A few have suggested “sex during pregnancy” as a topic. It is a good one. I can only advise from a medical perspective as I have no children. My partner is a mid-wife and is the mother of a teen aged boy. I see pregnant patients every day.
Medically, there is no reason to abstain from sex during pregnancy. This assumes a normal pregnancy with no history of miscarriages or difficult pregnancies. In either of those cases, talk to your doctor because advice over the internet is inappropriate.
Women, and men, react to pregnancy very individually. Some women become more interested in sex and actually increase their activity during pregnancy. Others cannot stand the thought of sex. There are both physical and psychological reasons for these reactions. The hormones are changing and this sets off the different desires. Yesterday I saw two pregnant women. One said, “Thank God I am pregnant, now I won’t to have to contend with sex for nine months.” The other said, “I am pregnant and horny as hell.”
In addition to the hormones causing a direct change in sex drive, the chemistry of the vagina changes. There is increased blood flow to the lower pelvis and many women have increased drainage of what normally would be the lubrication produced during sexual arousal. Some women find this distention and draining uncomfortable and others find it stimulating. Not unlike with menstrual sex, some of us like it better and some cannot even think about it.
A pattern that is often seen is during the first trimester (morning sickness, swelling and tenderness of breasts, general discomfort) sex is not desired. After the early symptoms pass, a normal frequency is resumed and the middle trimester often yields a normal sex life. The third trimester is characterized by the discomfort of increased weight, decreased mobility and a generally crowded condition in there. Some women would simply rather not continue sex; others, need to find some creative positions.
Throughout pregnancy, the missionary position with the man on top becomes less comfortable. For the first six months, female superior positions are preferred. During the third trimester, this becomes hard on the knees and may not be comfortable for either partner. A good position has the woman on her back so that she can relax and not be supporting excess weight. By draping her legs over the man (on his side), neither partner is placing undue weight or pressure on the other. This position also makes the woman’s genitals accessible to either one for additional stimulation. I really like this position because I can stimulate myself while feeling the man inside me and usually have an orgasm with him in me. That is even while not pregnant! Because of the changing shape of the lower belly, this additional stimulation may be very desirable, even necessary, for the woman who still has the urge.
There is a common old wives’ tale regarding the danger of orgasm during pregnancy. In a healthy woman with a normal pregnancy, the orgasm offers no threat. Most of the muscle contractions during orgasm are not the uterus. The sphincters provide most of the contraction and the exterior anal sphincter is the strongest and most powerful muscle involved. That is one reason that many of us enjoy anal stimulation during sex – it increases these muscle’s (there are two of them, one essentially inside the other) involvement and enhances the power of the orgasm. I particularly enjoy rimming and can have wonderful orgasms with all the stimulation focused around the anus. During pregnancy, the contraction of this muscle need not change and will do no damage. The biggest problem here will be with the prevalence of hemorrhoids during pregnancy, finger penetration would be uncomfortable.
The urethral sphincters (three of them) and the vaginal sphincters (a whole muscle group) all typically participate in orgasm. These, too, can contract strongly doing no damage. There is record of the uterus, itself, contracting during orgasm but studies of this have yielded mixed results of the importance of uterine contractions. Few women experience decreased orgasmic satisfaction after a hysterectomy. Patients have told me they feel no difference in orgasmic contraction without the uterine contractions. During pregnancy, the uterine contractions will be flutters, if anything, because the muscle is so distended.
Some men are very turned on by a pregnant female body and some find the sight revolting. The male reaction can have a large effect on female response. Too often, each partner tries to ignore the whole thing and we all have heard stories of men straying during pregnancy. They probably would anyway but the pregnancy and the undesirability of the pregnant wife become an excuse. Other men may seek to avoid sexual contact through being overly considerate. For the woman who wants sex, this is frustrating and makes her feel unattractive. At a minimum, these issues need to be talked about. The male libido continues and, even for women who lose interest, it is worth keeping him satisfied. Perhaps this is a good time to recall all the hand techniques we learn as teens – only improve upon them. Perhaps oral, in both directions, will be the most satisfying.
But, do not call off the game because an earlier experience was biologically very successful!!
(posted by the moderator on behalf of Brandye)
It took us almost a year of trying for my wife to get pregnant so we didn't have any sex during that nine months. Between all the changes she was going though , I doubt she had much interest in sex. I was almost a year before we tried have sex again. That was one long freaking year...
