Couple questions about sex!!!

[NimbleDimble]

I have P.E (I ejaculate within the first couple seconds of sex). I want to please my Girlfriend.. I know the Squeeze Technique but I don't really want to tell her about my problem yet. Currently I was wearing a condom and would ejaculate within the first couple seconds and would just keep going and would get "Semi" hard and go for another 15 minutes straight to the next ejaculation. The problem is if we switch positions or I pull out in that 15 minutes then it's not fully hard and I can't get it to go back in. People have told me to just let her give me "Head" or whatever to get me to ejaculate and then have sex but if I can't get fully hard again then it will just aggravate us both. We want to have a baby but if I don't use a condom then our sex is going to last 5 seconds and there is nothing I can do to keep going or anything because she will obviously know because there will be semen everywhere.

Is there anything I can do to last a little bit longer without doing the squeeze technique?

What about desensitizing sprays? Do they work? Where can I get them?

If I ejaculate during foreplay what do I have to do to get fully hard or be able to get into her vagina after that?

Thanks for the support.

[sexyand17]

really dude i have the same problem. Seems 3 thrusts your out kinda thing..........well thats the saying i get every time i fuck my girl. Well i really have no answer for your question other then the squeeze technique is way to hard to do if your not practicing every day. I would suggest working on just keepin it up after the oral cuz its way better to get sucked off and cum and keep it hard cuz the bj will last twice as long to keep you hard and then you get to use it again. If im wrong someone tell me but other then that I really think thats the best way to go.

[dancingdoc2]

Welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy participating. Please begin by reading the FAQs, the Posting Guidelines section, and to both of you fellas--please browse the Index, all found at the top of the main screen. One of the articles listed is this one:

Squeeze & Training Exercise for Controlling Premature Ejaculation

Sexyand17 >> Well i really have no answer for your question other then the squeeze technique is way to hard to do if your not practicing every day.

I do not understand why you believe this to be the case. If applied correctly (to the base of the penis or at the junction of the shaft and Corona clamping down against the urethra) and with moderate pressure, the urge to ejaculate is thwarted after a few seconds. "Sexy", you've been a member of the community for a while now, I'm surprised you have not found the article and read about and put the exercise described into practice. Furthermore, the third technique to squelch the urge to climax too soon is to masturbate shortly before getting romantic.**

NimbleDimble > I don't really want to tell her about my problem yet.

This is just your "fragile male ego" getting in the way of progress.* When will it ever be the right time? Making love should be a partnership, it is not what you do to each other; it is what we do with and for each other as a team.

If the two of you believe you have been dealt a bunch of "lemons', then turn them into "lemonade". The Squeeze technique is not something you do; it is what is done for you by your partner. Using the technique described in the article is not what you do, it is what is done with your participation.

> The problem is if we switch positions or I pull out in that 15 minutes then it's not fully hard and I can't get it to go back in. People have told me to just let her give me "Head" or whatever to get me to ejaculate and then have sex but if I can't get fully hard again then it will just aggravate us both.

People are correct as far as their advice goes. Erections come and erections go, seemingly having a mind of their own. So you (partially) loose your erection, no big deal. If not out, then pull out, and let her work on you with body caresses as well as a hand job and/or what I refer to as the "dynamic duo)--oral in combination with a h/j. You may find that you need to pause and let your body recoup for a few minutes before attempting to rebuild your erection; however, more often than not it will return and you can go on, repeating this procedure over and over if necessary during the session.

Even if you loose your erection and are unable to build it back, you can still have an orgasm. An erection is not a requirement except for intercourse. Worrying about being able to regain an erection causes another condition known as Performance Anxiety (PE). The more you worry about it the worse it becomes. So, quite literally the fix it to stop worrying. (I know, easier said than done, yet this is the accepted remedy.)

The two of you and others reading this over your shoulders must not be so self critical and hard on yourselves. You cannot demand or will an erection. What you can do is work together and one way to do this is to let her stroke your penis immediately or after a short break or to incorporate the Dynamic Duo along with other caresses with her free hand. Most women enjoy watching a flaccid penis grow into a large erect one. You can bank on this, so let her do her thing so the two of you can get back to business and pleasure.

