How to make him come crawling....

[lovinsexmac]

I have been with my boyfriend for two years now and our sex life has been slowly decreasing, I'm not sure why. I know he's not cheating on me but we only have sex around twice a week if that and it's only on the weekends. I have been working out lately to lose weight and get back in shape and have been feeling better about myself. He has been more cuddly with me since my weight drop but our sex life is still low. What could be causing this problem and how do I get him to where he wants me so much that he can't stand it?
Thanks in advance...

[Rouge]

Have you two talked about it at all?

[lovinsexmac]

I really don't know what to say to him. I'm kind of afraid that his answer will be that he's not attracted to me anymore, and also I'm afraid that he'll do the whole, " I don't know" answer. I wonder also if it is because in the past this happend and I wanted it more than him and when I came onto him he would deny me, and I decided that I would no longer come onto him because of the denial and embarassment. I just don't know how to deal with this and I don't know what to do.

[Rouge]

The first thing that you have to do is talk to him about it. In any relationship, communication is key regardless of the answer. I understand your worry about the attraction, but if he isn't anymore, you guys have more than this to talk about.

Chances are though that something totally unrelated might be bothering him. We women have a habit of blaming ourselves, when we aren't actually the issue. If you two talk about it, I'm sure everything will be ok.

Make sure to approach him calmley though.

[EvilEvilKitten]

After two years, most likely he's comfortable in the relationship, relaxed around you and doesn't feel he has to "win" you or "prove" himself by having sex with you every 30 minutes. He's just happy and settled. You'll have to ask him. NO, it might have nothing to do with you or your weight.

As to the other www.wickedwomangroup.us has excellent information on how to make men crave you and your attention.

[lovinsexmac]

Evil thanks for the link, I got some good advice and I think that I might use it on him this weekend for his Valentines gift. It think he'll really enjoy it. Thanks!

[Ducy]

Perhaps have him go to the doc and have some blood work done. Im only 19, but I have dealt with hormone problems before. I used to be a typical teen, then I just stopped wanting it altogether. Come to find out it was really low test levels.

[lovinsexmac]

Ducy, lastnight I was in the mood and he said that he wasn't and because he was old. He's only 29, not old. He also said that maybe he needs to find something that will bring his testosterone up. I now know it's not me, it's something physical. Thanks.

[maxrep]

At 29 I doubt there is any decline in testosterone levels but maybe. He should be in his prime. Get some blood work done. What are your social activities? Smoke and drink a lot? Heavy pot smoker? Try exercising, vitamin supplementation and eating better also.

[dancingdoc2]

Originally Posted by lovinsexmac

I really don't know what to say to him.

Just sit him down at a time when the two of you are not planning to be intimate and ask those questions that are puzzling you. BE CERTAIN to do so in a manner that he will not perceive as an attack. Tell him you to help find answers and in so doing you are absolutely not threatening his ego or attacking is manhood. Ask him to help. Encourage him to open up.

I'm kind of afraid that his answer will be that he's not attracted to me anymore, and also I'm afraid that he'll do the whole, " I don't know" answer.

OK, so what is worse, hearing an answer or going on without any answers?
If he says he doesn't know, ask him if the relationship is still important to him, why it is important to you, and why you need help understanding why he has disconnected himself. If he won't, then you have two options: stay or leave. Which is worse, staying with the status quo or leaving to pursue other more beneficial relationships?

You seem to be stuck in the proverbial I would much rather be with the devil I know than in finding a prince I don't know.

I wonder also if it is because in the past this happend and I wanted it more than him and when I came onto him he would deny me, and I decided that I would no longer come onto him because of the denial and embarassment. I just don't know how to deal with this and I don't know what to do.

We are not mind readers. Please try and have a discussion with him.
Are you talking about the same guy, or two different people?

> lastnight I was in the mood and he said that he wasn't and because he was old.

This is a poor attempt to dodge the bullet. Perhaps he is no longer into you. If this is the case, then why is he staying with you? Could it be that he is getting his basic needs taken care of like laundry and meals?