is there something wrong with me and/or him?

[pyrogirl77]

Anyone is free to answer this male or female. I just figured I would put it on the male board since it "seems" to be a him problem. So on with the questions:

My boyfriend and I have been having sex for about 7 months now. We were both each other's first. Ever since I moved in with him (about 2 months ago) I've been noticing a difference in our sex life. A few times he's not been able to keep an erection. Then a couple times he'll keep the erection for up to 30 minutes after he's came. Is any of this normal and I'm just so new to sex that I don't know it or is there a problem?

Second question, I seem to be more in the mood than he does. He won't be tired or anything but when I try to start some action with him he just looks at me and says that he's not in the mood. For the past few weeks he's done this several time. Now, I understand him not being in the mood once in a whie but I mean seriously, he's a guy. I shouldn't have a stronger sex drive than him. Is there something wrong with me? Does he just not find me sexy any more or is he bored?

Any answers will be appreciated.

[sexy_angel]

there are women with stronger sex drives than men....it also depends on your ages

[pyrogirl77]

we're both 20

[dancingdoc2]

Does your boyfriend have a controlling personality?

Sounds to me like he may just have you where he wants you. He "worked" to get you to move in and now that you have, he either thinks he doesn't have to put any more time, effort, and energy, into the relationship; or, that he does not recognize or perhaps care about your needs. I'm just throwing this out as food for thought. I don't have any answers, except to say that his behavior or attitude is not unheard of.

[Blackweb]

Moving in can cause a lot of problems, especially with the sex life.

I've found that more often than not, a bad relationship makes for bad sex, while a good relationship leads to good sex. At least from my own experiences, moving in with a partner can change the relationship dynamics tremendously, and often not in good ways

Having no place to escape from each other on bad days, seeing each other a great deal more often, it kind of kills the thrill of seeing someone and that will have a definate effect on the sex life...

[EvilEvilKitten]

You have discussed it and all he can say is he's not in the mood? Okay.
And he does this a couple of times each week?

Possible causes: 1. he's controlling, 2. he's feeling his territory's been encroached upon. 3. he's bored, tired, complasiant.

The cure for all the above: be absent for a period of time without warning and without apology or explanation. You do not have to make a big deal about it - just not be there.

If this does not work - he doesn't realise that he could lose you at any given moment and should therefore pay attention and get a clue - then sorry, but it it over between you two. You have 'stepped up' (by trying to dicuss this) and he hasn't.

[SexTherapy]

by EvilEvilKitten>1. he's controlling, 2. he's feeling his territory's been encroached upon.

What does controlling and feeling territory has been encroached upon? He feels like your cheating and he controlling sex drive?

I think i answered own question.