> we do "other things" but lately it seems a little bland i guess. dont get me wrong hj and bj are great and she does a good job. but frankly my brain is fried and im out of ideas.
Check out the preeminent site on male masturbation and techniques. Go the the site map page and click on advanced techniques. You will find descriptions and illustrations for using different "strokes".
Finally, I think the key word to your situation is "bland". It's not the making out that is the problem, it is in the lack of variety and technique.
* Begin setting the mood hours before any expected lovemaking
* Learn and work together to find out what each other likes and
does not and then explore new and creative ideas that you dream
up
* Devote no less than half an hour to making out and more if possible
As for finding suitable locations, well, I for one would not spend $200 on a hotel room unless the occasion was very very special. Find a Motel 6, Super 8 or some Ma & Pa local establishment with reasonable rates and clean rooms. One of the links has other warm weather ideas. Think bike trails, hiking trails, rivers, ponds, lakes, and groves of trees in some field. Think picnic basket, blankets, and pillows, just for openers. Then think and act on using protection for each of you if you do plan on having intercourse. I'd say to limit your activities to foreplay at the most for several months before ever considering intercourse, if ever at all.
(I'm the gf in question, if that's offers any clarity)
Thanks, doc. The city park has done wonders for us :).
And let me just say that the handjobs are anything but up-down-up-down. I really do try to do original things, but I don't have a creative mind, sexually.
Handjobs are about the flexible form of "doing him" giving great latitude for creativity and different effects. In my first several years of "sex" and with some great advice, I became a mistress of the handjob. A few decades later, I still have a partner who enjoys the surprises.
Using your panties is a turn on or a menstrual pad; surgical gloves with warmed lube; cuddling the scrotum while stroking; taking the results onto your breast; using nipples for additional stimulation; varying pressure and strangth of squeezing; tickling with your hair (ok, can cause a surprise but it brushes out after drying); between your breasts. Whatever comes to mind.
But also consider if he is getting bored while you are each living at home, what will be needed ten years from now to prevent wandering.
> the handjobs are anything but up-down-up-down. I really do try to do original things, but I don't have a creative mind, sexually.
This is good and also why I gave you two the link to the Jackinworld website.
Being creative and also exploring possibilities are two important aspects of a couple's lovemaking process. After doing more than just up-down-up-down and/or around and around and/or including oral, there is this point of fact:
When we first learn to masturbate each of us quickly
develops a routine for how we accomplish the deed
that we then rely upon. If we vary the mechanics of
rhythm, tempo, and pressure too much then the orgasm
will either not happen or it will be less than expected.
It is this "fine art" to the basic mechanics that must be
learned. So, ask him to show you how he masturbates
and then have him guide your hand with his several
times until you learn to mimic the technique that is
specific and unique to him. (The same holds true for
you with him!)
> I don't have a creative mind, sexually.
So far you have received an excellent resource and some great information to keep you going for awhile. One thing you can do that will increase his level of excitement and keep him hanging on the edge is to bring him to the brink of an orgasm and then pause just long enough for him to loose his sense of urgency. You can then repeat the process one or two more times before letting him finally enjoy his climax. This little bit of "torture" will drive him wild with desire. Now, having given you one insiders trick of the trade, let me state that this is not something you should do all the time because too much of a good thing can be a hugh turnoff.
Here is something else to mull over: Being creative is not just about the mechanics and the Fine Art, it is also about the preparation.
Each of you can learn to be creative thinkers when it comes to varying the way you make love and for things you do during. A creative thinking man might just want to plan ahead--perhaps a day rather than an hour. Why? In a word: "A N T I C I P A T I O N".
To whet a woman's interest and stir her excitement begin the process of enticement hours or a day before. As the guy, whisper sweet nothings in her ear and tell her you look forward to demonstrating how much these sweet nothings mean to you. Giving a romantic card is good. Hallmark will thank you. Hide love notes around the house. (My wife has an office so I sometimes go there and put little reminders in her desk to discover.) Giving a kiss and a lingering hug will set the stage and her mood for more--later. Calling her on the phone when you know she is not likely to be busy and then telling her what you plan to do later with perhaps some specifics, will more than get her motor running. So in sports parlance, this is all about the importance of the "wind-up" before the delivery. So this approach has dual benefits. On the one hand the man's effort and planning benefits the woman; on the other, it motivates and excites him.
So, for the two of you, now, don't just go to the park with the expectation that you will be making out--AGAIN. Go to the park with a plan and an exitement and a stirring in your loins that began hours before. The results will be significantly different--and that is all about the "delivery".
Lastly, what is good for the goose is also good for the gander. You can take him in your arms and whisper sweet nothings, or tell him on the phone and make turnabout fair play! where he spends his days thinking about what you have told him and perhaps what you have in store for him, later.
> we do "other things" but lately it seems a little bland i guess. dont get me wrong hj and bj are great and she does a good job. but frankly my brain is fried and im out of ideas.
