Relying up a vibrator has been known to change the way a person responds to less intense manual and oral stimulation. Vibrators used to stimulate the genitals are fine once in a while and anytime anywhere else. Once a person relies upon them then to switch back requires some reconditioning or training in order to be responsive to the softer sensations.

Consider that each person develops a Fine Art to how we masturbate that is unique and specific to each one of us. If we miss the mark so to speak then an orgasm will either not happen or if it does, not to the degree expected. Once you are able to redevelop your technique, the next step is to take his hand and guide his movements in order to mimic your motions, rhythms, and pressures.

Feedback is crucial. When we masturbate the feedback is internal and permits us to modulate our movements and make any midcourse corrections, yet when we turn the job over to our partner, all any of us can hope for is a 50/50 chance of doing things right. With something so important who wants this as a batting average? So, what we must do is to provide an alternative source of feedback that can be either verbal or non-verbal. Verbal is a word or other utterence; non-verbal is some form of body language that the two of you work out to convey specific meanings.

So, when you have some time alone when you will not be disturbed, masturbate and do it repeatedly until you can do it reliably and consistently using your fingers. Place the vibrator on the shelf for the time being unless you just want to give each other a general massage.