> We want to have a baby but if I don't use a condom then our sex is going to last 5 seconds and there is nothing I can do to keep going or anything because she will obviously know because there will be semen everywhere.

And if you use a condom, no semen will enter her vagina. A lot of good this rationale is.

> What about desensitizing sprays? Do they work?

Yes, they do work, although they can desensitize the entrance of her vagina that is richly endowed with sensitive nerve endings. Better me thinks to nip this at the source--by utilizing the methodology described in the exercise (that takes the two of you working together to master! )

* Much better me knows to stop hiding and let her know you have this condition that nearly every other young fella up to his mid to late twenties suffers from at one time or another and make the solutions part of the play. You'll be much happier. Mastering the exercise can be fun. Using the Squeeze when appropriate is NBD when applied as part of your ongoing make out session.

> If I ejaculate during foreplay what do I have to do to get fully hard or be able to get into her vagina after that?

** I provided the solution, above, by telling you that enjoying a climax (by masturbation) before making love and intercourse WILL slow you down. We all have a period of time that varies from individual to individual in which we cannot climax and have to wait it out. This is referred to as the "Refractory Period". It might last from a few minute or more than likely from ten to thirty. Once your body recovers, you are good to go, again, and possibly, yet again.

That your climax occurred right in the middle of making love only means that you will have to wait out the full "down time" in the middle of making love. If so, no harm no foul: Keep the fires burning by continuing to make out. It really is just this simple. This is what you would do if the two of you wanted to prolong your lovemaking session, each enjoying multiple orgasms over the course of the day/evening.

Now, to both of you: please work with your girlfriend and make her part of the solution. Make love together. Explore and learn together. Making love is serious business; however, you should not be so serious about doing it. Lighten up.

[dlb]

Many, probably most ,young men cum quickly during sex. The flip side of that coin is that they also tend to be able to recover and obtain another erection quickly, or they simply retain their erections after ejaculation.

Much can be learned by observing the way your body behaves after orgasm during masturbation. If you stay erect after a masturbatory orgasm you can and will after fellation or coitus. Also see how long it takes to get hard again after ejaculation.

One thing you need to realize is that the more turned on you get your woman the sooner she is likely to reach orgasm during coitus.

If you are involved in coitus and reach orgasm, continue thrusting. That may be all that is needed for her to climax too. Relax. You might stay hard and be able to continue. If not, don't stop working on her. Continue kissing and caressing and performing cunnilingus. You will probably get hard again soon

The squeeze technique-works for some, but not all. Whenever I tried it it just pushed me over the edge to come.

You might find you have more success with the grunt technique- stop thrusting momentarily if orgasm is impending. GRunt and use the same muscles as if you were trying to pass a rather difficult turd. This will relax the muscles related to ejaculation including the pubococcygeus muscle which you do not want to be tensed up if you are trying to delay.
Practice this technique often during masturbation. You may find that you can eventually ejaculate independently of orgasm. This relieves the pressure in your prostate and allows you to continue thrusting considerably longer.
If during coitus you partner asks what the grunting is about tell her. She shouldn't mind-and if she does...screw her!

Try not to worry about how long you take to come while you are actually in the act. This will only make control more difficult.
Don't forget to give her lots of attention during foreplay, during coitus and during afterplay.

One more thing to remember. As men get older they begin to take longer to reach orgasm yet women, as they get older, begin to reach orgasm more quickly in general. SO it only gets better!

[NimbleDimble]

Thanks for all the responses guys here is the update:

I usually give her one or two orgasms before I even start intercourse. I got her G-spot and clitoris on lockdown so to say lol. It takes maybe 15-20 minutes to give her 2 orgasms then I go in. I cum pretty quickly but I have kinda trained myself to stay hard and I go until the next one. It's pretty messy considering I'm not wearing a condom and she is leaking liquids everywhere. Towels aren't even worth using it goes right threw them there is so much. All in all were happy =D