Problems in the Bedroom

[Ducy]

Okay so....

First off Id like to say....I finally finished from sex...and just sex. I did need a little stroking to get me hard, but i finished in about 15 minutes....which is record time for me the shortest time ever yes its sad that i would be happy for it only taking 15 minutes, but i usually take close to 45 minutes.

anyways on to the problem. So tonight was pretty great, we just let our hormones fly and next thing i knew we were on top of the table at the school near my house. it still isnt that mind blowing event that EEK said it would be, but pretty good. The only problem i had was that my girlfriend finished incredibly fast and she tried to relax and ride through her sensitivity after she came, but she had to stop right as i started to finish, so it wasnt as good as it could have been. what can we do so that she can enjoy or at least get rid of this sensitivity? I mean she did put up with it for almost 15 minutes, but like i want her to be able to actually enjoy it afterwards.

Secondly for some reason when im going to have sex i cant seem to get hard, like usually my girlfriend just makes out with me and im up and ready....but if i think or no sex will happen i cant get it uup unless she rubs and tugs. WHY? why cant i get hard as easily as when we just do foreplay?

[sera300]

Are you talking about intercourse?
If so:
Question #1: if she has had an orgasm some women are super-sensitive but penetration should not be an issue if you stay away from her clitoris and focus on penetration touching on the g-spot or the posterior fornix. Then many times [if able] she may be capable of another orgasm.

#2: This is mostly mind over matter. Focus on what will happen rather then not happening. There are times where foreplay & kissing leads to being rock hard, and stroking you [much like you do when you masturbate] are required. It's conditioning from negative responses in the past.

Lastly; it takes time to be perfect! Lots of practice will get you where you need to go and you will be able to be in sync with her. Give it time and have fun! Should title this "issues" on the table, lol!

[EvilEvilKitten]

Complete, non-texting language sentences please.

You're not getting as hard because you are still worrying about finishing and sex not being the mind-blowing event I know it can be. Relax on both counts because your anxiety is preventing both from happening.

To help her relax and ride through the period of sensitivity, return to body worship avoiding her clitoris while distracting her by, as sera said, caressing he G-Spot or posterior fornix. I usually recommend waiting to go for the posterior fornix until after she's had two orgasms.

As for you, she should be doing body worship on you to increase both your arousal and your sensitivity. There are additional methods but they would require your subjugation.

[Ducy]

The sensitivity is even through just penetration. i was careful to avoid her clit. I even changed positions to makes sure i wouldnt touch it. (I stood while she was laying down) But after a while she just couldnt take it anymore.

[demonbuttercup]

Usually for me the penetration only starts to hurt if we've been going awhile and I start to dry out...even after I've came... seems the level of natural lube starts to drop fast.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Demon - just add more lubricant! Easy peasy!

[Max]

Yo ducy you say you can usuaally last like 45 minutes.. i wish i could whats your secrets how do yu last so long ive got to work on that i hate not being able to last long

[Ducy]

well if you were me, I would love to last only 5 minutes...my girl is done in under 2 minutes...4 if i go really really slow...so like yeah....

My secret though...I stressed so much about comin to fast that on my first time I didnt finish. My girlfriend somehow managed to put up with me for over an hour....just relax, let nature take its course...i focus more upon her than myself, so i think that helps a bit since im trying to pay attention to what she wants...also i had a lot of sensitivity issues with latex...switched it up to polyurethane and i was like

[Max]

yeah so ur advice is just to relax and dont think about me so much ? and i can see what you mean because sometimes when we do have sex its like right when i get in her i go a few strokes n then jus cant help but go maybe im thinkin about my self to much idk i just cant control when i go i get very excited so i jus go

[Ducy]

exactly...focus on her, if you finish fast big deal, practice makes perfect . youll get the hang of it. I mean im still learning the ropes and my stamina is lowering a bit.

Look at it this way though, would you rather do foreplay for a 2 hours, then have sex for 2 minutes and both you and her cum? or would you rather it be a case of she is pleased but you dont actually finsih while having sex? Thats how it was for me the first like 2 maybe 3 times. I actually would have to pull out and she would finish me with oral because i just couldnt seem to finish.

Now I try to pay a bit more attention to myself and I have managed to cum through intercourse (although it still is difficult because she becomes too sensitive at times)