Promise Rings

[sera300]

Last I knew the only near "promise to marry" was called an engagement ring followed by setting a date in the near future. The rest in just childish.

[cyclefreak]

Originally Posted by EvilEvilKitten

Mainly because people bandy words like slut and skank about, avoid their responsibilities by making abstinence the only sex education available, and by teaching them nothing about the real world regarding sex and it proper management - is why this whole promise ring thing is obscene.

Actually, I don't think people use those sort of terms as much these days. Its been years since I've actually heard someone describe a woman as a 'slut'. I seem to recall hearing those terms used much more frequently 35-40 years ago than now. I think attitudes have changed a lot, and it is more accepted now that people may be sexually active when they are young. (I'm talking about the way it seems to me in Australia, of course.)

[EvilEvilKitten]

It used to mean something like that, Sera. A soldier, wishing to give himself something to live for, would give a promise ring to the lady he left behind - meaning to wed her upon his safe return from war. The promise was that they would keep chaste while they were apart. This was not an 'engagement' which involved the families, just a promise between themselves - nothing formal about it.

As you can see, this 'promise' once a vow between lovers, has evolved into something more pernicious.

[don't_understand]

Originally Posted by cyclefreak

Actually, I don't think people use those sort of terms as much these days. Its been years since I've actually heard someone describe a woman as a 'slut'. I seem to recall hearing those terms used much more frequently 35-40 years ago than now. I think attitudes have changed a lot, and it is more accepted now that people may be sexually active when they are young. (I'm talking about the way it seems to me in Australia, of course.)

Cyclefreak, in the original post is says that Jordin Sparks used the word slut at the award ceremony.

[lnt1103]

When I was in high school, girls would get 'promise rings' from their boyfriends as a step down from an engagement ring. Kind of like in the Gidget era when guys would 'pin' their girlfriends. Had to do with commitment to the relationship, not abstinence. While I can see how the leap there is made, my choice to abstain for as much of my life as I did, had nothing to do with any promise I made to my parents or anyone else. It was my own decision based on my own motives and thought processes. I honestly don't think my mother could have stomached the conversation necessary to request that promise. She couldn't bring herself to discuss birth control options with me when I decided to get my IUD.

[smallestoftheclan]

I had one of those, I wore it on my right hand not the left. I only wore the one for the left hand when it was safe, my parents or other family members not seeing it.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Not for me! I discussed everything with my mother and got honest answers from her. There was absolutely no way she would let me do anything even remotely akin to a promise ring. My grandmother was on the school board at that time so I got REAL sex ed - not this watered down and purity filter stuff they feed kids nowadays.

Facts matter.

[wet_suit_one]

It's alarming how afraid people are of a basic function isn't it?

Why oh why can't people just grow up? I don't get it!?!?!?!?!?