Hand Jobs 101

[Stephanie083099]

####, I feel bad for you, see I know how to control myself, if I am getting too much into it where I can't handle it anymore, what I do is just stop for jerking him off for a second, then continue.

[Vixen916]

my thoughts on it are, if it feels dry, don't do it or stop. that needs to be the key. for me, i know when a guy or myself even, touches 'down there' if i am not wet, it hurts to touch my clit... so if i dont have lube, i dont try to give handjobs... i dont like the pain dryness causes and wouldnt want to be the one causing the same pain to someone else!

[Hello]

my girlfriend regularly jerks me off while its dry, and its not a problem, the idea is to use a completley differenet technique, instead of gripping the penis, the hand needs to be light around it, and move and rub it gently, the more pressure used, the more it rubs, and this is what hurts.

[driver_c5]

I have NOT tried this... but I saw a detailed article (sorry can't remeber where) about using a banana or some other kind of south american style banana. You cut off the end and get all the "fruit" out of the skin... then well... you use it as a fake vagina.

Sounds crazy to me, and I'm not rushing out to the store to get a banana... but it does answer your question.

[Lo Lo]

so many men have said they've had bad experiences, or hand-jobs that are painful. Tell us what not to do.

[girlygirl]

I don't have the equipment to receive a bad handjob, but I can tell you what I've learned from giving bad handjobs. Not using lube can be painful, especially if he is circumcised. Also, squeezing too tightly can hurt, although I've found that different guys prefer different amounts of squeezing.

[Brauul]

That is the trick really. Most men don't like to critique because I would imagine that they think it makes their partner feel like they don't know what they are doing (especially if they have done handjobs before and think they are really good at them). I think it all comes down to personal preference. You have to comunicate (duh). Tell your partner what feels good. Some guys like rhythm (either fast or slow) or they like a very strong grip and very deliberate motion. Or some like things soft and gentle. I would imagine a universal thing would probably be to have soft hands (I don't think anyone likes rough calus-laden hands) but other than that, I think most everything else is just personal preference. From my little teeny tiny bit of expererience in a sexual relationship, comunication and listening (and trying to do what they suggest) is key. never EVER take a bad experience and connect it completely with something. Always either talk about it or try and work it out in your own way (with everything). Hehe sorry to go ballistic on such a simple question. I just think that the answer is a bit more complicated.

[cool macs]

Pain during had jobs usually comes from a few things...

1) Lack of Lubrication
2) Tugging too hard
3) Too tight of a grip
4) Scratching
5) Direclty touching the glans head

Since the penis self lubricates to some degree, this usually isn't much of a problem, a little lube, or even saliva could do the trick thoguh.

Tugging too hard shouldn't be too hard to avoid... if you are on the down stroke, and the skin isn't moving anymore, lighten up the grip... The skin on the shaft connects to the glans head and the feeling having these too seperate isn't pleasurable.

Grip can be anywhere from loose to firm, depending on the technique being used...

Nails are never a good idea, a penis is similiar to a balloon in nature, why risk poking holes?

and finally the glans head sensetivity... for different reasons and much like a clit, the glans head can be too intense to touch directly, and can end up feeling like pain. This happens less and less as a penis gets desensitized from use, though it can happen right after an orgasm...

[Anya]

It's been my experience that different guys like different things. What might hurt one guy might really get another guy off. My last partner liked a lot of lube and a really tight grip when I jerked him off, my boyfriend now only likes a really light touch with no lube, anything else hurts him.

I guess you could say different strokes for different folks.

[Rawbob]

All i can add to the list of VERY WELL written replys is this, SHOW HER YOURSELF!

One of the best ways to instruct is to demonstrate! If you want to get a great handjob from your partner, have him/her sit back and watch you masterbate. They'll be able to see your technique, speed, amount of lubrication (if any) and of course, and other things you do when you masturbate (play with your balls, anus, nipples, etc).

Not only will she/he get a full view of how you do what you do, you'll also expand your sexual horizons into voyeurisim/exhibitionism!