Do women really want to have sex and please men

[wet_suit_one]

I know many women do, heck probably all the women who post here, but I mean women in society generally?

The question arose when I googled the question "Why men pay for sex."

I find the responses to the question from women and men quite telling.

It seems that women generally resent that men can pay for sex and it seems that men generally simply want sex. As one commentator said, (Josey Vogels) "maybe men go to prostitutes because they can't seduce their wives for some reason."

An interesting comment as it seems to me, why should a man have to seduce his wife? She's his wife isn't she? Sex comes with marriage right? (which is often not the case, which is one of the reason that men pay for sex. That said I know that to expect sex in marriage is just stupid, it doesn't work that way.)

So I'm curious about what folks here think. Do women (in general society, not amongst posters here) really want to please men sexually?

Do tell...

[boringkitten]

So I am obviously not as sexually endowed as many people on this site (my name makes it obvious), but I really wanted to answer your question. I know you said in general, but I am a pretty general person. I do have sex just to get my guy off and it makes me very happy. All of my relationships I would have sex to get my guy off. I find it exciting to get him off and I think it is just part of a give and take relationship. I also have sex with my guy pretty much whenever I know he wants to. I think of it this way. I would not be impressed if I wanted to have sex and he said no, so when he wants to I am usually game even if it means just getting him off.

[Brandye]

First reason I have sex is to please me. Second, to please a partner. I can take great pleasure from pleasing a paertner even when I am not interested in orgasm for myslef. I can get very disturbed, however, when some guy leaves me high and dry to finish myself.

Judging from my (mostly female) patients' comments, some really like it; some tolerate it and some are looking for excuses to not participate. I have no idea what the genral population of women thinks. I do know that roughly a quarter have never experienced orgasm. And many of these really do not care.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Women are not taught to enjoy sex as sex. They are taught to use sex as a tool to please, control, and manipulate men. While this may have recently changed in sex education - it has NOT changed in our cultures.

Some of us have 'broken through' and have embraced our full sexuality but most, sadly, have not.

[wet_suit_one]

I fear you are all too correct EEK...

[Buck Naked]

I think the bigger question here is "Do men really want to please women?".

Too many of my friends think sex in a marriage is a given. They honestly think their wives should fall down with there legs in the air when they feel the urge. Honestly, they sicken me. I work very hard to give my wife the same level of satisfaction that she gives me. There is no way I can, but I do my best. Her sex drive is lower then mine at this point in our marriage, but I expect as we age that will flip and I hope I'm as good to her as she's been to me.

My point is that women are not here for our pleasure. This is a two way street. If men (in general) were more willing to please their partners, then the act wouldn't be a chore for the women.

In my opinion, if a married man is going to pay for sex he has failed to fulfill his duties in his marriage.

[JanetCGMP]

Originally Posted by EvilEvilKitten

Women are not taught to enjoy sex as sex. They are taught to use sex as a tool to please, control, and manipulate men. While this may have recently changed in sex education - it has NOT changed in our cultures.

Some of us have 'broken through' and have embraced our full sexuality but most, sadly, have not.

That seems to be my experience as well, at least here in North America, how about others from different parts of the world?

[Ratach]

Originally Posted by Buck Naked

I think the bigger question here is "Do men really want to please women?".

Too many of my friends think sex in a marriage is a given. They honestly think their wives should fall down with there legs in the air when they feel the urge. Honestly, they sicken me. I work very hard to give my wife the same level of satisfaction that she gives me. There is no way I can, but I do my best. Her sex drive is lower then mine at this point in our marriage, but I expect as we age that will flip and I hope I'm as good to her as she's been to me.

My point is that women are not here for our pleasure. This is a two way street. If men (in general) were more willing to please their partners, then the act wouldn't be a chore for the women.

In my opinion, if a married man is going to pay for sex he has failed to fulfill his duties in his marriage.

I agree one hundred percent. If my partner is not getting off, I'm not doing my job. That's my personal opinion on the matter, so take it with a grain of salt, but still... Too many people are concerned with their own pleasure too care about the person they are with. I know from experience. Ask me about it sometime.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Naturally, there must be mutual pleasure involved and since I have yet to meet a man who DIDN'T make it his business to please, unlike many women I know, I went with the culture and the education angle.

[mikkiji]

With my late wife, although we could enjoy a very mutually satisfying sex life, and she was very orgasmic with me and could easily be brought to climax over and over, she seldom was really interested in pleasing me beyond, "put it in and get it over with" after HER pleasure. I guess she felt ANY sex with her should be considered a bonus for me. And although during our 34 years together we did go through some very sexually exciting and adventurous periods of time (role play, dress up, watching porn, light bondage, etc.), she was often interested only in getting HER rocks off, and whatever I did or didn't feel was my affair. This was an emotional as well as physical attitude--she loved me dearly, but seemed to not love pleasing me, although she certainly loved being pleased by me, especially orally. She never reciprocated that, however. So saying that if a man would be more interested in pleasing his woman, the woman would be more interested or enthusiastic in pleasing him, is not always true.
Michael