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As everyone else has said, take it slow. The mind can be a hard thing to change and especially when it comes to the masturbation thought. I myself didn't really try it till earlier this year when I got my first boyfriend. When he thought I had and tried to on me..I had to stop him cause I was uncomfortable. But over the months I've let him do more and more. Its been together that we've gotten over the hurdles in masturbation and everything. Hopefully, you've stuck it through seeing as the main post was 3 years ago.lol. But to everyone I say go slow. If you have a great relationship outside the sack...don't ruin it by trying to speed things up in the sack.
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Cool macs, I used to be that way. I didn't even know what a clit was until I got married! It took my hubby some time.. when he would he would just put my hand on top of his and after a few tries, at his urging, I would take over.. I've only tried the one toy.. and that was during one of the few times he went down on me (I'm still shy with that one!), he snuck in the vibrator. It's one of my favorites now and I'll try anything once... so Good luck.
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Semantic issue re masturbation
[QUOTE=I still regard masturbation as a personal act]END QUOTE
BY DEFINITION, masturbation is SELF-generated genital stimulation to orgasm WITHOUT a partner. Get it? WITHOUT A PARTNER. Stimulating the genitalia of a partner needs another name because that is NOT "masturbation". You do NOT "masturbate each other". Such are the limits of the English language! If you and a partner stimulate your own genitals in front of each other, I call that 'voyeuristic masturbation'. Apparently this practice has its devotees. Okay. Whatever. But if I have my hands on a man that I desire, I want his hands on me, NOT mine, and I want my hands on him, NOT his. Watching a man 'play with himself' does nothing for me. Fortunately no one has ever asked me to observe this or to provide a similar observation for him. This is not to criticize but to CLARIFY. |
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Some things need to go slow ... if and/or when she does open to the idea, you want her to enjoy it! You don't want her to feel bitter & resentful for doing something she didn't/doens't feel comfortable doing
I was molested as a small child & masturbation is EXTREMELY difficult for me -- even more difficult is explaining why Only because my BF is so gentle, so patient, so understanding am I finally beginning to want to try it & yet I still end up dissociating (leaving my body) ... my reflexive response to the trauma & this is when I'm alone -- I am no where near trying to masturbate in front of him!But this doesn't mean I don't hope to -- I do want to ... however, that desire gets squashed under any pressure from him to do so ![]() |
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