I'm 34wks with my 1st Child and I have an insatiable sexual desire ,my husband thinks I'm loosing my mind ,but he does not complain. In my research to understand my feelings ,I realised that there are alot of preggo chics who feel the way I do .
There is no real topic on this site on how to approach Pregnant Sex.
Any preggo chic out there feel the same .....
Read the sticky this is attached to. The one best position is described. Many women feel the same as you.
Thanks Brandye , its seems like preggo chic are afraid to come out with there feelings . LOL !!
yeah i felt the same way u have no idea my man was so tired all the time so i did the work and i didnt care he didnt care we practically read magazines the whole time and hunni u have never had sex until ur me lol i was the horneest girl in the world that was almost ready to pop i dont think anyone could beat me at having sex for 16 and a half hours everyday
If that were written in some understandable language, I may reply but I cannot determine what you are saying. I am fluent in three languages and conversational in a few more but yours is beyond me.
ranslated,she was so horny during her pregnancy that even though her husband was so tired,he let her do what she needed and even though there was times they did alot of reading,they did i for about 16 hours almost every day.
is that possible without him getting of a few times and getting sick of it?
I was reading around would my weight be a problem with sex I'm pretty heavy not like huge but I hear that weight can be hard with sex. I'm just curious
sorry if I didn't see anything like this already
I so just put this in the wrong place. Please ignore, sorry.
KMB,
Excess weight limits what we can do in many ways. With sex, the positions are greatly limited and some ability for response is limited. If both partners are overweight, sometimes vaginal sex is not possible.
Beckeh,
I do nto understand your post in this thread.
My boyfriend is way skinner than me, I don't care though about the weight too much right now.
I can't wait to have sex with him.
I know every pregnancy is different.. I guess mine is a little different than most. I'm 24 weeks pregnant and positions with my boyfriend putting a little pressure on my belly doesn't bother me. It doesn't bother her either. She usually starts kicking away when we're done because mommy is so relaxed and happy.. Its almost as if she's saying, "More, Mommy! More!" Haha.
I understand the whole 'wanting sex all the time' thing too.. or at least some form of sexual contact. Even when I myself don't feel like having intercourse, I'm still horny and usually resort to just playing with my boyfriend's penis. He doesn't complain at all. In fact, he finds it relaxing when I touch him and he's so happy that I'm willing to have sex almost all the time.
Though we have a dilemma. The sex is getting kind of boring. It feels like the same thing over and over again.
I am currently 34 weeks pregnant with my first baby and am going to be induced in 2 weeks because he is actually at his 36 week mark. My whole pregnancy I have been really horny. My husbands thinks I'm crazy and very surprised at the fact that I have so many urges. He works hard all day and comes home really tired at bed time I usually end up "raping" him. (lol, like he calls it).
We have been doing doggy style, riding, oral and on my side but like everyone else has said it gets boring. We started to incorporate things to make it exciting but its getting old... I guess I'm just going to have to wait for it to get to that excitement point again after the baby, huh?
Im 37 weeks pregnant..in the begining fucked like crazy now i dont wanna do it..im gonna do it to try to get labor going but thats it
I am 34 weeks pregnant and I still have sex. The other day my bf and i felt him hit something. Should i be concerned? I went to the doctor and everything seemed fine, but does this definently (sp) mean that we need to stop until the baby is out?
I feel the same way that you do
Just to tend to my curiosity, is it bad for the baby when you have sex? Cause sometimes sex gets a little rough and everything jiggles in a way right?
yes sometimes if you have bleeding or after some period you should. But better to consult a doc. Even you are allowed better to avoid pressure on tummy.
No it's not bad,the baby has lots of protection in the womb,and they actually like the movement.It's only when there are problems with the pregnancy that sex should be avoided.I went into labour at 36wks pregnant with twins.I wanted a little afternoon delight and my husband obliged.Several hours later i felt ill so i had a long shower and went to bed.It was my first pregnancy so i thought something i ate made me sick,but later that night my waters broke and 4 hrs later i'd given birth to my twins a girl & a boy.I was in labour 7.5 hrs before i knew what it was and only another 4 hrs after that.My other two labours weren't as quick 22hrs& 17hrs and i knew from the first twinge what it was.
Thanks, now I know. I always thought you had to avoid sex while being prego. That's only for complications. I'll have to remember this when I'm ready to conceive :)
What are the best sex positions being pregent & trying 2 have an orgasm????
