Promise Rings

[wet_suit_one]

So goes the amazing stupidity that passes for morality. So incredibly dumb!!!

[Jonathan_Philips]

It's probably bullshit anyway - a marketing tool by Disney to appeal to the huge market that is the conservative right. Just look at Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake and their 'virginity'.

[lnt1103]

I'm not one to complain about anyone waiting until marriage if that's the choice they come to. Neither am I one to complain about not deciding in that direction. Mostly because I fall somewhere in between. I had planned to wait until my wedding night. I wore it like a badge of honor-I had heard a statistic that 95% do it before marriage and I was proud of myself for holding out among the 5%. I was sticking to my guns and it felt good-it felt like a form of self-definition. And to a degree, maybe it was.

But when I was 28, that all changed. I thought I was ready and I thought it was right.

And I'm more than okay with the fact that I changed my mind. For one thing, because I am now more myself...more self-defined...than ever before. Someone said something to the effect of 'people get messed up either way'. This doesn't have to ruin people, whatever their choice. The key of it IMO is the permission to be HUMAN, and the ability to FORGIVE for what a person might possibly perceive as a mistake. And by the way, IMO the most difficult person in the WORLD from whom to obtain those two things, is ONESELF. But if you can master getting those two things from yourself, this decision doesn't have to cause so much inner conflict and pain.

[Spicygirl82]

I think it is ridiculous to call people who have sex before marriage sluts. Having sex before marriage does not make a person a slut. Being promiscuous is what makes a person a slut. At least that's my opinion.

As for promise rings, I don't really know what I believe about those. I guess they're ok if the teen chooses to be a virgin until marriage. However, if the teen is pressured in to not having sex before marriage by their parents, church, or whatever, I see that as wrong.

[xkatex]

I think the meaning of a "promise ring" has been changed over the years. People are starting to do it just to fit into a crowd or to, believe it or not, have bragging rights. Ive known a few people with promise rings and all they ever do is talk about how they CANT have sex before marriage because they have that ring, like it has supernatural powers over them.

A promise ring should be seen as an inner-self choice to refrain from having sex before marriage because YOU want to. Not because it seems like a good idea at the time.

just my two cents......

Oh also the issue with being a slut before your married? Thats just ridiculous. Maybe she worded her statement wrong or maybe she was serious, maybe its just another publicity stunt. But the fact of the matter, and we all clearly know it, is that having sex before marriage does NOT make you a slut.

[xkatex]

Originally Posted by Gorgeous Mistake

Its all the new Disney Channel... I miss the old Disney (mickey mouse, donald duck, goofy etc)

Their music is a pathetic excuse for "rock"

Completely agree with that one.

[somehearts]

It's easy enough to say you're going to wait when you're a teenager and if you find someone to marry in your early 20's. But what if you don't?

These young people sort of delude themselves into thinking that the perfect person is going to come along at exactly the right time and want to get married and life just isn't like that.

[cyclefreak]

Originally Posted by somehearts

It's easy enough to say you're going to wait when you're a teenager and if you find someone to marry in your early 20's. But what if you don't?

These young people sort of delude themselves into thinking that the perfect person is going to come along at exactly the right time and want to get married and life just isn't like that.

Exactly, that's the fundamental flaw in their argument.

[don't_understand]

My son promised his dad and I that he would talk to his dad before making any decisions about starting a sex life. At 12 I hope it is more than several more years before I get that call from his dad. They live in a small town so buying condoms at the local store would not only get back to his dad. His dad and I grew up there and the news made it back to my dad before his, we were seniors in high school, accepted at University of Wyoming, and put on close supervision. My ex was almost a hero for having the courage to go buy them. He didn't see my dad's best friend in the store, it was him that went and told my dad.
There were 3 girls in my class who were pregnant when we did graduate, I was still a virgin.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Promise rings are obscene. The entire idea of sex before marriage making you worth less as a person who doesn't is incredibly damaging - as if your only value was between your legs. Ignorance is NOT a virtue. But this is never spoken.

Promiscuity does not matter if undertaken for the right reason - which is that you enjoy sex. Sluts generally do enjoy sex. They tend to like their partners. They also tend to be really, really good at sex. Sluts are also usually very comfortable in their own skins and with their sexuality. With their level of experience, they also tend to not make boneheaded decisions when it comes to selecting their partners.

Promiscuity as a way of finding "true love" is the wrong reason. Seeking emotional validation in a physical act is NOT good and never works. These people ignore 'red flags', take up with unsuitable partners, endure abuse and jealousy thinking it means they care, and end up with hellish lives.

Mainly because people bandy words like slut and skank about, avoid their responsibilities by making abstinence the only sex education available, and by teaching them nothing about the real world regarding sex and it proper management - is why this whole promise ring thing is obscene.