hey there.
I have to say that I am a christian, and I have made the decision to have sex.
i have had sex and do not regret it at all.
the reason i chose to have sex was because I was ready and I am so inlove with this guy that I wanted to express this love.
you are quite young and i personally think 14 is even to young to think about having sex.
I waited for the person i am in love with and he is the first one i have ever been in love with..
so wait its no rush...

Have sex with her! Don't think about religion. I'm sure you have "sined" befored, so don't worry about that bull****.

This is just absolute nonsense. "I want what I want when I want it" is not good advice, nor, is it helpful to others who come to learn.

That's a toughy, dude, but I've been there done that. How old are you? I grew up believing I'd wait till I was married, but that all went out the window when I got out of my sheltered, strict, religious environment. All of a sudden I was exposed to a lot more views and a lot of them made sense. I struggled with the decision for six months and finally realized I was waiting until I was married because I wanted it to be with someone I cared deeply about. But the actual wedding or formal marrying of a couple doesn't, IMO, make them any more of a real loving couple than before the ceremony. You should be just as committed before the wedding as after, and if that personal committment is what you're looking for in that sexual connection, why require a binding legal contract to make each feel good (I don't mean just physically)?

It sounds like you two are still pretty low-key in your sexual activities, so do go slowly. It will be more enjoyable in the long run. Talk about having sex and why you want to take that step; you've got to be able to communicate with your partner. It does complicate everything, at least in a real give-take relationship.

Good luck :)

Edit: I just read that you're 14. I made this decision at 19, so if you're waffling on the religious aspect now, you have long road ahead of you. Do you have a "cool" adult you can talk to one-on-one, like a big brother or uncle or coach?

While I am without faith, you should not allow others to convince you to do things that go against your own personal beliefs. If you personally believe in your religion, and sex is against it, then don't do it. If you don't personally believe in your religion, do what you feel is right.

You are quite young and I don't know which faith you are devoted to. Are ALL acts of sex against your religion? There's plenty to do without having intercourse, and all of it feels good.

And an orgasm from just fooling around fully clothed? I'm envious :) Women must still be such a rush for you. You have so many 'first times' to look forward to, don't rush it.

I would like to recomend that you visit this board: www.themarriagebed.com. It has the 'other' side of this debate: a lot of reasons to wait, why Christianity often teaches abstinance before marriage, and many other good things. This is an extremely difficult decision which I have also been wrestling with for a long time. I have begun to have sex with my fiance, but I am still uncomfortable and confused as to whether it is the right thing to be doing. I wish you good luck in figuring this out with your girlfriend, and blessings. (Edit: I just realized that this post sort of assumes you are Christian. If am mistaken, please forgive, and still good luck and blessings!)

I agree with stranger. Have sex, its a great experience that no bs rule in religion should limit.

You are 14 years old. I hate to seem lame, but you can't even drive a car yet and I do not think that at your age you're really mature enough to deal with the decision to become sexually active. It may seem lame now to abstain but in the future you'll really appreciate that your first time was with some one you really loved and that you didn't have to worry about your parents grounding you from your X-box when they found out that you decided to do the nasty with your girlfriend.

The marriage goal is admirable but unless that really means something then I would suggest setting a more reasonable one like say your 18th birthday. But you also need to respect your girl. Reputation is all that a girl has some times and being seen as a slut is not fun. :(

Just remember to use protection if you do choose to pursue sexual activity. Get some condoms and see if your girlfriend would get on the pill. Fourteen is young for sex and being a father:(

[QUOTE=SexySass69;156305]You are 14 years old. I hate to seem lame, but you can't even drive a car yet and I do not think that at your age you're really mature enough to deal with the decision to become sexually active. It may seem lame now to abstain but in the future you'll really appreciate that your first time was with some one you really loved and that you didn't have to worry about your parents grounding you from your X-box when they found out that you decided to do the nasty with your girlfriend.

