ok..right to the point.i've gone out on some dates with this woman and we recently had sex. here's the deal... she tells me that she doesn't orgasm during sex, at all; and that kind of bothers me. i don't think she's even comfortable with me using my fingers. i'm a passionate guy and expect the same in return. this just isn't what i expected. any advice? thanks.
M
The first thing you should read is the chick chat thread about [URL=http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/brandye_s_chick_chat/15353-female_sexual... Sexual Response. Remember that Chick Chat is a women-only discussion area so don't post in that thread.
I have a problem making my girlfriend wet when I finger her. You see, i'm not below her, if you know what i mean, when I am fingering her. My head is where her head is and I try to finger her, but it is quite difficult. Her clothes are on, but the pants are un-done. I can get probably half of my middle finger in, but she can get all of her's in. I would try and go below her, but both Her and I are afraid of our parents walking in. I think i'm positioning my hand wroung. Yet, even when I am in real deep, and I move up and down really fast on her G-spot, I get tired VERY quickly. Is there something I can do to go faster and last longer? She says when I do last, it feels really good though.
I tried to explain it the best i can, any advice would be great. Thank you.
sounds like a familiar problem i had when i first fingered my ex.
if you are on a bed, try to make it where she is higher up. (as in, her head is higher up on the bed then you.) like this:
[URL=http://imageshack.us]
now of course, you could be on the right side, depending on how you finger her and all. that is just a 10min. drawing of mine. being farther down on the bed allows you to have your arm closer to her crotch area, which in turn should give you a better position to finger her
also, dude, work out your arms or whatever gets tired, so you can go and rub her g spot the way she likes it :)
only thing i can think of to make you go faster and longer would be to find a place with better privacy so you can be in the right area at the right time.
one thing i must ask, before i finish editing...how old are you hand of death?
now, as for mister, have you talked to her about your problem and how to fix it/how she feels? communication is the key to success. no communication= no consideration and no consideration= no relation.
First of all, thank you very much.
I am sixteen. As for the communicating business, she says "Not to worry about it." She tells me that she has problem orgasming anyways when she masterbates. I just want to make her wet and feel good. That was a very good tip and thank you again.
By the way, I realised the communication thing was for Mister, i'd just thought maybe you would get a better idea if i told you. And its not my arm that gets tired, its the finger going up and down, she likes it very fast and very hard. I'll do curls on my middle finger or something. Thanks again.
hehe, thank you :)
just make sure the door is closed ;) and..practice pulling your hand out of something quick. :p
o yeah, another idea. (this worked for me because of the events that occured that day, we just got back from a theme park and things like that, so everyone was a little tired) have her put a blanket over her (comforter, blankets on her bed, on her entire body, like if you went to sleep.) and then slip your hand under it. since you have the covers on top, i think you might be able to slip her garments off a bit to allow more movement and ability.
and, the guy should want to please the girl he likes/loves. problem for me was that if i told her i wanted to do something to please her, we would end up arguing because i wanted to do things for her instead of for me! :p
Yeah, the door is always closed. Plus, there is always a blanket over her. We've done it twice, so she should be pretty comfortable now, so i'll start taking her pants off a little for more movement and mobility, like you said.
Eventually, i'll start doing it below her, which will make her feel better. She has a neighbor next door who is mad rich and has about ten houses (no joke...sense he has ten houses, he is literally never home. Plus, you can tell if he is home by the car in the front drive-way, because he doesn't park it in the garage) who has a trampoline. Maybe i'll take her out there at night ;). There would be less stress of her parents catching us.
So yeah, thanks again.
:rolleyes: :rolleyes:
champloo.... she and i have discussed it to a certain extent. she just doesn't orgasm during sex.we're still at the point where we're trying to figure out what we both like and appreciate during sex. i know that i have a higher sex drive then she does....do i just come right out and say that? i know she feels like shes not where she would like to be during sex
Can she bring herself to orgasm through masturbation?
You don't state her age, but it's useful to note that young women have a hard time reaching orgasm. That may not help you in solving the problem, but it means that you have to treat it more like a fact than a flaw.
Be aware that if you start getting frustrated with it it is going to make matters worse for her.
You mention that she's not comfortable with you using fingers, then a comfort level could be an issue. Does she view sex as something dirty? Is she simply not ready for it? To me this sounds like a mental thing.
But that's just what I'm getting out of it.
My girlfriend has troubles reaching an orgasm as well. It's quite difficult for woman to reach it compared to men. She only reaches orgasm by rubbing her clitoris. Only once in her life has she reached orgasm by fingering.
http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/pleasing_her/17112-is_there_anything_i_can_do.html
check out this thread