Advice For A Virgin

[HornySlut]

I am a virgin so ignore my username. My boyfriend wants to go all the way, I don't, he's 18 I'm 16 and I'm not sure. But I want to do it. So the date was all set, anyone wanna give me any ideas one wat to do in certain situations, anything? I would gladly accept anything. I am hopeless at this.

[nuttychick]

--BEGIN HERE--w/a Partial INDEX of Sex Info 101 Sex Ed. Topics....

how about reading the great information that is all in the above link, then if you have questions.. come back and ask

[dancingdoc2]

In order to speed your search of the Index along, please read this, first:

I'm Ready for SEX! (or am I?) I really want to do it.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Before you indulge in adult fun, you'd better be adult about it.

So are you adult about sex?

1. can you separate love from sex?
2. are you on birth control?
3. can you keep your mouth shut?
4. do you realize that school and work come before sex?
5. forget your boyfriend's desire - is it YOUR desire to enjoy him?

now go read all of the info on this site about virginity/first time/ and the Kitten-isms.

[dancingdoc2]

> My boyfriend wants to go all the way, I don't,

> I'm not sure.

> But I want to do it.

Until you are absolutely certain you want to have intercourse, then do not. Some people do not value their virginal status all that much so want to open their hymen and get this out of the way. Others will remain chaste until their wedding day and Part 2 of the ceremony. Nowadays, the majority lose their virginity somewhere between very young and the day they marry.

What are your thoughts on your status?

If you believe that having sex equates to love, think again. I can pretty much assure you that at his age, your boyfriend will say and do pretty much anything in order to 1) see you naked, and 2) get his rocks off regardless of your emotions. Perhaps not, although, the likelihood of this is fairly compelling based upon history.

A girl's view of sex is vastly different from a boy's view of sex. For guys it is mostly about experiencing strong(er) more pleasant orgasms; for girls it is more about the emotional input and satisfaction. Only much later do guys put the two together.

If you want to lose your virginity in order to show or prove your love for this fella, then you are about to do it for the wrong reason.

> So the date was all set, anyone wanna give me any ideas one wat to do in certain situations, anything? I would gladly accept anything. I am hopeless at this.

What situations are you referring?

Actually, I believe the two of you put the cart before the horse by selecting a date before gathering all the information and education about this, first.

[Deviation]

basic tips for you hun,

1. talk to him about it first
2. keep it simple (missionary basically)
3. make sure your ok throughout the whole thing and any time u r uncomfortable get off and stop it... dont do it if you are unsure and shite.
4. make sure he is the right guy and you will have no regrets
5. whatever happens ensure your happy
6. prepare for a little pain so make sure he makes you very wet before hand

good luck ! oh and protection use a condom dont want no diseases XD

[EvilEvilKitten]

ALWAYS please remember that just because some guy may want you to do something - it is NEVER mandatory that you do it.

It is YOUR body - YOU make the decision.

[Brandye]

Read the sticky "Am I Ready for Sex?" The social and psychological factors are even more important than the physical factors.

You say, "I am hopeless at this." In that case, you are not ready to do it.

Before becoming active, you should have rehearsed all the possible outcomes including saying. "Mum, I am pregnant." Do a role play with a friend and see how that feels.

[dancingdoc2]

Well...it has been five days and our o/p has not checked back in to comment, although, she may have read the thread without logging in. For her and others in the same situation reading this, let me offer some additional suggestions:

> 2. keep it simple (missionary basically)

Traditionally, the Missionary position has been the defacto standard, yet it is not necessarily the ideal first time or two position. The Woman Superior or Cowgirl position in which the woman straddles the man's torso facing him is much better for first-timers as explained in the linked discussions, above.

> 3. make sure your ok throughout the whole thing and any time u r uncomfortable get off and stop it.

How do you "get off" if you are "pinned" underneath? Otherwise, I agree.

> 4. make sure he is the right guy and you will have no regrets

Young and in love, the guy is pretty generally the "right guy" at that moment in time. It's only after the event that second thoughts might emerge.

Whether you are the girl or the boy in a similar situation, make sure you are making the decision to proceed for the right reasons and only at the right time. At anytime you remain unsure or uncertain about whether or not to do "it"--DON'T.

"But I love him" is not sufficient reason.
"I'm curious about intercourse" is insufficient reason.
"I want him to love me"....
"I to do this so he'll love me....
If you want to lose your virginity just to get it out of the way--wait.
Although, you may want to today or tomorrow, next week or next
month, the idea may not be that appealing. This comes from those
who did it and then years later wish that they had waited until they
really did find the right man based upon being more mature and having
a greater understanding of themselves and life in general.

I'm not saying never to this, just bide your time for awhile. You will be a much different person in a year or two than you are today. You will develop a different perspective of the world and your place in it and most likely will have a much different opinion of who you are. Also consider that with teens, especially, young loves come and go and rarely are the fellas you later marry.

If a boyfriend is pressuring you or cajoling you to have sex with him, I say don't do it unless and until you see good reason for you to do it--not him. As I said, above, a young horny guy with raging hormones will say and do about anything in order to see you naked and then get his rocks off, often at your emotional expense.

A couple can have great sex without intercourse!

Consider that nimble fingers, supple lips, and, a dexterous tongue can excite either of you during Foreplay to a level of excitement and passion beyond what is usual as a result of being stimulated vaginally. As good as an orgasm is from vaginal stimulation, a great hand job with oral, is often much more intense. NOTE: Fellas, do not dismiss or overlook the fact that for females of the species, a great hand job is how they achieve orgasms most of the time--even during intercourse!, so why not you at this stage of life?

If you are a fella reading this awaiting and anticipating your first time, please understand that many girls have yet to learn to masturbate and climax. So, while the act itself may be enjoyable, pleasurable it may not be. Why? because very often the first few times a woman has intercourse it is not always a comfortable experience. Even if she has learned to masturbate and climax as a result, it most likely won't happen the first few times she has intercourse.

To any and all of you reading this thread and planning what to do, please go to the Index at the top of the main screen and read the articles from top to bottom a couple of times. Knowledge is empowering, and there is much there to acquire.

[YHeloThar]

If you aren't sure then you shouldn't do it. This is coming from a 24 year old guy that used to be all about converting virgins.

Then I realized what I had done in a few cases. There were girls that were nice girls that really liked me, and I basically used them for sex and didn't go out with them afterwards. And their either became really depressed at having lost something they valued (virginity) or became huge sluts and ruined their lives drinking (at least for a couple years).

I would say don't do it unless you are sure that he values your virginity as much as you do (pretty impossible for a guy that age to do unless he is either a liar or really cares about you).