It appears that you did not read the whole thread, Adrian
[QUOTE=IKNOEVERYTHING;185774]yeah i felt the same way u have no idea my man was so tired all the time so i did the work and i didnt care he didnt care we practically read magazines the whole time and hunni u have never had sex until ur me lol i was the horneest girl in the world that was almost ready to pop i dont think anyone could beat me at having sex for 16 and a half hours everyday[/QUOTE]
Am I a snob, or am I antedluvian in my appreciation of language (whichever it may be) or is this perhaps rather discourteous of me. I send maybe three texts per annum but never in this 'lingo'.
Congratulations on your supposed marathon-like sexual stamina.
Get a life!
Mau, maybe it's changed in 3 years LOL!:D
I do very much agree that on forums as these we should use more standard ways of writing (or those foreigners like me won't understand it anymore at some point. And as for my posting: I'm most probably making enough mistakes already! ;))
I can see your appreciation for language. I love languages and the way they transform! I actually very much like English for the great variety and subtle differences in the meaning of words; especially in poetry. But I find text-language quite interesting. Did you know they study text-language and slang just like they do with "normal" language? And that emoticons were actually invented by a teacher at a university? I just smile every year when they've added a few new words to the official dictionary that came from social media and other slang (and some people cheer and other shake their heads in shame).
Btw: the way we write things is at times difficult and seems illogical when it comes to pronunciation. I have this funny poet that shows it, this is a part of it:
"The Chaos" or "A Dutchman's difficulties with the English language"
by Dr. Gerard Nols Trenite (1870-1946)
Dearest creature in creation
Studying English pronunciation,
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse and worse.
I will keep you, Susy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy;
Tear in eye, your dress you’ll tear;
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer,
Pray, console your loving poet,
Make my coat look new, dear, sew it!
Just compare heart, beard and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word.
Sword and sward, retain and Britain
(Mind the latter how it’s written).
Made has not the sound of bade,
Say-said, pay-paid, laid, but plaid.
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as vague and ague,
But be careful how you speak,
Say: gush, bush and break, bleak,
(...) This continues for a few pages! :)
Don’t you think so, reader, rather,
Saying lather, bather, father?
Finally: which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, cough, hough, sough or tough?
Hiccough has the sound of "cup".
My advice is: GIVE IT UP!
Haha good one RR
[QUOTE=Brandye;185796]If that were written in some understandable language, I may reply but I cannot determine what you are saying. I am fluent in three languages and conversational in a few more but yours is beyond me.[/QUOTE]
Is there any chance for French to be one of those languages? Continually writing a language I don't master can get quite bothersome...
So yeah um my gf is pregnant. She is 4 months along and still likes to get frisky.
I worry that our child will come out braindamaged from the sex. Am I bieng silly or is there a real danger? Thanks.
being silly
What nuttychick said.The best time for a woman to really enjoy sex is during pregnancy.She has no periods,a radiant glow about her and is very frisky due to hormone changes.Sure you may have to experiment with positions to see what works,but if she wants it please don't withold the sex.The baby might actually be soothed by the movement.
The two of you can probably enjoy intercourse right up until several days before delivery. It all depends, so check with your doctor.
You will find that this is a good time to explore other positions. The 69 side-by-side is a particularly good one once penetration is not possible. Until such time, try reclining on your sides facing each other. Another is to have her recline on the side of the bed while you stand or kneel on the floor.
Will all positions, be gentle! no roughhousing or vigorous thrusting.
Thanks. My brother said it might happen but its nice to so my gf and I have nothing to worry about.
Read around. The best is likely you lying on your back with your knees draped over him lying cross-wise to you on his side. No pressure on your tummy and it gives both of you access to all critical parts.
No,nothing to worry about unless there are any medical conditions to consider.Relax and enjoy!!!!
As women enter the third trimester, many experience heightened sexual drive. Find a good position and go for it.
I am almost 22 weeks pregnant with my second child and my sex drive has shot up tremendoulsly. My husband even says that he enjoys it, and says "it's hot". I think one of the main reasons that it is so great during pregnancy for women and men is because there is no fear of getting pregnant. There is no nervousness about birth control, etc.
As far as people being less attracted to pregnant women, (I have had friends ask me this several times), from my experience a lot of men are actually more attracted to you during this time. I am not a man, so I really can't say why for sure. But I do have my own ideas, and info from my husband and other men that I have talked to about the subject.