So, here is the story. I am a 21 year old virgin and my girlfriend really wants to have sex. When we were fooling around, she bluntly said, "All I want do right now is have sex." I told her I didn't have a condomn on me. That was enough to fend her off for one night, but I know very soon (probably this weekend) she will want to have sex.
Now here is the thing. She asked me whether or not I was a virgin and I well...I lied. Yes, yes I know I should have been honest with her, but you should have heard how she asked me. It wasn't just an innocent question, she said, "You are not a virgin are you?" and after I responded, I asked what if I was. I kinda tried to play it off as a joke. I hope she didn't see right through me, but she said, "Well, I wouldn't want to have sex with a virgin"
After, we fooled around, she seemed convinced that I knew what I was doing and to her it will be just a matter of time before we have great, wild sex. I am pretty experienced in fooling around and even giving and receiving oral and fingering. However, I have never actually had sexual intercourse.
My main concern is not everything before sex. I know what I am doing when it comes to that. I am worried that I will climax too soon and my cover will be blown. Its like this huge moment of awkwardness is looming on the horizon. Is there ANYTHING I can do to avoid it??? And please don't tell me, to tell her the truth. It might not seem like a big deal to some people, but she is a very sexual person and I can definitely see this breaking up our relationship.
Now, something that encourages me is that I usually take a long time to cum when masterbuting and a girl has never made me cum giving oral or hand jobs. Yet, from everything I have read, one cums within seconds the first time they have sex. That would of course be a disaster. I just want to last a few minutes and I am willing to do ANYTHING. Perhaps there are some exercises I can do to control my ejaculation or perhaps there are products I can buy to simulate sex. I am open to anything right now.
Thanks for your help,
Desperate
> My main concern is not everything before sex. I know what I am doing when it comes to that.
I cordially invite you to challenge your knowledge bank by reading all the chapters in this Sticky thread:
INTERCOURSE / ORGASMS / and the gentle art of Humping
> She asked me whether or not I was a virgin and I well...I lied. Yes, yes I know I should have been honest with her, but you should have heard how she asked me.
It does not matter. Honesty is best and I know you will be in the future.
> she said, "Well, I wouldn't want to have sex with a virgin"
She needs a head's up wake up call to her sex education by reading the last chapter in the above link as a minimum. (Be sure to read it, first, before recommending she read it if you decide that she can benefit from this knowledge.)
> I am worried that I will climax too soon and my cover will be blown. Its like this huge moment of awkwardness is looming on the horizon. Is there ANYTHING I can do to avoid it?
You very well might. P E is the bane of most teenagers and guys thru their mid twenties. Please read this thread:
Squeeze & Training Exercise for Controling Premature Ejaculation
> And please don't tell me, to tell her the truth. It might not seem like a big deal to some people, but she is a very sexual person and I can definitely see this breaking up our relationship.
Oh, it is a big deal; however, you must realize that a successful relationship is also based upon the interpersonal properties existing between you other than sex. If she is so simplistic as to judge the worth and merit of your relationship just on this one aspect, she is very superficial and you two would probably break up sooner than later, anyway.
> Now, something that encourages me is that I usually take a long time to cum when masterbuting and a girl has never made me cum giving oral or hand jobs. Yet, from everything I have read, one cums within seconds the first time they have sex. That would of course be a disaster.
OH YEE OF LITTLE FAITH~
If you believe this then how the heck did everyone before you get through this awkward period of adjustment only to nurture a loving relationship?
Here is one more link I am including for your consideration:
How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?
After reading all the information, above, if you have more questions, please read other relavent Sticky posts found at the top of the Forums that may answer your concerns.
After reading all the information, above, if you have questions, comments, or concerns, please write to me.
* You are not alone
* You are not the only person to experience any of these things
* You are in the right place to get help
* You are going to be followed by many other people coming up
through the ranks behind you
* All is not hopeless
* You are going to find, like everybody else, that sex has its rough
spots as the two of you learn and acquire compatibility. All will not
go perfectly well and it is foolish to expect that it will or can
Relax in this knowledge and insight and enjoy the "ride".
-Doc
I say you too are not well matched she expects you to not be a virgin ? who the hell does she think she is ?
Does your girlfriend always treat you this insensitively? Trust me, this is not something you will be able to hide. I once dated a guy who tried to hide it; he tried to be all cool and confident about how he knew what he was doing, etc. He'd make some statement about sex and when we hit that point it was clear he had no idea, a bit of guidance helped. I never said anything, months later he told me the truth and I just said "I knew" and wanted to see how long until you fessed up.
I guess I am hoping to get some answers. Does anyone think I can do this? In retrospect, I guess I had to give a hard thrust to enter into her. Does the fact that I do not cum after getting hand jobs and oral sex make anyone believe that I wouldn't come within seconds after beginning sex? Perhaps, I can still pull this off.
Thank you for reading and sorry that this was so long.
oh dear first you turn your nose up at our comments and then tell an appaling story say what the hell are you doing but make things worse and worse you say all you wanted to do was go home yet there you were trying to have sex to upkeep your rep/pride/manlines or hevean knows what else.
[QUOTE=clevelandrocks;172719]Does the fact that I do not cum after getting hand jobs and oral sex make anyone believe that I wouldn't come within seconds after beginning sex? Perhaps, I can still pull this off.
Thank you for reading and sorry that this was so long.[/QUOTE]
Before my first time I was the same way, never came from oral or hj.... my first time lasted less than 20 seconds.
I'm going to have to say you should fess up.
And think to yourself, do you really want to lose your virginity to someone who seems to look down on you for it?