Hand Jobs 101

[amy4stewie]

Ive given my boyfriend a hand job twice now -
First time he had a go at me because i pulled the foreskin down to much and apparently that just turned him off.
Second time i made him Cum - lots. =]

My question is - what can i do to make it not so boring?
He says its great but its seriously boring for me!

[James2007]

without reading other posts....

IMO... girls are not very good at giving wanks/hand jobs. To me they cause to much pain.

The fact is we grew up wanking, so we know what we like when it comes to it... but girls just dont do it so good for me everytime its painfull an I jus cant wait for them to stop... I even forced the cum out so they'd get the message that im done lol

[xgx]

Lots of pages here so I didn't read it all. VERY important tip for girls though, once you get a certain technique/rhythm down, don't randomly stop. My girlfriend sometimes does it to me and it causes for things to take a lot longer (not that I usually mind heh). But if I'm building up the point of orgasm, and she stops even for a quick pause and then starts again, I'm back to square one and it has to start again. Hope that makes sense? lol Oh and don't be afraid to grib tightly and go fast!

[highschoolmale]

yeah, I didn;t read all of this, but when I'm getting a hand-job: here are soem things that really improove the experience:

1. If the guy's breatning changes, do not change your technique. You can feel free to speed up a little bit (not too much at once) but don't slow down, stop, or change position in any way, shape, or form.

2. Some guys (me included) like to thrust with their hips when they near orgasm. Don't be surprised, just keep going; it;s another sin that you're doing it right.

3. Always, always, always use some form of lubrication. Wet your ENTIRE HAND (palm and finger tips) with either a water-based lubricant, slaiva, or vaginal juices (don't let him "inside" without protection, just get your own fingers wet). If there are either unavalable, or there aren't enough of them, you can use a gentle bar soap such as dove or ivory, but be warned: it stings the guys urethera aftwewards, itusing that method too much will dry out his skin. The most important thing is: dry hands will cause chafing which is ridiculously uncomfortable and unsexy.

4. (this is mostly for amy4stewie) Girls, this may not be super-fun for you, but your boyfriend will most likey return the favor. If you're worried he won't, use your sexy voice and tell him that he'll "have to earn it."

The thing about manually stimulating your partner is that it's for them. For this small part of your sex life at least, knowing that you are pleasing your partner should be what makes you happy.

[CrAzY]

I got to say, I hate having anything down there myself. I like pleasing him. My boyfriend often seems to go into modes about it.
Sometimes he HATES hand jobs but as soon as I say I want to add lubricant or soemthing different, he completely changes and enjoys the whole thing, other nights he wants a bj. I bet if you just make a hand job more interesting, add a little spice, it wouldn't be declined.

[demonbuttercup]

Originally Posted by xgx

Lots of pages here so I didn't read it all. VERY important tip for girls though, once you get a certain technique/rhythm down, don't randomly stop. My girlfriend sometimes does it to me and it causes for things to take a lot longer (not that I usually mind heh). But if I'm building up the point of orgasm, and she stops even for a quick pause and then starts again, I'm back to square one and it has to start again. Hope that makes sense? lol Oh and don't be afraid to grib tightly and go fast!

It also helps if you are getting close to let us know.
Like the other night, I was giving my b/f one...and my arm was getting tired...so I switched hands..and then he tells me he was close =\
So I kept going...and that arm was getting tired...but this time he told me he was close and to keep going...so I kept going! even tho it felt like my arm was going to fall off LOL

So if you are getting really close... just say something like.. almost there, or keep going just like that... otherwise, we might not can tell from just body language, etc.

[dancingdoc2]

Originally Posted by highschoolmale

3. Always, always, always use some form of lubrication. Wet your ENTIRE HAND (palm and finger tips) with either a water-based lubricant, slaiva, or vaginal juices (don't let him "inside" without protection, just get your own fingers wet). If there are either unavalable, or there aren't enough of them, you can use a gentle bar soap such as dove or ivory, but be warned: it stings the guys urethera aftwewards, itusing that method too much will dry out his skin. The most important thing is: dry hands will cause chafing which is ridiculously uncomfortable and unsexy.

