Do many women withhold sex to gain power?

[GaryRed]

This comes from the Manchester Evening News:

Women "withhold sex" to gain power

July 01, 2004

WOMEN are using the bedroom to gain the upper hand in relationships but are not necessarily satisfied when they get there, according to a study published today.

Modern living has meant around half the women questioned in a poll said they were often too tired for sex.

Yet even when they are in the mood, 40% admitted refusing sex with their partner because they were angry with them and 19% did the same "to be in control".

[Rouge]

If they really wanted to be in control, they'd be giving them mind-blowing sex that leaves them so weak in the knees that they're kneeling for more. IMO, saying you want to be in control and not having sex is a lazy way to get out of it. Take a violent dog off a leash in a playground, why don't you. He'll go get a new chew toy for sure.

As for 'denying sex when in the mood', They must not really want it. If I'm in the mood, my man knows that he'd better be compliant and do as told, and nearly nothing will be able to kick that mood until I've been taken care of (except for a pregnancy scare....that dropped my mood to nil).

[funinthesun]

If you make your sex life into a commodity and treat the relationship as a business deal, then that is what you get. I don't see why it should be a surprise for those that do this that it isn't satisfying.

[EvilEvilKitten]

YEAH! Duh!

Women will withhold anything to get power if they want power.

Even if they have sex, they will NOT have an orgasm - and so rob their partners of the pleasure of pleasing them.

Or they will not do certain sexual things... etc. etc. etc.

BTW men do they same thing.

[headhead]

Originally Posted by EvilEvilKitten

Even if they have sex, they will NOT have an orgasm - and so rob their partners of the pleasure of pleasing them.... BTW men do they same thing.

I've never withheld an orgasm to rob my partner of the pleasure of pleasing me.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Did not say YOU did. I said some women do.

[lnt1103]

Originally Posted by headhead

I've never withheld an orgasm to rob my partner of the pleasure of pleasing me.

I once was with a guy that did. Of course he never admitted that was why, and I didn't see it at the time. I was just learning BJs and had yet to finish him without him stepping in by hand. He could tell that doing so was an ambition of mine.

Hindsight is 20/20. I now realize it was a blatant manipulative move on his part. But I discovered later that he was also a shithead addict. They're good at being manipulative.

[headhead]

Maybe I'm dense, but I don't get it. What was he accomplishing?

[lnt1103]

Getting me to keep trying and keeping my self-esteem so low that I stayed with him instead of being alone, even though he didn't deserve me. See, I'm a pleaser by nature. By not allowing me to accomplish my goal of finishing him, he kept me feeling unworthy, which kept me attached to him, and kept me trying.

This wasn't him simply not coming. This was, one unsuccessful time that I tried, he heard me mutter 'Cmon' under my breath and said incredulously, 'you WANT it to come???' Next time I tried, he actually STOPPED me. This was blatant.

[EvilEvilKitten]

I'm NOT a pleaser by nature but I like to play fair. If a man refused to orgasm - the reason is immaterial to me - I'll make him orgasm even if I have to resort to the "bull method" of sticking an electrode up his butt and jazzing him with a bit of current - bingo!

Gentlemen - don't make me play rough. Take it like a man and give it up!