Your guide to wild rampant skin-on-skin full-body-contact sex.
1. massage
2. erotic massage/necking
3. body worship
4. manual stimulation
5. cunnilingus/fellatio
6. cunnilingus/fellatio with manual stimulation of the G-Spot/P-Spot
7. G-Spot caressing using the penis
8. posterior fornix caressing using the penis
9. alternate between the G-Spot and the posterior fornix for as long as he can hold out
if a break between her orgasms is needed return to body worship to keep her warm
10. time for his climax
11. cuddle
12. rest
Repeat three times per session.
Have three sessions per week.
Spending time on 1,2, and 3 guarantees completion on 4 through 10.
Proper outercourse leads to intercourse.
Take turns "leading" with your partner.
My bf and I are in a long term relationship, but haven't been sexually active all that long. We have done all of the above in many combos, but can't seem to get him to stay up past putting the condom on. We tell ourselves its just a matter of practice and finding what works, but we tend to get caught up in the rest of it because we're having such a good time with those things. Ideas?
Try a larger size condom for one - most buy too small and then wonder what happened to their erection. The next step for him to realise that great as sex is - it isn't worth dying for and wouldn't he want to protect you as well? It isn't just STDs, but also but yeast infections and genital warts.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;211295] as sex is - it isn't worth dying for and wouldn't he want to protect you as well? It isn't just STDs, but also but yeast infections and genital warts.[/QUOTE]
Well duh. We admittedly don't worry QUITE as much b/c I'm his first and I had never done it without before him, but we still always use one. I was mostly looking for erection ideas. We have kind of decided that while emotionally there are no regrets, physically we started too soon and need to learn each other a little more. Thanks EEK.
i think i love you EvilEvilKitten. this should be given to every man and woman out there but for now only the special few will be able to use these words of wisdom
I'm sure it is in one of my "how-to" sex books.
Sort of like our old training camps...............LOL
Of course, that involved a very different form of contact....YIKES
So is it bad to spend the majority of your time on steps 1-3?
Not as long as you get to all the steps!
Of course, haha, thanks!
This is way too structured. Sometimes a quick passionate romp is all a couple needs. And as for outercourse, I agree it is important but many times outercourse like listening to each other, helping each other out, being nice to one another can really lead to some good intercourse.
Buddy, that will get to step one but not much futher. If you want to unlock her passion, just follow the path.
I would love to do this...but my girl gets dry after an orgasm (shes like a guy...but much sexier :p)....and lube doesnt seem to help all that well...:(
Love it ;-)
More lube, Ducy! Never skimp on lube, hun. And you might try Astro-Glide. I know many prefer water-based but this is why they developed silicone based lubes.
At his age, if he's not maintaining erections, there's something wrong with him, not your technique. Guys, learn to love the condom because it means sex is ON.
New member....but Kudos to you Evil.... Dynamic sharing! Thanks....
So what exactly is body worship? I keep hearing it on these forums.
There's a sticky post right next to this one that explains Body Worship.
Can you give examples of each of the program and how to do them, some of them I'm not sure about
What specifically aren't you sure about?
I'm confused about how to find the G-Spot and P-Spot with my penis. How do I direct it to hit certain spots, do I do it using different angles like putting a pillow under her bum?
First of all YOU have the P-Spot, not her. You're more than confused.
Also how to find the G-Spot with your penis has already been extensively covered elsewhere in the various threads - do NOT ask me to do your reasearch and experimentation for you - you're a big boy now and should be able to hunt it down.
I agree with AJ, this is too structured. I've been visiting the forums here for quite a while, and I've noticed that you keep bringing up this program every time someone has a problem in the sack. I hope you aren't suggesting that this is the dictionary definition of a satisfying sexual experience. IMHO, lovemaking loses some of it's magic when it's reduced to a step-by-step process. Spontaneity and creativity are important elements as well.
But when you are having problems, you need some structure. You need something people can read, think about and consider before they get into it. That's the point of this program. How many of you even knew about the posterior fornix before you read about it here?
When you haven't had sex for 10 YEARS what kind of spontanity can you reasonably expect? NONE. When neither of you has had any experience and/or has not developed a satisfying technique, what kind of "magic" can you expect? Blundering about or "slam bam" does NOT cut it. When your spouse is fighting you every step of the way and you ask how to begin are you going to be satisfied with something like "Well, just tell her how you feel" or would you rather be able to SHOW her something. "This is what I had in mind."
Instead of fighting this TRY it first.
Because everyone who has tried it has nothing but GOOD things to say about it.
