I love it...

As a male, i have seen a lot of porn in my life... Its fun sharing that with someone, kind of like masturbating together.

has anyone else tried to make their own adult video?

my g/f and i decided to give it a try (ok, it was mainly my idea, but she was excited too when she got into it ). anyway, we set up a video cam on a tripod connected to a tv and with a remote control. that way we could see what we were taping as we went and alter position, angles etc as we went for best effect.

we found the only way to do it was just to make it fun and not be afraid to laugh (some things look REAL funny from certain perspectives ... but that's another story!). it really helps to get over the slight awkwardness to not be too serious.

over time we made a whole bunch of vids, starting with filming each other doing solo masturbation, then shower scenes, striptease, playing with toys (singly, then together), all the way up to full intercourse, etc.

it was lots of fun and gave a whole new appreciation of what pornstars must go through ... makes me horny to just think about it! ... now where IS that darn camera when you need it?!    

anybody else care to share their experiences on this?

my insecurity lies with watching the videos, I feel weird about my husband being turned on by the video instead of me...like I'm not good enough, he hasn't watched a video since we've been together, and says he hasnt even thought about it, so I was thinking about surprising him, but after checking out a couple, it just makes me with I looked like those girls...does that make any sense or am I just totally messed up? sorry for all the confusion does anyone know of any that are educational and tasteful? Maybe that would help...

[QUOTE=Quote (girlygirl @ Jan. 04 2003,16:31)]You could just pile some books on a dresser and leave the camera on top of them.  Or you could invite a friend over to help.  

I made a video once, but I didn't have this problem, because there were more than two people involved.
[/QUOTE]
hey girlygirl,

my b/f and i were chatting jokingly about this with a friend. he said he would be willing to "help out". i know the guy and am comfortable with him, but never having done this before, am excited but kinda shy about "doing it" in front of him - feels kinda weird, no?

i thought my b/f might be reluctant, but he says he is into it - just no messing with the other guy! that's fine by me.

anyone have any tips on how to make it work without dying of embaressment?

i like watching people have sex (including anime/hentai)

since i can't (and wouldn't want to) watch my neighbors; videos, dvds, downloaded clips are the next best thing

I would make a video if we had a video camera

we have taken pictures with our digital camera.  ours has a timer so we can set everything up and both be in the shot.  it can make short videos but since the computers are in the front room and we have no curtains, that woudn't work.  to many neighbor kids.

Video's are fun. i like going down on my H while he's watching another couple having sex.

i'm curious what you have learned. i can't say i have seen anything new, maybe i'm not watching the right videos.

I like some videos, as long as the pleasure isn't too obviously faked.

The only problem with "learning" from pornos is that it's kind of like learning kung fu from a Jackie Chan movie...what looks good on the screen isn't always what works best in real life.

Actually, looking back at vette's post, I realized he said he learned from instructional videos, not pornos.  While my Jackie Chan allegory still stands when it comes to porn, I don't think I've ever really watched an instructional sex video.  If they really are helpfull, maybe I'll look into them.  What are some specific videos that you've found helpful?  Are they entertaining as well as educational?

(Edited by girlygirl at 2:53 pm on Sep. 28, 2002)

Sex vids do nothing 4 me unless my g/f is with me, but it does nothing when im alone.

BUT Hentai vids can get me going!!!

I'm a fan of hentai, too. I hate the "pervert" stuff, but the tamer stuff is great. Guess I read too many comics as a kid.

well since im 15...i don't own any sex-related videos, nor can i order them from the TV...although i think the 'instructional' ones sound like fun for sometime in the future...as for watching porno's...with my boyfriend...i don't know, i don't think i'd be all that comfortable just sitting there watching it, i think i'd be a little more comfortable if i was going down on him while he was watching...but i don't know...it's not necessarily a romantic thing...like a sex scene in some movies might be okay..but i don't think i'd really like it too much. as for making my own...i dont know...i mean those things can be forever...and say your relationship goes bad the other person could totally use that to 'get back at you' but i guess if you have some sort of understanding and a serious relationship that it would be ok...but im not there yet so not for me

