look right and left before crossing the street and then walk to the other side, even though there's always still a slight chance of being run over. If we wouldn't take precautions, our lives would soon be over. If we wouldn't take risks, our lives would stop as well.

[QUOTE=springfever;275364]I feel like this has made my once rational views completely irrational. [/quote]
Not irrational, it made your views less practical. It's the classic example of more variables coming to play that screw with your reasoning. Still; these new variables are there and can no longer be ignored. It makes reality more complicated (believe me, I know :))

[QUOTE=springfever;275364]Explain: I once had a completely logical explanation now I feel my abstanance is more to do with fear me getting hurt. I also feel my prior reasoning has less value, as I am no longer a virgin; I have already given that away too easily I feel for me not to be my own hypercrite I guess? And thirdly this has a placed a dilema in the "once you pop you can't stop/"a taste of honey" frame. [/quote]
I don't see how losing your virginity makes your reasoning faulty. Like you say yourself: just because the guy ran after, doesn't mean it didn't felt right at the time. So don't worry about that. About the reasons for your current abstinence; when you search your gut-feeling, it usually says it right. That is; you most likely are holding back because of fear of getting hurt more than anything else. To borrow the phrase of another member EEK, this will resolve when the desire overcomes the fear.

[QUOTE=springfever;275364]So I guess I go back to just oral??? I am probably drastically over thinking the situation, I just need to air it. My sex drive is far too high, and my over-analysis far too strong to ever let me be happy I guess? :S lol[/QUOTE]
Over-thinking, yes you most likely are. But really; not an illogical thing to do :) Only when "over" is added it starts to become an unreasonable pain in the ass. Thinking in itself creates consciousness, which is the first step to solutions and change. Seems to me you've arrived at that point. All you have to do is acknowledge you did instead of second-guessing.

I agree with Brandye on first making sure you have the means to protect yourself. Because at the moment the desire overcomes (and I'm sure it will), it's important to come prepared! Ducy suggests the method of contraception with very low pregnancy&STD-risk, even lower when adding a spermicide. Buying the condoms is a minor investment, which I'd encourage you to not over-think. Buy those today and keep a few in your purse! You'll at least have protection against STD's and good protection from pregnancy close at hand wherever you are :)

Mind you that "good" is not excellent, see http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/new-sex/20351-birth-control-failure-rate.... Other additional options of contraception you may like to discuss with your doctor (in fact; for the pill you need to get a recipe anyways ;)) Or go to a woman's health center or center for sexual education, whatever reliable resource is available in your area. There's quite a lot of information on this forum too off course. Find the contraceptive that suits you best. A consciously thinking young woman as you seem to be, I'm sure you'll do fine! Just make sure you won't postpone this search or start over-thinking and running around in circles. If that threatens to happen, there's a board here ready to assist you. Make use of it!

Last but not least; you're not screwed up when it comes to sex. And just because you've lost your virginity doesn't mean you have to go to intercourse with a new guy immediately. Stick to masturbation or other forms of sex with your future lover, for as long as you'd like to. There's no rule that says sex means penetration.

Good luck & have fun!

Get on the pill.

He wears a condom

You guys screw like rabbits.

I've narrowed it down to those 3 simple steps.

Overthinking - a prime example.

First, ensure that you are properly protected from pregnancy, disease or any other issue you may dream up. And, remember that masturbation can solve parts of your stated problem and a vibrator never got anyone pregnant.

Then, go with your desires and feelings. Be honest with yourself and your dealing with men will fall into place.

My point is to NOT 'set the guy up' by giving him ANY reason to expect sex when YOU are NOT going to say YES. If the answer is NO - SAY SO and leave him alone and let him go find someone who WILL say YES.

If you have weird issues re: sex then that's YOUR problem - don't go and make it HIS problem by using him as some sort of tool to 'work it out in your head'.

PLAY FAIR

I've run Spring's clubbing scenario with her friend by the various men in my group. Most would not go back to her place - having already written her off. Mind you, none of them were her friend but all of them are single experienced men.

RR, It is all very well and good to talk about 'getting to know you' and so forth but in the real world men are just as wary as women and lot more judgmental than most women would like to believe. Spring is at the point where she has to decide if she's 'serious' or not. Sorry, but the biology isn't going to wait for her.

Spring - decide what you want, quit with the 'little girl lost' games, and get on with living the life you want to have. Mainly because once you do, life is a LOT more fun!

Ok, fair enough. I can not advice on the do's and dont's in the dating-scene, since I lack knowledge and experience. So I guess it's time for me to step out of this thread.