just get the PC muscle exercises and try them. they probly work (never tryed them). some people are different then others.

Dear Darkheart,

Yes, indeedee, you have what is known as Premature Ejaculation. It is a common malady that affects teens and young men up to about the age of twenty five or so. Not only that, it can revisit any time througout life on a temporary transitory basis. Not to worry, you are normal and this "hair trigger" problem is just part and parcel of being a teen with raging hormones. You will age out of it in time; however, having said that, there is an exercise the two of you can do that will help get a handle on the situation in a couple of weeks or so depending upon how often the two of you can work on it.

You have a very wise girlfriend. I would praise her insight with respect to being beginners and having to learn to get better with practice and experience.

I will describe the exercise in follow-up post. Stand by.

TIA for your patience. I do have a "life" and I had to devote some time and attention to other things.

PE

BACKGROUND-

TIA for your patience. I do have a "life" and I had to devote some time and attention to other things.

Premature Ejaculation or PE:

Brandye and I discussed this matter several days ago in another thread but for the life of me, I cannot find it by doing a search of the forum. She presented information on the "Squeeze Technique" and I offered the following exercise. Both work and are accepted methods. The squeeze works in the moment to squelch an orgasm while the exercise is a global training and conditioning method of behavioral modification to help you pinpoint a couple of benchmarks along your arousal curve thus making it possible for you to recognize an impending or imminent climax.

BACKGROUND-

The sexual arousal curve is shaped like a modified bell curve in that it has a rather sharp rising leading edge, a short flat top known as the "plateau" and a short gentle trailing edge known as the refractory period that then curves into a shallow trailing edge known as the afterglow. For men the span along the base of the curve is fairly short, and for women it is very wide. In addition, the leading edge or early arousal phase is steep rising fairly quickly, while for women it is very long and shallow. So too are the trailing edges after the orgasm. For men the timeline for the refractory period before another orgasm is possible is perhaps 15-30 minutes, whereas for women it can be as short as moments (although times vary widely for both genders). The remaining afterglow portion of the curve can be perhaps an hour for men and many hours to all day for women.

BENCHMARKS-

The primary point of interest (Benchmark #1) is that point along the leading edge of the curve where you know an orgasm is imminent yet you can maintain control and not coast past the trigger point when all stimulation has stopped. The secondary point of interest (B#2) is the trigger point of the climax.

Maintaining control over our climax is relatively easy when we masturbate because we monitor our sensations and progress via an internal feedback network. This ability to self-govern or regulate is missing when we turn control of our arousal over to our lover. Moreover, the overall height of the curve is shorter when we masturbate and taller when we are in the presence of a lover. In short, this means we are "turned on" much more intensely when we are influenced by our lover.

Therein lies part I of the problem. We enjoy the increased level of arousal and do not want the experience to end, yet end it does usually with a surprise climax. The climax also has a tendency to sneak up and surprise us because we often do not recognize signs that it is about to occur, and this is part II. The purpose of the exercise is to make us aware of when an orgasm is about to happen and with sufficient warning so that we can manage how we choose to handle it.

* We can simply enjoy the end of a blissful event and let it happen
* We can pause the proceedings by immediately stopping all stimulation until the sense of urgency subsides. This gives us the ability to enjoy one or more additional buildups of our orgasm further enhancing our enjoyment; or, to give us time to get into position for intercourse; or, if oral stimulation is the name of the game, for the woman to do one of the following:
+ remove her mouth from his penis
+ raise her tongue in order to prevent the semen from flying to the rear of her mouth possibly triggering a gag reflex
+ increase or decrease and/or change the type of stimulation she is giving

As you can see there are plenty of reasons why it is beneficial to gain control over the timing and placement of one's orgasm.

THE PE EXERCISE-

As noted, above, the purpose of the exercise is to train us to recognize the sensations associated with an impending orgasm while there is still sufficient time to prevent it from occuring when we do not want it to.