The marriage goal is admirable but unless that really means something then I would suggest setting a more reasonable one like say your 18th birthday. But you also need to respect your girl. Reputation is all that a girl has some times and being seen as a slut is not fun. :(

Just remember to use protection if you do choose to pursue sexual activity. Get some condoms and see if your girlfriend would get on the pill. Fourteen is young for sex and being a father:([/QUOTE]

I agree that 14 is a bit young, but the way you put it sex at 14 might as well be a 10 year old banging a prostitute and having 3 kids. From the sounds of your post you do sound to young for sex, but its your decision and whatever you choose its not going to stop the earth from spinning.

You can have sex but you might regret it, i think your first encounter with sex should be your best, (but im a virgin so i dont no) if she realy means alot to you do it if you want to.

I say wait what you described is dry humping or grinding and is a fun thing to do as a substitute. at 14 that is a step that you don't want to take yet I am not persoanlly religeous and if we want to get religeous about it go read the lesser considered of the two stories of creation of manking where god says to man multiply and rule the earth nothing mentioned about marriage there. I think from say 17 and up sex is ok (well to be strict you should wait until you can support a hypothetical child) but I beleive that you should really be involved with the girl as it is just not a one night stand thing it should be the ultimate development of your relationship.

its against my religion but i had sex on my 15th b-day cause she was hot n i loved her

Give her time, you cant truly feel love until you make it, she will see that or she will just get to ****in gaggin for her own good, just let her know your fine with wateva, just warm your wrist up

keep your morals, keep your religion. theres tons of other things you can do taht feel just as good as sex, sometimes better.

ive had sex, and im catholic.
it was a problem for a little while for me, but i guess i loosened up on myself. if its such a problem and its a verable that you think is such an issue, than i would say do what you think is right,.

talk to her. if theres even a slight problem with taking the plunge, you can always wait. theres always another day.

yes 14 is young but just to give an idea how old are you baberules ?

[QUOTE=SexySass69;156957]And then when you are the father of a child that you can't support and you feel jaded because you gave up your spirituality, call up Sirene and ask him if he'll pay your child support and foot the bill for your therapy.[/QUOTE]

Balls!
Just use a condom! DUH!!

Say to religion "go to hell". It's just trying to control you and the rest of humanity.
Do what feels good & dont feel guilty.
Religion tries to stop our basic human urges, dont go against evolution. Have sex & let it feel amazing.

And then when you are the father of a child that you can't support and you feel jaded because you gave up your spirituality, call up Sirene and ask him if he'll pay your child support and foot the bill for your therapy.

I would like to repeat myself, and hopefully clarify: the decision of whether or not to have sex is HUGE, particularly when it goes against a religion that may be precious to you. I don't have advice as to what you should do except: follow your heart and let it guide you. If you believe in your religion, and in God, pray. I prayed for months trying to come to a decision about my own sexuality, and finally came to the conclusion that I was ready, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. But religion can be comforting, guiding, helpful, and provide the greatest support and feeling of love available to you, and I would like to ask others on the board to respect that. Sirene, while I can respect that you do not feel drawn toward religion, it is an important and precious part of many people's lives. It deserves respect for the good that it does.

In no other area of our lives does society condone IGNORANCE. Here we see the outcome. This kid knows more about skateboards than he does about the basic functioning of the human body. On the one hand it is 'so special' and on the other 'its dirty' - no wonder the kid is confused! Your 'spirituality does not lie between your legs. If he waits until marriage and so does she - yeah - the blind leading the blind there - what fun. Of course you'll say wonderful things about it but you don't really know since you have no basis upon which to make a comparison.

All that being said - hey, guy! You are too young yet to have sex. When you are no longer confused - then, maybe. I suggest you read everything you can get your hands on that deals with the subject making sure that your choices range from "The Ethical Slut" to religious text and discussions of your faith. Study up and then think about it.

Hurray for Sirene!!

hehe well I persoanlly am not religeous but still you are a bit you but use this time as kitty said to get your self an education about yourself you'll never find a good mate to marry one day unless you shop around