Long awaited arrival....

[Hiddencandle]

*deep breath*

I am a virgin...an over 30 virgin...there I've said it.

For various reasons (religious beliefs, timing, partner choice, lack of partner) I have not actually had intercourse. I've been active in just about any other way, but not actually gone the full way. LOL it is amazing how fast the time flies.

Gradually this has become just a part of my life...but now I'm in a relationship with someone and want to be completely and fully intimate with my boyfriend. I am rather concerned about telling him...as well as concerned about crossing this line so far down the line. I know why I haven't gone that far, and I'm comfortable with how my life has been.

Wondering if anyone has had this experience..and has some advice. I guess I'm just scared about his reaction (you just can't anticipate how someone is going to react to that kind of news...I've had a couple of experiences with former partners with whom I didn't want to take that step where they've been sensitive until I've said not that far...and then they've turned to mocking and laughter).

Well there you go...a rarity these days I think...lol...but with someone who finally makes me feel like this is a step I want to take...

Thanks

[Brandye]

One, no need to tell unless that makes you comfortable
Two, if someone mocks you for that, you are better off going no further.
Three, you have been true to yourself and your feelings for thirty years. No reason to stop now. Be real, be natural, be you. If some "he" does not like that, he has a problem.

A rarity? Perhaps, but I have seen women in the same situation who have the same questions and are in my office to learn the how-to's of performance and protection. Yes, fifty percent of all women start sexual activity between their 18th and 20th birthdays but there are a susprising number who keep seeking their values and ideals.

[Hiddencandle]

*smile*

Thank you for that...I guess I'm just concerned I'll give myself away..LOL. Somethings are hard to fake I guess. (I don't have a good poker face)
Looking forward to this relationship going to that next level.
*wicked grin*

I've been perusing the forum and the site, finding it very useful and inspiring

Keep up the good work!

[kiwigirl]

I know how you feel. I lost my virginity after I turned twenty and that was with a guy I'd been seeing and sleeping with for about three months, as we both felt we were ready. Sure we fooled around but he was gentle and understanding and that made it much more special for me when we finally had sex. It was almost ten years later that I had intercourse again, this time with a guy who I'd know for a while and had chatted to and the expectation and the reality of us finally after all those years of wondering and he knew that I'd only been with one other man in my life, was a let down for both of us but mainly me. I felt like a failure and a disappointment but I had friends who I could talk to and gained reasurance from them.
Good luck in what ever you decide on how to take you relationship.