Old-fashioned boyfriend...

[missyD]

I'm in a long-term relationship... and he is still waiting for marriage. I don't really want to wait, and when we are together, I know he doesn't either. Does anyone think that there's any way I could get it out of him? Is it offensive if all I want is to have him do what I know (and what he's admitted to) he wants?

For the record: we're not 16 year olds (in which case, waiting would be a novel idea) we're both at the brink of graduating college; also, he doesn't do any of the "alternatives," so when I say waiting for marriage, I mean for everything beyond kissing.

Thanks,
E

[cjb1981]

If that's what he says he wants, then respect his choice. Yes, I'm sure that he's horny and wants to have sex, but apparently his will is stronger than his hormones. I'm sure that if you really tried, you could, "get it out of him". However, he'd probably feel really bad about it afterwards. You have to ask yourself , is that's what you really want? There's nothing wrong with you wanting to have sex with him, but it sounds like he's just not ready for that, (there's nothing wrong with that either). Maybe it's time for you to move on, and find someone who is ready, if it's that important to you.

[Ducy]

Just discuss it with him, but be very careful here because should he say yes I want to, it could cause a lot of problems. LIke being horny and wanting to, or only doing it cuz you want.

If you really want to discuss this though, expect it to take a long time of deep convo because I made my mind up to wait till marraige, but when I decide to change my mind, it took me a good month or so of thinking bfore I made up my mind.

[Brandye]

I have to respect one who lives by his/her moral code. On the high side of twenty, I would want a test ride before making things permanent.

[sera300]

And you both are certain you are prepared if you marry and find out your not sexually compatible. As far as nothing more than a kiss, at your ages, are you certain you really belong together? And if you find out after marriage, you are not, are you willing to see alternatives?

[Master Bulldog]

In the mean time, the sale of "rampant rabbit" vibrators sky rockets...LOL

*Master Bulldog*

[EvilEvilKitten]

Do not marry a man you have not enjoyed sex with.

Sorry, but it is better to find if you are compatible BEFORE you marry him than AFTER you have married him.

[Contessa]

Um ... I probably sound retarded asking this, but I've only had one boyfriend with whom I haven't had sexual intercourse with yet ... what do you mean by sexual compatibility?

[Ducy]

Do your libidos match, do you light that fire deep inside him, and does he light yours?

Last thing you want is a guy who doesnt ever satisfy you, is selfish, etc.

At least I am guessing thats what EEK meant.

[sera300]

Originally Posted by Contessa

Um ... I probably sound retarded asking this, but I've only had one boyfriend with whom I haven't had sexual intercourse with yet ... what do you mean by sexual compatibility?

Marry a man who stands the test of time & no matter what wants/does have sex with you equally as often as you wish, you share the same enjoyment, and styles/adventure [willing to do new things when stagnant]. And you do the same for him. If not in the mood, you both compromise and help the other. If married for 50+ years, you still turn on the other & keep it going.