im having problem with my friend because she still doesnt want to have sex with me although she is giving me oral sex and i also give her oral but still she's not yet comfortable to have sex with me..
so my question is how do i make a girl comfortable enough to have sex with me?
and im just thinking that if i ejaculate inside her anus would it be okay?
Neko - the number one problem females have with males on the topic of sex is: males pushing them into having sex before she is ready. STOP PUSHING.
How would you like it if someone kept after you to "do this, do this, do this, do this, do this, do this, do this"? You wouldn't.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you only convince her more that she is right to refuse you.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you only convince her more that it is her body you're after and NOT her.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you are convincing her that you don't really give a damn about her as a person.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you are only convincing her that you have no respect for her since you are not accepting her decision.
Have I made the position clear to you yet?
When it comes to sex: Women Rule!!
you can't make her do anything she isn't comfortable with. is she a virgin? because that could be playing a large role in her uncertainty.
What the hell? The girl's not comfortable enough to have vaginal sex with you and you're asking if it's ok to ejaculate inside her anus? Take a HUGE STEP BACK. There is absolutely no way in hell either of you are remotely responsible enough(though it's a stretch to ever call unprotected anal sex responsible) to be doing something like that.
So many health issues at stake here. Not just STD's, but general bacterial infections as well.
There's no convincing. A person does it when they're ready to. When they do it when they're not ready, inevitable emotional damage occurs.
Your question while simple enough has a much more complex answer than do "this" and she'll want to have intercourse.
First of all, you should be asking her. It is her body, her life. If she is a virgin, does she want to remain chaste until marriage? Until she is much older? Whether yes or no: Until your relationship is more mature? Until she finds the right guy? Until she is more comfortable with you, the relationship, and has developed trust and confidence with you? Other?
I understand the drive and the desire to have intercourse, particularly the first time--or, even the first time with this person, however, it is important to know and understand that the act of intercourse is much different for women than for men. This is particularly so for young guys out on a date than for guys who have fallen in love and are planning for the long haul. For the guy out on a date it generally has more to do with getting his rocks off, first and foremost. For women anytime, it has more to do with the emotional aspect of the relationship and validating this. It is only later that guys learn that intercourse is more about the emotions and the psyche than the physical. It is the outward expression of the love a couple has for each other.
I'm not saying it isn't or cannot be all about feeling good for both, only that you have to learn what the primary reason is each time. Brandye, our resident doctor, has stated often that an orgasm is not a necessary part of nature for the female of the species as it is for the male, therefore, she is free to enjoy them for them. That said, you need to find out from her why she is not yet ready. In addition to the reasons given, above, is the very real fear of pregnancy and other issues that are of concern to her that might impact her health and wellbeing.
As for you, please consider that as good as intercourse can be, because it has more to do with satisfying the psyche, oral stimulation and a hand job to orgasm are usually much more physically pleasurable and vastly more intense. So, while you may be curious about the act itself, climaxing via intercourse usually does not deliver the intense physical pleasure foreplay activities do. While you wait, please keep this in mind.
As for anal sex: you are very naive if you think she or any woman will want this the first time as a substitute for intercourse. Even if true, anal penetration is much more complex than vaginal penetration--and, we haven't even discussed whether or not you will be contending with the presence of a hymen. Do you know what the state of this is? If she is a virgin, do you know how best to have first intercourse?
I recommend that you pull back and do not push her, rather, learn from her and then learn more about the entire process of developing a relationship and making out. Please begin by reading the various articles listed in the Index.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;209569]Neko - the number one problem females have with males on the topic of sex is: males pushing them into having sex before she is ready. STOP PUSHING.
How would you like it if someone kept after you to "do this, do this, do this, do this, do this, do this, do this"? You wouldn't.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you only convince her more that she is right to refuse you.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you only convince her more that it is her body you're after and NOT her.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you are convincing her that you don't really give a damn about her as a person.
Everytime you push her to have sex with you, you are only convincing her that you have no respect for her since you are not accepting her decision.
Have I made the position clear to you yet?
When it comes to sex: Women Rule!![/QUOTE]
so what should i do to have sex with her?
[quote=neko;210009]so what should i do to have sex with her?[/quote]Let her decide to initiate it--end of story.
[QUOTE=neko;210009]so what should i do to have sex with her?[/QUOTE]
Are you serious? I think EEK answered it
[quote=Ducy;210016]Are you serious? I think EEK answered it[/quote]I guess he does not understand the more you push the more she will resist. Personally, I find a man who is pushy a major turn off. Hit on me? Fine but keep at it? You'll get no where, I will not return your calls, and I will blow you off. Then I will seek someone who is considerate.:)
Hmmmm is that a hint sera? :p Yea pushy is just....lame. I mean my girlfriend cant stand pushing...(I know, I made that mistake and it was just trying to get her to try a new food lol)
Heh, I just use my keys to hypnotize them into thinking I'm Brad Pitt.
Personally - I hate men who beg.
That's the reason I only dominate dominant men.
Oh yea...
Please Please PLEASE!!!! lol
That might be an interesting one. Well, girls can be comfortable if they have your trust and if you assure them of her fears. You might want to talk about it instead of going around in the dark. You might even hit her bad spot and would even ruin your friendship.
As for the anal sex, yes it is alright to do it if she allows you. Some girls would not want it so you have to ask her first. If she finds it okay and does not opposes to what you are doing, then that is fine. :)
Haillei You forget...its okay if you are wearing a condom....to ejaculate without a condom runs too many risks...such as infection fo the eurethra, or even pregnancy...Yes it can happen especially if the girl is on her tummy (Doggy, or rear entry which is common anal position)
[quote=Ducy;210219]Haillei You forget...its okay if you are wearing a condom....to ejaculate without a condom runs too many risks...such as infection fo the eurethra, or even pregnancy...Yes it can happen especially if the girl is on her tummy (Doggy, or rear entry which is common anal position)[/quote] Urethra, Ducy.
hehe thanks...my spell check doesnt work, it opens a little window to the sexinfo main page lol
[QUOTE=neko;210009]so what should i do to have sex with her?[/QUOTE]
There is only ONE thing you can do to have sex with her: WAIT
I'll say it again: WAIT
Still didn't catch it? I'm sorry: WAIT
WAIT till she's comfortable.
WAIT till she's ready.
WAIT till YOU are ready.
Pay attention to that last one too. Cuz I'll guarantee ya bud, if you're asking what you can do to have sex, you AIN'T ready to have sex. My BF put it really well: Wait till you're ready, then wait another month or two (at least). When I lost my V I thought I was ready-had even waited years longer than most do. Found out I was wrong later. Wasn't as ready as I thought I was. Just WAIT.