To lube or not to lube is the question-

Answer: Either works and both provide their own unique set of sensations.

No lube generally means a tighter grip must be used; whereas a lubricant makes it possible to lightly glide over the surface of the skin not moving it within your grip (unless you want to squeeze and move the skin within your hand).

Do not use soap--

Even a mild soap is harsh and can cause irritation and chafing of the skin. A temporary solution, literally, can be made by adding a few drops of hair conditioner into a dish of tepid water and diluting it.

While you can moisten your entire hand, it is often only necessary to lubricate the thumb and forefinger if you are stroking the shaft and Glans with just those fingers.

Originally Posted by Crazy

I bet if you just make a hand job more interesting, add a little spice, it wouldn't be declined.

Jackinworld is in my opinion the preeminent site on male masturbation. Here is a link to their site map page. To learn about a variety of hand job techniques, please read the How-to and Advanced sections.

There is also a chapter on making your own lubricants.

Jackinworld/Site Map

Originally Posted by amy4stewie

My question is - what can i do to make it not so boring? He says its great but its seriously boring for me!

Me, meaning him or you?

For plenty of hand job techniques, please read through the how-to and advanced sections and try one or more that interest one or the other of you.

Also, combine a hand job with oral stimulation in what I refer to as the "Dynamic Duo". It ought to be very difficult to remain bored with all this action, even if its been done dozens of times before.

Is his bordom coming from a lack of creativity and involvement or a Type A personality? If the latter, his bordom probably has more to do with his lack of involvement and exploration than with anything you may or may not be doing.

Originally Posted by Isabel

I find it so hard to keep the motion going when giving him a hand job, and my hand cramps up so unbelievably fast. It makes it much harder to do.

Boys just discovering masturbation right out of puberty have this problem. Fatigue extends to the wrist and arm as well. What you are experiencing is a lack of muscle tone as you are using your muscles in ways they are not accustomed to. Practice will condition them and build strengh and endurance. Hang in there and keep on keeping on.

Originally Posted by demonbuttercup

It also helps if you are getting close to let us know.

YUP! I've written time and time again about how important communication is. In this case, communication equates to Feedback. When we masturbate we benefit from an internal feedback that lets us modulate our movements and make tiny midcourse corrections along the way. When we turn the reins over to someone else, we no longer benefit from this internal connection.

To fix this, a couple must work out some key words or utterances; or, use non-verbal feedback in the form of some body language (like a squeeze of the hand or a fast rubbing or perhaps a gentle tap) that convey specific meanings. Of course what works for the gander also works for the goose.

When getting close, feedback is crucial because you need time to get into position for intercourse without loosing it. If receiving oral stimulation, she needs the information in order to change tactics on how she might want to finish you off; or, to remove her mouth if desired.

Originally Posted by James2007

IMO... girls are not very good at giving wanks/hand jobs. To me they cause to much pain.

Please read the following:
How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?

[QUOTE=Newtolove] ball play feels great and should not be too tiring

Please read the following:
"Playing Ball" and How To Tips for Prostate Massage

[sweetiepiecpl]

I disagree that a guy can do a better job of wanking off by himself.
Part of a good hand job is one hand on the shaft and one on the scotum,
which is difficult to do to yourself. Also, lubrication on the entire gental area increases the pleasure.

[A_bit_new]

Ok i have kind of a problem my girlfriend just gave me a handjob and it was her first time as well as mine.. how can i teach her or idk give her tips on how to do it... and would it be better if she used a lube like lotion? she says she has a hard time actualy moving her hand without moving the skin on my penis and i tell her to grab a little lighter and go down harder but she cant grasp it (pardon the pun) she also doesnt really want to see my penis so how can i help her out without actually masturbating in front of her? i tried guiding her hand but didnt work out so well

ps she wont touch my testicles or scrotum

[xgx]

"she also doesnt really want to see my penis"... huh?