Loosing virginity to fwb..?

[lnt1103]

Yeah don't start a game you're not prepared to play to the end.

This is part of my whole issue with FWB to begin with (and no, I'm not about to get on my horse about how I won't have sex uncommitted, which is admittedly the OTHER part of my issue. but that's a different discussion).

It's too easy for one partner or the other to change their position on the status of things, never before even realizing they need something more until it smacks them in the face broadside. And at that point, if communication isn't STELLAR, the two people get onto different pages and it runs the risk of getting disastrous.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Vanilla - stop being so...well..."vanilla" and THINK about this more thoroughly. If you dangle something desired in front of someone and say yes yes yes only to go no no no and take what is desired away (whether it is sex or chocolate cake or a job promotion) then you are a selfish, greedy prick/bitch.

Because you're breaking the ONE RULE : treat others as you would have them treat you.

To make it clear how important this is consider the latest findings from the social sciences - one of the five fundamental psychological patterns in the human brain FROM BIRTH is a "Sense of Fairness".

Play fair, people.

[RATED-RKOFRANKLIN]

Originally Posted by springfever

Am comfortable with the guy, and foreplay is...wow.

Basically part of me wants to hold on to my virginity, and the other part is soo damn horny, that justs want's to have sex. I don't want to regret loosing it. I figure my fwb will also just get frustrated if we only foreplay (but isn't preasuring me or anything).

I am almost 18, he is 21, what do people think?

What did you just say? You are a minor. He is an adult. Depending on your local laws, it is illegal for him to have sex with you.

[lnt1103]

It's not necessarily about one being a minor and the other not. The legality of it is more likely about age of consent in their state.

[VanellaSchnella]

Originally Posted by EvilEvilKitten

Vanilla - stop being so...well..."vanilla" and THINK about this more thoroughly. If you dangle something desired in front of someone and say yes yes yes only to go no no no and take what is desired away (whether it is sex or chocolate cake or a job promotion) then you are a selfish, greedy prick/bitch.

Because you're breaking the ONE RULE : treat others as you would have them treat you.

To make it clear how important this is consider the latest findings from the social sciences - one of the five fundamental psychological patterns in the human brain FROM BIRTH is a "Sense of Fairness".

Play fair, people.

Well it is her job to communicate to him that she doesnt want sex and just wants to be fwb. If he doesnt like that then its time to stop all together. Also I would never expect a girl to give up her virginity just because we had been fooling around...if she had had sex with a lot of other guys I guess that would be different as in I might expect it. Maybe guys should understand that if the girl doesnt want to have sex it means she doesnt want to have sex. If a girl told me that I wouldnt push the issue, depending on the situation I may find another girl but I wouldnt push the issue. See I do treat others as I would want to be treated..I don't wanna anyone to push me or expect me to do anything that I'm not sure I wanna do.

[lnt1103]

The reality is, most consider sex one of the benefits.

[VanellaSchnella]

Originally Posted by lnt1103

The reality is, most consider sex one of the benefits.

Thats why it needs to be discussed..not all consider it to be that way.

[Rouge]

I'm quite sure that he'd be able to find someone else to play with. If they stay in this thing, both are going to be unsatisfied, and neither is really accomplishing anything. She's not getting a relationship or bonding or whatever, and he's not getting sex, which is the basis of a FWB relationship.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Excuse me but YES the difference between "friends" and "friends with benefits" is exactly SEX. That is precisely what benefits means. Otherwise they'd just be friends.

Now if it was JUST all about sex and nothing more then they'd be 'fuckbuddies' which is basicly "thank you now get the hell out."

to recap:

friends = no sex
fuckbuddy = sex partner but not friend
friend with benefits = both friend and sex partner.

Like it or not - those are the definitions.
Are we all clear about this?

[Manimal]

I'd love to find a virgin to have sex with, i think that would be cool