[QUOTE=Quote (Guest @ Dec. 26 2002,17:53)]something about watching those girls makes me feel insecure, will my husband be more turned on by the girls in those videos than he is by me?  I would be uncomfortable during sex thinking that the video turned him on instead of me...[/QUOTE]
i am not clear whether you feel insecure about WATCHING a video or about MAKING one??

in any case, the video is only a turn-on (and actually most of them get boring after a while); the trick is to use it for fun, new ideas and a bit of harmless fantasizing, then get down to the real thing yourselves.

most people (if they are honest with themselves) fantasize to some degree about sex with someone other than their regular partner; this doesn't mean that they actually WOULD have sex with someone else. videos for the most part are just a harmless release, so don't worry about it.

same argument applies to making your own video - if you just treat is as a bit of fun it is great, but don't take it too seriously or the fun goes out of it.

the commercial videos out there range from downright awful to excellent; some of the most erotic and tasteful (yet quite explicit) ones that I have seen are directed by a guy called Andrew Blake.

Most of my guy friends think it is odd that I like to watch videos. I think it's just the fact most women won't admit it outloud. Watching and making them is all the fun.

My fiance and I have watched several adult movies together. Sometimes we laugh at them and sometimes they do give us different things to try. There is something naughty and voyeuristic about them. However, it's fun and exciting to watch them with your partner.

LOL, girlygirl!! Amen to that!

The positions that people are put into, especially to depict lesbian sex, require so much effort that sexual pleasure would be impossible.

Soft porn in a romantic context can be intriguing. The very few other I have seen have been so conrived or so demeaning that they are turnoffs for us.

Amen Brotha!

*high fives Jamez*

Bring on the H.
It's sort of detatched from reality.. and if both partners realize this... it can be very intriuging.

My GF has started fondling me during a spicy scene in many movies... needless to say, we rarely see entire flicks.

I am thinking about trying this with my husband, but I thought I would scope a few out myself first...and I don't know...I know he would like it, but something about watching those girls makes me feel insecure, will my husband be more turned on by the girls in those videos than he is by me?  I would be uncomfortable during sex thinking that the video turned him on instead of me...is this ridiculous?? How can I "fix" this problem?? any help would be WONDERFUL, also any suggestions on videos to try first would be good...thanks so much!

[QUOTE=Quote (Guido @ Dec. 22 2002,02:58)]has anyone else tried to make their own adult video?[/QUOTE]
my b/f wants to try this but with our digital camera, instead of a movie. I'm kinda interested, but except for solo shots, how do you do this when you are both involved?

You could just pile some books on a dresser and leave the camera on top of them. Or you could invite a friend over to help.

I made a video once, but I didn't have this problem, because there were more than two people involved.

I think that the videos is a great idea, while you are having sex, it gives you something to watch, that gets you horny at the same time, i love the idea

I am in a five year relationship that I thought was great. I love sex and all of the "extras"- outfits, bondage, plastic wraps, toys, stripping- get the idea? I knew my boyfriend looked at porn on the internet. However, I did not know to what extent. This is done daily, whether he is at his home or mine, and he masterbates while looking. I was bold and ask the main question. "Do you fanaticize about me while you are looking at porn and doing your thing?" His anwer was "Sometimes."

I am now devistated and the whole relationship has taken on a totally different perspective. Am I wrong? I want honest answers please.

It's hard to say without knowing more about your situation, but I think you have nothing to worry about. Masturbating every day is not unusual for men, and many men prefer to have some visual stimulation while masturbating. And I may be wrong about this, but I think that there are very few people, male or female, who fantasize exclusively about their partners.

