i hve never orgasmed through sex

[tarryn1]

ive been having sex for about three to four years now n i have only ever come through oral sex or masterbating? i can get close to orgasm wen im on top but the pleasure just stays the same. like, it doesnt go past that pleasure point of 'almost there'. and then i have to stop cuz then i need to wee..i get really angry at myself. can u please help..

[demonbuttercup]

Hay dios mio!

Start Here

[dancingdoc2]

Welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy your participation.

> i have only ever come through oral sex or masterbating? i can get close to orgasm wen im on top but the pleasure just stays the same. like, it doesnt go past that pleasure point of 'almost there'. and then i have to stop cuz then i need to wee..i get really angry at myself. can u please help..

Mother nature seems to have played a cruel trick on the female of the species. First, she has given you the ability to often experience mature orgasms earlier in life than males, yet has not given you the sexual drive to learn how as is the case with boys. Girls/women usually learn about masturbation for themselves much later in life if at all. Doing so is much more of a concerted conscious effort than it is for the male of the species. Second, in both cases, male and female, even though Mother Nature has given us the ability after puberty, each of us is left "hanging" because she has not "connected the dots" meaning that while we have the ability, the pathways and connections between the millions of sensitive nerve endings in the skin and the pleasure center of the brain along the autonomic nervous system have not been established. The fix is to practice. Boys are driven to do this as a matter of course right out of puberty. Girls generally lack the drive (read: hormone levels) that cause you to seek to establish these connections and then to experience orgasms in order to reduce stress and/or for the simple pleasure of it all.

It is great that you have bridged this gap in evolution and can have and enjoy orgasms. The third so called trick Mother Nature has played on the female of the species is to design your genitalia in such a way that the pieces-parts do not come into constant ongoing contact with the male body sufficient to stimulate the nerves during intercourse. From the male perspective, this seems like a pretty cruel trick, however, as Brandye points out, an orgasm is "irrelevant to nature while the man's is necessary to propogate the species. Orgasm/ejaculation is almost automatic in the male but not in the female. We must actually learn." In addition: "One of the beauties of being a woman is that we can fully enjoy sex without ever reaching orgasm."

How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?

Now, encourage your guy to use one of these positions, or, take it upon yourself to; have him stimulate you before and/or after intercourse if it is your wish, and, lastly, during intercourse. Give him feedback on how you are responding to his caresses and for what you may need--now!

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

[EvilEvilKitten]

See a sex therapist ASAP!

[Brandye]

One-quarter of all women never reach orgasm. About half require additional stimulation to penetration and thrusting. That means only about a quarter of us reach orgasm through "the act."

I am in the middle group; you may be, too. Count your blessings. And see all the goodies Demon has laid out for you that you missed before asking.