bad experience... please help.

[stuart1993]

hi im 14 and my girlfriend is 13. as young as we are we have been together throughout most of primary school and even as we have aged into high school and we have now moved on. as young people do we went out one night and got drunk on a street. she asked me to ave sexual intercourse with her, we did so in a field but something wasnt right. i put on a condom and we started but after about 1 nd a half minutes she started to bleed heavily from her vagina. what is this and what should i do? are we just to young? i havent spoken to my gf in four days i i dont wanna loose her over this =[

thankyou for reading.

[dancingdoc2]

Yes, you are just too young. Have you had "the talk" with your parents? You and your friend need more information about sex and all that before you engage in adult behavior. The fact that you are asking now is great. This site has lots of information concerning all facets of human behavior, sexual behavior, dating, etc. The fact that you are asking now also shows that you do not have the information you need before fooling around.

What do you know about birth control? Are you aware that having intercourse results in a baby more often than not, particularly within the teenage years? If you are not using a condom then you are not looking out for A#1--you; and, you are placing your friend's life and wellbeing at risk.

The bleeding is basic female physiology that you should learn about in any Sex Ed. class or from your folks or some other adult responsible for you.

While you can ejaculate and her body may appear mature, in fact her body is far from developed. Having sex and chancing a baby at her young age potentially place her at great risk. Is she using some form of birth control? If not, she also needs to look out for and protect A#1--her, by being on the pill, using a spermicide, or using some other reliable contraceptive in addition to your condom.

I know having an orgasm feels fantastic, yet you should be asking yourself if you really want intercourse at this point. Why does she want intercourse? More than likely she is preorgasmic and will not have orgasms for quite awhile. If you want to do anything, then look through the Index and read the articles on dating, kissing, and making out. I recommend if you do anything you do not go any further than Foreplay and then not for quite a while. Making out is done in progressive stages, you should not take the plunge all at once, rather work up to more and more intimacy over several weeks/months.

Got questions? Please do not hesitate to ask.

[Gorgeous Mistake]

Oh guys... don't have sex drunk ,especially not at 13 and 14.

[Mr. Saint]

I thought I was young to loose my virginity before I came to this form. I have to second what Gorgeous Mistake said. Drinking and having sex at your age is not healthy. There are a lot of fun things you can do sexually that do not include actual penetration. At the very least, look around this forum for more information about sex before trying it again, and don’t do it drunk.

[Brandye]

Please read the thread Am I Ready. It deals a bit with physical, emotional and social readiness. They come at different times for humans.

[stuart1993]

i have checked the ther post replys but i am worried for my girlfriends health, will she be ok from the bleeding she endured

[dancingdoc2]

I should have welcomed you to the SI101 Board and its Forums in my earlier reply. I hope you enjoy participating. Please begin by looking at the Index and reading the other threads in the Sex101 Info Forums found at the top of the main screen.

The bleeding is most likely the result of perforating her Hymen. This is a membrane that partially covers the entrance to the vagina. It used to be that a girl was considered a "virgin" if the Hymen was intact. Nowadays and in Western societies where girls are far more active physically, the Hymen can erode away by the time a girl reaches her early to mid teens. This does not always happen so when a finger probes or a penis pushes against the membrane it will usually tear and as a result, bleed. It will heal itself in several days like any minor wound.

I overlooked the fact that you did indeed use a condom. You are to be commended for being responsible; however, your partner(s) should at the very least use a spermicide in addition. I suggest that if and when you ever do have intercourse that you spread some lubricant over the outside. Even though the girl may be wet, she may not be wet where she needs to be unless or until the mucus is spread around. By making your condom slippery, penetration should be easier and more comfortable.

Going back to what I said earlier, I understand about natural curiosity and wanting to know what intercourse feels like; however, I rather doubt that the two of you are emotionally ready, especially her. Here is a link to the article Brandye asked you (especially her) to read.

Here is another article for your consideration:

I'm Ready for SEX! (or am I?) I really want to do it.

More questions?

[Brandye]

Women should have gyn exams before becoming sexually active. Your g/f is 13; I doubt that she has seen the doctor. Therefore, whether or no the bleeding is abnormal, it is time for her to see a doctor. At that age, some women are simply not flexible and developed enough to comfortably admit a penis.

[lustforlove]

I was only a year older when i lost my virginity, and i didnt have an experience like that. Would that be because my body was more developed and mature? or does it just effect people in different ways?

[EvilEvilKitten]

I would say that "too young" depends upon your specifics. Generally speaking, Brandye is right but individuals will vary from this rule. If you have to ask "am I too young?", then yes, you are too young.

When contemplating doing something new, always take the time to study up the basics beforehand.