Lacey
i recently went through the same kind of thing w/ my boyfriend of over 2 yrs. we live together and his work schedule has him coming home at 3am...sometimes im awake sometimes im not.
awhile back i found naked pic of girls on our computer. my problem was that it wasn't just regular porn pics b/c that i dont mind so much b/c techinically those girls aren't tangible to him and we've watched porn together. my problem was that these naked pics were from girls he was meeting online in chat rooms or whatever and he was also sending them back some naked pics of himself. now this really hurt my feelings b/c these girls are girls he's actually talking to and could meet up w/ i didn't know if they lived nearby or what?!?
we finally had a big discussion about it and he said he would stop doing it. his only excuse was that sometimes he gets home from work and he's feeling a lil randy and im asleep so thats what he'd do. i thought that wasnt a very good excuse but whatever!
point is you guys need to talk about this in depth and tell him how uncomfortable and/or hurt you feel about it. from your post you seem like a very adventurous type in the bedroom way more than i am. so ask him what exactly he's lacking that he's getting from this. but like i said try not to worry too much about anonymous girls on porn sites but if it comes down to cybering or whatever w/ real chicks then you'll be in the same boat as me.
hope everything works out!

Ahhh...well..a 3some fantasy, thats a coat of a different color! hahah (just kidding).

In fact, using porn to help communicate your fantasies or interests is a great way to get the ball rolling!

Watching a video, reading a story or viewing pics can send clear signals to your partner. In return, if you see your partner looking at something you dind't think he/she was into, DON"T PANIC and please, for god sake, don't say, "GOD, THAT IS SO GROSS, I WOULD NEVER DO THAT."

Why? Because you could be ruining the chance to engage in a topic of conversation that could open up a whole cornucopia of subjects - and after all, aren't all healthy relationships based on good communication and trust?

Be not afraid! It's only porn - use it - don't let it use you!

Thats so funny AngelPie!! My hubby is very nice to look at as well so I know the feeling.
And I agree with Rawbob, my husband complains about porn movies and the size of the men. And the young dudes in most male magazines , arent even the demographic that buys them. Motivatation to improve your health is wonderful. And I loved to be "pretty" and get stared at and catcalled (especialy as a housewife). I'm talking more along the lines of those who are suseptable to major self esteem issues. Some people look at the cup half full and some half empty.
All in all I think we're on the same level Rawbob. Very well said.

i will admit to having looked at a bit of porn on the net. especially in my last relationship which i was not very happy in, emotionally or physically. but dont take it as though you're not good enough. i know i used to look at it because my ex just didnt do anyhting for me at the end. but now im in a wonderful relationship with the hottest girl and still occasionally look at it. im perfectly happy with our sex life but sometimes guys just like to look at what they cant have i guess. that might sound strange to some girls, but its true. sometimes, i think its also the fact that some of the stuff guys look at is stuff that cant actually happen in their relationships (ie. lesbian porn) or stuff that they are shy about or just dont want to participate in (ie. anal or group stuff). dont be offended by your boyfriends like of porn (good english i know, hehe), its when hes looking at other women on the street and wanting to have sex with them that you need to worry. obviously if hes a very attractive guy, you must be a very attractive girl, so dont let the self-esteem thing affect you, maybe if you let him take the pictures he wont have a need for the internet porn, he'll have his own private collection. i know for a fact that i enjoy my naked girlfriend more than all the naked porn chicks you can throw at me. hope this gave you another perspective.

We have talked about getting a camera and taking "naughty" pics. But he thinks that we should get a digital camera for that, (he doesn't want to take them to get developed somewhere else. ) I just recently talked to him about all of this and he says that what he looks at are things that I am not interested in doing or don't like or haven't tried yet. Is this mostly true for guys? That made me feel a little better. Also he is more into actual stories not so much as porn, which doesn't bother me any.

Very good comments from the other members! (clapping)...however, it's been my experience that most problems arise when one 1/2 of the couple does NOT support their porn-viewing partner's activities.

And we all know what happens when someone tells you NOT to do something - you find a way to do it!