Check out the preeminent site on male masturbation and techniques. Go the the site map page and click on advanced techniques. You will find descriptions and illustrations for using different "strokes".
www.jackinworld.com
Secondly, bland can be a problem at anytime during a couple's life together. It is not limited just to sex.
Check out my replies on this thread:
http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/pleasing_her/17486-fondling_doesnt_turn_...
Finally, I think the key word to your situation is "bland". It's not the making out that is the problem, it is in the lack of variety and technique.
* Begin setting the mood hours before any expected lovemaking
* Learn and work together to find out what each other likes and
does not and then explore new and creative ideas that you dream
up
* Devote no less than half an hour to making out and more if possible
As for finding suitable locations, well, I for one would not spend $200 on a hotel room unless the occasion was very very special. Find a Motel 6, Super 8 or some Ma & Pa local establishment with reasonable rates and clean rooms. One of the links has other warm weather ideas. Think bike trails, hiking trails, rivers, ponds, lakes, and groves of trees in some field. Think picnic basket, blankets, and pillows, just for openers. Then think and act on using protection for each of you if you do plan on having intercourse. I'd say to limit your activities to foreplay at the most for several months before ever considering intercourse, if ever at all.
(I'm the gf in question, if that's offers any clarity)
Thanks, doc. The city park has done wonders for us :).
And let me just say that the handjobs are anything but up-down-up-down. I really do try to do original things, but I don't have a creative mind, sexually.
Blackrose,
Handjobs are about the flexible form of "doing him" giving great latitude for creativity and different effects. In my first several years of "sex" and with some great advice, I became a mistress of the handjob. A few decades later, I still have a partner who enjoys the surprises.
Using your panties is a turn on or a menstrual pad; surgical gloves with warmed lube; cuddling the scrotum while stroking; taking the results onto your breast; using nipples for additional stimulation; varying pressure and strangth of squeezing; tickling with your hair (ok, can cause a surprise but it brushes out after drying); between your breasts. Whatever comes to mind.
But also consider if he is getting bored while you are each living at home, what will be needed ten years from now to prevent wandering.
> the handjobs are anything but up-down-up-down. I really do try to do original things, but I don't have a creative mind, sexually.
This is good and also why I gave you two the link to the Jackinworld website.
Being creative and also exploring possibilities are two important aspects of a couple's lovemaking process. After doing more than just up-down-up-down and/or around and around and/or including oral, there is this point of fact:
When we first learn to masturbate each of us quickly
develops a routine for how we accomplish the deed
that we then rely upon. If we vary the mechanics of
rhythm, tempo, and pressure too much then the orgasm
will either not happen or it will be less than expected.
It is this "fine art" to the basic mechanics that must be
learned. So, ask him to show you how he masturbates
and then have him guide your hand with his several
times until you learn to mimic the technique that is
specific and unique to him. (The same holds true for
you with him!)
> I don't have a creative mind, sexually.
So far you have received an excellent resource and some great information to keep you going for awhile. One thing you can do that will increase his level of excitement and keep him hanging on the edge is to bring him to the brink of an orgasm and then pause just long enough for him to loose his sense of urgency. You can then repeat the process one or two more times before letting him finally enjoy his climax. This little bit of "torture" will drive him wild with desire. Now, having given you one insiders trick of the trade, let me state that this is not something you should do all the time because too much of a good thing can be a hugh turnoff.
Here is something else to mull over: Being creative is not just about the mechanics and the Fine Art, it is also about the preparation.
Each of you can learn to be creative thinkers when it comes to varying the way you make love and for things you do during. A creative thinking man might just want to plan ahead--perhaps a day rather than an hour. Why? In a word: "A N T I C I P A T I O N".
To whet a woman's interest and stir her excitement begin the process of enticement hours or a day before. As the guy, whisper sweet nothings in her ear and tell her you look forward to demonstrating how much these sweet nothings mean to you. Giving a romantic card is good. Hallmark will thank you. Hide love notes around the house. (My wife has an office so I sometimes go there and put little reminders in her desk to discover.) Giving a kiss and a lingering hug will set the stage and her mood for more--later. Calling her on the phone when you know she is not likely to be busy and then telling her what you plan to do later with perhaps some specifics, will more than get her motor running. So in sports parlance, this is all about the importance of the "wind-up" before the delivery. So this approach has dual benefits. On the one hand the man's effort and planning benefits the woman; on the other, it motivates and excites him.
So, for the two of you, now, don't just go to the park with the expectation that you will be making out--AGAIN. Go to the park with a plan and an exitement and a stirring in your loins that began hours before. The results will be significantly different--and that is all about the "delivery".
Lastly, what is good for the goose is also good for the gander. You can take him in your arms and whisper sweet nothings, or tell him on the phone and make turnabout fair play! where he spends his days thinking about what you have told him and perhaps what you have in store for him, later.