He doesn't like bjs...

[springfever]

I was just wondering are there many guys that don't enjoy bjs? My bf says he doesn't like them that much...I found this really odd. I am a virgin, and don't want to have sex with him yet, but he pleases me so much, I feel guilty...I wanna please him so badly in return and don't know what to do.

I gave him one once, but he said that his penis was sore...I don't know what I did wrong (I didn't know at the time he didn't like them). This has never happend to me before. I really want to try again and make it better for him, I have picked up some tips since then lol.

What can I do to make this better? Is it just a case that some guys don't, and won't enjoy them..? I have never come across this lol

[headhead]

I think there are some guys who don't care for it, but not many! Don't blame yourself; it's a fact of life that some people who are attractive in many ways have some unfortunate attitudes toward sex.

How many guys have you known who liked it?!

[springfever]

...I don't know why it made him sore though...
Are some guys more sensetive to it? It really worried me when he asked me to stop lol. I am not an expert by any means, but I have done it a few times and have certainly not had any complaints until now..
Are there any other things people could suggest to give him pleasure, that aren't sex? I guess a hand job, but to be honest, I feel more awkward doing that

[dlb]

There are a few oddballs out there, very few, who don't like blow jobs. When performing fellatio you need to remember that there is much more to it than simply putting a penis in your mouth and sucking on it.
I suggest you read through all the threads on this forum regarding fellatio, blow job and oral sex and also read the section on the home page about this.

[dancingdoc2]

> I wanna please him so badly in return and don't know what to do.

And in addition, please read this article listed in the Index:

How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?

> I don't know why it made him sore though...

Possibly technique; possibly timing; possibly both

If your teeth happen to scrape against him, this can be irritable; however, what you are describing seems more likely to be that you begin too early when he is not aroused to a high degree, and/or, that that your technique although not bad is going on too long.

The latter is a discussion you should have with him. You need feedback that only he can provide.

Stimulating the glans of his penis can be done a little bit early on when you first begin foreplay; however, the serious work should wait until you have him near the peak of his arousal curve. Explore and work together on this and ask for his feedback (verbal or non-verbal) on how he is responding to your caresses.

[springfever]

ty for your responces.

...there were definatly no teeth lol. And I can't see that it was too early...we had been kisssing/necking/him performing foreplay on me for some time before. In fact, he just kept wanting to do things for me lol...but he was very turned on.

I have read the articles on here since then. ...it was probs by no means great, as I was a lil nervous and less experienced then him. These tips have helped...so I feel a follow up would be a great improvment on my part lol.

He told me about a week or two after that he didn't actually enjoy recieving oral. In one way I was relieved, and this made sence, as I was really concerned I must of done something really wrong when he didn't want me to continue at the time. But on the other hand I was like...wtf...who doesn't like recieving oral?!

I think you are right in that I shall have to talk to him...maybe it is partly psychollogical or something..
And I will also try and improve, and see if he wants me to try again maybe...im sure I will be better this time. I can't live with him doing all the pleasing, and me doing nothing inreturn...tis selfish

[dancingdoc2]

Is his penis intact in that he has a foreskin, or has he been circumcised?

If he has a foreskin then there in probably lies your answer. The glans of a penis covered and protected by a foreskin is quite sensitive. Many fellas cannot tolerate having their glans touched directly. If so, then you will have to work thru the foreskin.

If the glans is exposed then you should probably talk to him about how he masturbates and what is different about what you do orally and manually than what he does. With some answers the two of you should be able to work out a technique that is pleasurable for him.

[EvilEvilKitten]

The REAL point is that YOU are not LISTENING to HIM. You are in here trying to make up for your poor performance when in fact it wouldn't matter how good you were at oral sex because:

HE DOESN'T LIKE IT

Instead of treating him like an adult who knows what he likes or not and taking him at his word, you're treating him like a child who is too stupid/inexperienced to know.

Since when is that a good thing in any relationship?

STOP

Instead of pestering him to permit you to do something he doesn't like, ask him what he does like and do that.

DUH!!

[whyyknott]

Very few guys don't enjoy a bj. But there must be some and maybe you have just found one that doesn't. Hand jobs are nice also and especially with some lube. I had many hand jobs before I ever received a bj. The hand jobs were great and just having her nice soft hands stroking my cock was exciting. I still enjoy lots of hand play by my partner. It may be something he doesn't enjoy now but could in the future. In the future he may find bj's pleasurable and then he may never enjoy it. For now I would suggest just enjoying the pleasure her gives you and find something else for him. Down the road, this could be one thing that shows some incapatablility between your sexual desires and his and could be a concern. But I think you and him are aways from a serious relationship that this could matter.

[lnt1103]

You say he's more experienced than you, so he knows what he likes and dislikes. I agree that you shouldn't try to push on the BJ issue.

Originally Posted by springfever

he pleases me so much...I wanna please him so badly in return and don't know what to do.

Express this to him, and ask him to tell/show you what you can do for him in return.