My xwife used to say the same thing, "Why do you look at porn online, aren't I enough?" And i never understood how you can make a comparison between a living body and pixels on a screen. It tooks almost a year for her to discover that looking at pics were an insight into my fantasies and a good source of fodder for our sex! Hell, she's the one who bought our first webcam! ahhahaha

I want to echo what Junocozmos said"

"I also want to add that we can thank the media in general for creating unreasonable expectations for women, and young girls. Its a horrible problem that brainwashes the majority of women into thinking men want what is advertised rather than whats really for sale."

And also say that the same applies for men! It's just as intimidating for some men to always see buff, ripped, hung, handsome men in most mainstream porn (gay, str8 or bi).

For some of us, it's serves as a motivation to stay in good shape (for health reasons as well). While I know i'm probably not EVER going to be porn material, i want to always be as attractive to my mate as possible! It makes me feel good about myself as well - especially to be getting looks from folks in public - even at 41 years old !

I had issues yrs ago too...my husband get playboy and gallery and loads of other porn mags, he subscribes to several porn sites. It used to make me feel very bad about myself, I'm 5'2 120 not 5'8 and 105 ya know? But I really had to learn that these women on the net and on these films and magazines are exactly as Rawbob says. They are a fantasy. These are photos and directed scenes. These girls are airbrushed and not the average woman. I think that most men know the difference between reality and fantasy, and who would they want to take home to mom? Us. Being bi-sexual myself too I can honestly say that I dig those sites but in the end I prefer the girl I grew up nextdoor to with the big ass .

I also want to add that we can thank the media in general for creating unreasonable expectations for women, and young girls. Its a horrible problem that brainwashes the majority of women into thinking men want what is advertised rather than whats really for sale.

The problem's in the level of involvment. I agree with Vixen in the fact the I use internet for Porn purposes...and so does my hubby (i've walked in on him...uhh..anyway...) and there is nothing wrong with fuel for fantasy. However if the level of involvement is focused on meeting and forming relationships with other women/men beyond PC pals..thats where it get hairy. For examply my sisters ex husband left her two yrs ago after meeting a woman on line, forming a realtionship with her, meeting her on real time and getting her pregnant. Just gotta have self control, man...self control. Porns great tho on line or off...YAY porn

I agree completely with Guido, it's just accessable. And quite frankly, I am a greatful female. I enjoy some porn so from time to time I look at it online. It saves any shyness of going out and renting a video at the local store. It can be good for couples. If you or your man enjoy looking at some erotic sites, you can share it togther. Sit on his lap and look at some sites together. Work with it, not against it. For some reason men tend to rent more videos, go to more strip clubs, etc, whenever their women ask them not to. (Not all, but my man as well as some of his friends all retaliate when me and my girls ask them to lay off the XXX goods.)

The internet part is irrelevant - that just makes it more accessable.

I suspect most guys view porn occasionally (movies, magazines, internet, whatever) - much more so than women. I can't explain why, it is just my observation.

In most cases it is just inquisitiveness and for a harmless kick. It doesn't usually mean anything more and certainly doesn't mean that he doesn't care for you or that he is necessarily dissatisfied with you in any way.

If it really bothers you, ask him to do it privately or to include you in it - whichever you prefer.

If it isn't a big deal to him, don't let it become a big deal for you.

Hope that puts your mind at rest a little.

I am just curious what is the big deal about porn on the internet? Are we women that are with you now not enough? Are we not doing something right? Do you like to just get us all wound up with emotion?

I understand a little more now. But it seems to me almost like an everyday thing. I know that guys are more into sight then anything else. It just frusterates me at times. I have watched a porn movie or two for like a few mins and only when I am horney. When it comes to the internet since it is not such a big deal to him then I have tried to do the same, but I feel so wierd when I do. *shrug* my self esteem may also be an issue in this. It used to be way worse then this at times, I m trying to except it a little more and more. I was just curious to why it seems to happen more to guys then girls. Also he is more experienced then me, etc. Maybe that could be put into play?

Thank you for you input. I appreciate it.