I am not the most experianced person in the world, Im only 15 but I have some questions. I have always been a very sexual person ever since I can remember. Even at age 7 I was having sexual thoughts. But now, as I'm getting older, I'm finding it harder to have sexual thoughts and be turned on by them. I think it's becuase I have been told its wrong for so long that I have shut myself off from it and its frustrating and confuseing me. As you get older, your sexual imagination is suposed to increase, isnt it?:confused: I have a boyfriend and I want to be able to enjoy our experiances and I dont want him to feel bad, becuase he really does make me happy. Can some please help?
Sun, 05/18/2008 - 17:43
#1
Sexual Thoughts
Thanks for your advice :) and don't worry. Im not having sex yet. Im keeping everything at a comfortable level
If you have had your sexuality repressed as you say, why not replace the dialog in your head with new and different information? It will take some time, and it will also take the right guy in order for there to be the right chemistry; however, in a short period of time you ought to be able to turn this around.
Well so far, i have the right guy for now. Its just the thoughts...Thank you for your advie :)
Try thinking about what stuff really does turn you on and talking them over with your b/f. Maybe you both can make each other rather stimulated from talks about it and performing a little. Use safety in all situations. The greatest stimulation that I know about is when you clear your head of everything else but the person you are with. Focus on the touching, the sensation of each kiss and caress. Know that you are attractive and that he wants to please you in those ways, all of this helps build that excitement and can make you wild.
During the period called adolescence, there are great variations in how we women think about sex and relationships. A backdrop of sexual repression does not help because that puts our hearts and minds on different tracks. We women tend to find romantic thoughts rather than explicitly thoughts more erotic and, ultimately, become ready to turn these fantasies into behaviour. Doc and Bluetide each give good advice. May I add not to rush things. Try their approaches and let your mind and body catch up with the resulting fantasies.
A year or so ago there was a lengthy thread on when we each lost our virginity and how we felt about. An overwhelming number of the women who became active at your age wish they had waited a bit. Our bodies were ready long before our emotions were.
The feeling
Everything your were taught about sex is WRONG. This was done to keep you and your thoughts under control by others. Your job now is to learn to control yourself. First thing to do is to get rid of the mental baggage as in what you were taught.
Go here: http://www.iep.utm.edu/s/sexualit.htm
Then go here: http://www.wickedwomangroup.us/
In addition : read ALL of the Sticky Posts on this site here. Lots of good stuff!