Don't get me wrong, I don't think the program, or anything in it, is a bad idea. (Except for the P-spot massage. Tried it a few times, hated it.) And I can see where structure is needed for a couple who really has NO idea what they're doing. But if a couple hasn't had sex for ten years, there are WAY bigger problems at work than anything the program can fix.
My point is that it has it's place, but it isn't the end all, be all of sexual experiences. Three times per session? Three sessions a week? Come on. I can't speak for others, but I can't do something three times a night, three nights a week and not get bored with it, no matter how great it is. Did you just mean for the program to be like a jump start to a couple's sex life? If so, that would make much more sense to me than simply saying, "Follow the steps precisely for X amount of time, Y times a week, until death do you part and you'll have a great sex life."
You get bored by sex??? The you aren't paying close enough attention to the details of what you're doing.
Honey, The Program isn't the problem here.
No, I don't get bored with sex. At least not the sex I'm having. I get bored with the same routine over and over again.
Creativity is all in the details - wake up.
I've given a lot of thought to this over the last few days, which is unusual for me, (I don't usually get caught up in a rolling argument on an internet forum) and I think I need to clarify where I'm coming from.
As much as I hate to admit this, I think one of my character flaws got the better of me in this case, and I decided from reading many of your posts that I just didn't like the way you doled out advice. I thought that you came off as conceited, and if there's one thing I can't stand, it's a know-it-all. I think the best way for people to have better, healthier lives in general, (not just sex) is for people to simply have the courage and humility to find whatever it is that works for them, and the strength to apply it to their lives. Not just take someone else's step-by-step instructions and end up even more frustrated and bitter because they couldn't get a square peg to fit a round hole. Re-reading some of your posts, my new impression of you is of someone who has done just that, which deserves kudos. Far too few people do it. You don't sound like you would be too happy trying to apply my views to your life.
I do however think it's fair to point out that my wife and I haven't followed much of your advice, either. Not much on relationships, and only the more basic advice about sex. Nonetheless, we've been together for five years now and haven't looked back. Proof enough to me that there is a right path for everyone, and they aren't all the same.
I concede that I let my perception of some of your views and your writing style color my judgement and I took it out on your program. For that, I sincerely apologise.
P.S. -- Wifey and I somehow ended up with a whole free afternoon tommorrow, and we've decided that the program would at the very least be a great way to kill all that time. I'll let you know how it goes. ;)
Psycho - I have been messing around with men for 40 years now and married for 30 years to the same man. If I do not know it all, then I certainly should at least come close to it. My personality is a decided one, more forthright than most, and I tend to get impatient with the pretences people use to rationalize their irrationality.
There are people who simply can not get out of their own way when it comes right down to it. For those people, here is a checklist of things they should do and in a sequence that makes sense. Starting with what is not 'threatening' and moving gently into what might be 'threatening'.
As you believe so shall you do. I am out to change your mind about sex; what it is, what it can be - this does not permit half measures and pats on the head saying "there, there".
If she's not hurtling herself into his arms with glee, if he's not looking at her with sparkling eyes, if there's no light and laughter or exhilarating joy - then he/she may want to think about what he/she's doing and what he/she's missing..and WHY.
If sex for you is NOT a GLORIOUS REAFFIRMATION of LIFE, then you're not doing it right.
Apology accepted btw.
So, did they or didn't they??
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;231741]So, did they or didn't they??[/QUOTE]
I think they didn't................................................
A free afternoon would have been the perfect time!
'Fraid not. :( We barely started the outercourse when I got called by a colleague of mine to come to the hospital right away. One of the police officers who works in my department was shot during a routine traffic stop. He'll be fine, but my mood was pretty D.O.A. after that.
DRAT!
You will have to try this again. Bet you will both enjoy it immensely.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;200969]
7. G-Spot caressing using the penis
8. posterior fornix caressing using the penis
[/QUOTE]
sorry if this has already been asked, but what exactly does caressing using the penis mean? we talking some angled rubbing action that goes into hard fast thrusting or what?
Okay - since does does hard thrusting with the penis equal caressing?
You take the head of your penis - the glans and GENTLY rub it in the particular area of focus with just enough pressure so it works for HER.
You know nothing is more boring for a woman than some guy pounding away at her for hours. This is precisely what women mean when we say 'it is what you can DO with it that matters'.
Focus upon HER and learn to 'listen' to her body's responses.
Reserve any hard thrusting for the last few minutes and only to her posterior fornix after shes' had a few orgasms beforehand.
You're going to hard thrusting far too early! You're also neglecting the oral sex and then the oral with manual. Give her orgasms at each hotspot before moving on to the next. If she needs to rest a bit, you return to the body worship, which is the technical name for the hands and lips all over her body, before returning to caressing the next hotspot on the list.