Young men in their teens and early twenties are prone to having a "hair trigger" release brought on in part by the following:
* not being able to recongnize the clues that an orgasm is about to happen.
* being lulled into intense euphoria and not having the will to break away and pull in the reins

EXERCISE PREP-

The exercise requires a joint effort on the part of you and your partner. It cannot be accomplished "single handedly" (pun, if any, intended!), because of our internal feedback. Remember, when someone else is providing the caresses and stimulation, there is no internal feedback to monitor and regulate our climb up the curve, and therein lies the whole purpose of all this.

Practicing the exercise can be fun, so enlist your girlfriend's help and support. It is to her benefit as well as yours that she participate.

Understand that failures are bound to happen. If you inadvertently climax when practicing the exercise, laugh it off and do not worry about it. To get upset is to set you back. So, if you do experience an orgasm when trying to prevent it from happening, just wait until the refractory phase is over and try again if time permits. Othewise, try again another time.

It is of utmost importance that you undertake each exercise session when you are relaxed, will not be interrupted, or distracted; and, when you are not planning to be romantic. That said, during the first several sessions, begin by having her stimulate your penis and bypass all the preliminary kissing, caressing that would usually precede all this. Near the end of your training sessions, you can include all kissing and caressing in order to further intensify your arousal and excitement in order to put your newly learned skills to the test.**

THE EXERCISE-

Recline on the bed while she sits or lies on her side beside you. Her task is to stroke your penis and mimic your specific and unique movements that you have come to rely upon over the years to bring about your orgasms. So, if you have not demonstrated how you masturbate and guided her hand with yours in order for her to learn to mimic your movements and pressures--teach her--before going any further.

Your task is to remain consciously aware of your progress as you become more and more aroused and excited. Your first concern is to recognize the sensations associated with Benchmark #1 and to tell your partner to immediately stop all activity. She must not move a muscle. Something as simple as allowing your penis to shift position even a little within her grasp is often enough to stimulate deep-seated nerves in the root structure within the abdominal cavity and bring on an orgasm.

Your second concern is not to become lulled into just letting these fantastic feelings go on because to do so is to give the orgasm permission to happen next. You absolutely must develop the will to "wake up" out of your blissful state and say: "FREEZE!" Her responsibility is to do just that and not a moment later.

After she freezes, your sense of urgency will subside as you backslide down the curve just a bit. When you feel in control, again, she can begin to stimulate you and bring you back up to that first benchmark, one or two more times. She can then end your "torture" and help you go past the point of no return and enjoy and orgasm to conclude the session. As this happens you must learn to associate the sensations that immediately precede the triggering of your orgasm.

When you can consistently and reliably recognize the sensations associated with B#1, your next task as a couple is to try and move B#1 closer to B#2 and still maintain control. This is where the fun and challenge really begins.

SCHEDULING-

Time permitting you can do two exercises back to back in the same session just like having multiple orgasm.

** I understand that when a couple is not living together finding time alone is difficult, so if you must combine lovemaking and the exercise, then do so but understand that it will add additional stress and complexity to the training.

Regardless, expect that in order for you or anyone else reading this and doing the exercises, it will take a few weeks of devotion so do not expect instant results. Once learned this skill will stay with you for life. Expect that when you do begin engaging in intercourse, PE is prone to happen to the inexperienced:
* upon initial entry
* on the back stroke
* anytime during the first few strokes, and--
* within the first minute or two of intercourse.

It is generally not considered PE if a man ejaculates after the first couple of minutes of stroking. Use the exercise for manual {hand) stimulation and/or oral, or intercourse.

THE SQUEEZE TECHNIQUE-

Here is a link should you want to know how to use this method as Plan B.

http://www.nvsh.nl/Website....s_2.htm

I understand that there is additional information on the forum.

Please feel free to ask if you have any questions, comments, or, concerns. Good Luck.

Darkheart,

As a teen, many of my partners could last long enough to barely get it in. My rolling condoms on brought others off. All young males come quick but come often. Advice from an aunt and older sister was to jack them off during foreplay. This slowed them down and geet me more of what I wanted.

Do not perseverate on this; you are quite normal. Many of us women do not reach orgasm through penile thrusting, anyway, so how long you last is not as important as you may think. Ten minutes is about the outside limit for enjoyment for many of us and five is quite satisfactory for me.

Next to their length, men seem to get hung up on how long they last. I never had a man reach orgasm too quickly who could not be recovered for another go.