sexually shy GF. Help!

[monkey]

Hi,

I,ve been seeing my gf on+off for 5yrs and we love each other very much. Problem is that she is very shy when it comes to her furry bits! She finds the whole sex thing a bit disgusting, and im sure only does it to please me. Don't get me wrong, she does enjoy sex and loves me playing with fingers but she would never let me see, let alone kiss her down there. I've been told that i'm very good in that area by other women, so it's very frustrating that she won't let me please her like that. The odd occasions that i have managed to get down there she has loved it??
I've tried talking to her but she never gives me a proper answer.

The cunnilingus is just one example. Is there a way i can get her to become more exited about sex, and willing to try 'new' things without sounding like a sex crazed perv??

Any help would be much appreciated.

[Rawbob]

I think in order to help answer your questions, it would help to konw how old u both are, if u live together, or still at home, and a bit about your background.

Usually when someone acts the way you say your GF does, it comes down to religion and/or upbrining.

If her mom and/or sisters always said that sex before marriage was a sin, or that oral sex on a woman is dirty, etc, that can have a profound impact on the way she views sex. And the fact that you think she's doing it "for you" validates that not only is something going on inside her head, but that it's VERY UNLIKELY that she's really enjoying it.

TALK TO HER! Spend as much time talking about sex as you do THINKING about sex...and you'll be surprised how much BETTER your sex will be! And don't just talk about HAVING sex, but how it makes her feel, what she was taught about sex, etc.

Trust me, this will pay dividends!

[moonflower]

Rawbob you took the words out of my mouth or in this case keyboard. *I agree 100%. *I had hang ups about sex, I still did it with my now Husband and lets just say a few before him, but I mentally had hang ups. *After we were married and it was "OK" it was like night and day. *I am not saying get married and it will fix the problem I am saying you should talk about it and Rawbob is right the more you talk about sex the easier it is to talk about sex and the more open sex becomes. *Sure at first the most you might get out of her is a nod or giggles but she will come around. *IF you drink try talking to her after a glass of wine or a beer. *If you are not 21 yet forget I said that.lol

[monkey]

thanks guys. I'm 23 and she is 22. I read the post on foreplay and there seems to be some good advice on that.

Another problem is that she is away at uni at the moment so i only see her every fortnight which means its hard to talk on the phone. Whenever i do try and talk about it she always seems to get uncomfy and a bit peed off that i'm bringing it up. How can i talk to her without her thinking that i'm being dirty and that i have a one track mind!!

Also,how can i get her to become excited when talking to her on the phone. Not phone sex, but just to get her thinking about it? I'm seeing her this w'end so would love to put something into practice.

[JBClvrGirl]

Im in a long distancce relationship, so we talk on the phone a lot. If your talking about he next time your gonna see each other, just say something like" you know what i would do if i was with you right now?..." and start telling her. but go slow, dont just say im gonna put my had in your pants and finger you. Say everything as small as how your gonna kiss her, and where,. you have to build up to it. Then when you get the the action, describe everything you doing and how. And if shes a little up tight about things down there, say a little bit about how you love this and that about her and how things feel... i think you get the picture. have fun.