hey
im not a virgin, and i havent been for a few months, but my boyfriend and i dont have sex very often (you may have read my other posts about how i dont like that fact lol..) the thing is that everytime he initially like gets inside me it hurts like crazy. i dont get it. after hes inside its fine.. and i am wet when he trys to get in... but it still hurts so bad that it feels like its my first time all over again, sometimes i think maybe im too small for him, but at the same time if that was the case then it wouldnt feel so good when it got inside... and it would hurt more when he pulls out. am i just too tense? i really dont know what to do or why this is a persistant problem.
thanks
jo:cool:
Jo,
Hmmmmm. You may want to see a doctor about this if it continues. My gf and I had similar problems to what you describe for first ... 7-8 yrs of our relationship (I was her first sexual partner). I felt bad for hurting her, she felt guilty for my feeling bad, until she decided to consult. She had a condition called "vestibulite" (term is French, can't tell whether it's the same in English), of which I don't know full details (I was working away from home when she consulted). Problem was essentially on the external part of the vagina (vulva/lips?), and she had to have day surgery to remove some small piece of flesh. Though we had always enjoyed each other's lovemaking, this introduced both of us to a totally new world of pleasure, untainted by anxiety - even after so many years together! Good luck.
hmm that might be it. i tried searching and i cant find anything in english, thats not good. lol. oh well. i guess i should get it checked out. i just find it so weird that its fine once he is inside me.. just getting him in is so painful
Yes, your description of it sounds terribly familiar. Sorry u have to go through this every time. If you allow a personal suggestion (... not leaving you much choice tho :p ) : don't wait 7-8 years ... (we almost split back then bcse of built-up frustrations!)
Jo,
I believe I may have found the corresponding word in English : "vaginismus". I quickly read thru a website site with info and it did sound like it. Try the following :
http://www.vaginismus.com/?gclid=CPvCg7aEuYgCFSZmYwodY14y-g
Good luck.
omg!!!! that is exactly it. I thought i was a freak.. or something was wrong. Because my ex and I tried to have sex on numerous occasions but it just wouldn't work. My friends were like.. well was he up? And i was like yes.. it just wouldnt work. He couldnt get in. I thought that maybe it was just a weird omen that we shouldnt have sex. lol. Oh wow. Thank you so much for bringing this to my attention.
Jo,
Really glad if this is of help. I kinda know the feeling (mind you from the receiving end, but still). Feel free to PM if you have more ... specific questions. I can try and get info for you from gf. Go well!