BTW you should not need to use your hands when caressing her G-Spot with your penis. Be guided by her responses and then remember how far in - do not draw rings around your penis however.
You're getting there.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;240611]Okay - since does does hard thrusting with the penis equal caressing?
You take the head of your penis - the glans and GENTLY rub it in the particular area of focus with just enough pressure so it works for HER.
You know nothing is more boring for a woman than some guy pounding away at her for hours. This is precisely what women mean when we say 'it is what you can DO with it that matters'.
Focus upon HER and learn to 'listen' to her body's responses.
Reserve any hard thrusting for the last few minutes and only to her posterior fornix after shes' had a few orgasms beforehand.[/QUOTE]
are there any things in more detail about that caressing because that is absolutely alien to me. i'm 24 and i've had at least 30 partners - but all girls around my age so late teens to early 20s.
pretty much my technique has been to go over her body with lips and hands and make clear how into her i am, then work into manual stimulation until she really wants me in, then slowly work with my dick while using my thumb in and out sorta shallow but angled up towards the g-spot, and then some hard pounding to finish myself off (but i have also typically been using this to finish her off if i think its possible, otherwise i continue with my dick slowly and my thumb at the same time).
but again i have no clue how to consistently do that multiple orgasm business... is something similar to what i'm saying your caress business or am i way off the mark?
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;240656]You're going to hard thrusting far too early! You're also neglecting the oral sex and then the oral with manual. Give her orgasms at each hotspot before moving on to the next. If she needs to rest a bit, you return to the body worship, which is the technical name for the hands and lips all over her body, before returning to caressing the next hotspot on the list.
BTW you should not need to use your hands when caressing her G-Spot with your penis. Be guided by her responses and then remember how far in - do not draw rings around your penis however.
You're getting there.[/QUOTE]
oh i didn't make that clear, my thumb when i'm doing the g-spot is on her clitoris slowly/lightly.
so you talking like two rounds of oral orgasms there? first one just my tongue the second one with some insertion of something (finger probably).
split with this body worship?
The outline is below there. You return to body worship in between orgasms only if she requires a pause in the proceedings.
Cunnilingus - you make no mention of cunnilingus - why is that?
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;240683]The outline is below there. You return to body worship in between orgasms only if she requires a pause in the proceedings.
Cunnilingus - you make no mention of cunnilingus - why is that?[/QUOTE]
i called it oral orgasms. i dunno i guess i just don't like typing out the word.
i'm gonna see how it goes friday although it will have been over a week since i last had sex so i'm thinking she will want me in her fast. maybe that'll make it even better if i take my time.
Omg this is perfect EvilEvil! pshh :( you tell everyone to come her but me! -tear-
lol anyway this is just what I needed to see! You know you give out some really great advice. This is going to really help me and my boyfriend out with our rushing problem.
We both love massages anyway :D
Oh one question...ok so how do you body worship a man? I would feel really silly saying something like your ,"Your dick looks amazing!" My boyfriend does it to me and he is just awesome at body worship and dirty talk but I...am...not. I get good ideas sometimes but only when I'm alone and if I remember them and use them...I run out of things to say.
Thank you. I have been studying sex and inter-gender relationships for more than 40 years now - I find it fascinating.
The Program answers so many issues. Timidity, shyness, body issues, lack of skill, acceptance of sexuality, participation issues - and a lot of other issues can all be solved by simply taking your time and moving from less intimate to more intimate sexual activities.
Please note that The Program is gender-neutral - either/any partner can "lead" at any time. I have tried a "mutual lead" but it didn't work out very well. Trying to focus upon what you are supposed to be doing and reading your partner's responses while trying to focus upon what you are feeling and displaying that to your partner - it gets messy. signals get crossed, and someone invariably falls off the bed.
Ah well!
Try again tomorrow!
> Omg this is perfect EvilEvil! pshh you tell everyone to come her but me! -tear-
Ah, but didn't I recommend reading all of the articles listed in the Index, including EEKs, more than once?
> anyway this is just what I needed to see! You know you give out some really great advice. This is going to really help me and my boyfriend out with our rushing problem.
Yup, she certainly does. More help? More articles can be read.
Yes sir you did and I did cause see :) I found this :P
Nah I'm pretty good for right now. Just taking it all in. Thank you :)
Sesshlove
This sounds awfully complicated. Is this really the simplest way of doing it?
I would think that consciously doing all these things would detract from the experience?
You might think so, but you would be incorrect.
I do plan on trying it. Anything to make sex better is something I'm willing to try (I'm greedy, what can I say?) I'm worried that I'll get hung up on one and not go onto the others.
There's no reason to get hung up. It's a pretty natural progression. Start with simple pleasures, then get more and more advanced by adding concepts.
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