Dirtry Talking

[heretosatisfy]

Here's the deal, me and my girlfriend have been together for over a year now and she is very "clean" in bed. She will tell me if something feels good and moan but she won't ever say anything dirty. She refuses to use words like pussy, cunt, clit, cock, etc. I think it would be a real turnon to hear her say stuff like that because one time she said something that just sent me through the roof (it wasn't that dirty but from here it was). I've asked her to talk dirty while in the middle of stuff and she just kinda stops whatever we're doing and says she really doesn't want to even though I told her it would turn me on alot. I don't like having her do stuff she doesn't want to and say it's ok. I was wondering if anyone has any ideas as to how to increase her dirty talking, thanks.

[demonbuttercup]

im the same way.
i feel embarrassed and/or dumb for saying stuff like that. like im trying to be sexy or be a slut or a porn star and im not. i don't understand why guys find that such a turn on
what my b/f did to try to get me to open up was he would tease me, and like just start to penetrate me and then stop and ask me what did i want? well to get it i had to say it (explicitly lol) out loud.
same w/ oral, he'd start, then say what do you want?
i don't like saying c*nt either... just seems nasty lol.
i still don't say THAT much in bed. talking seems to distract me
the extent of my dirty talk is if im close ill say f*ck me baby lol
thats about it. lol
whatever you do, don't pressure her and make her feel bad for not wanting to. i know to you it seems like a simple request but to her its something she just doesn't want to do.

[heretosatisfy]

That's really good advice. I don't need it to be happy and I can go without it so I'll just let it be. Maybe down the road she'll change but I'll let her not make her.

[Rawbob]

I agree with Deamonbuttercup...and I"M A GUY! hahaah

Its different for everyone, but i don't want my sex to sound like a cheap porno - by that i mean the "forced" banter.

If the words come out naturally because of whats going on, thats one thing...but if it sounds hokey, i really don't like it.

My partner LOVES that talk, and it's taken me years to get him to understand that i'm more turned on by saying what he's FEELING then what he THINKS he should be saying!

[LittleFury]

Well, some girls are like that. I can swear like a sailor then I'm around friends, however in bed I have real hard time talking dirty. You could always try telling her, outside of the bedroom that dirty talk turns you on, and then you're in the bedroom, start dirty talking to her, that mgiht loosen her up. And give it time.

[IMaChic]

yeah, whatever you do, try to make it sound natural and move in gradually. try talking a little dirty to her and see how she likes it and it might just encourage her to try it out herself.
i don't know how some people don't like to talk dirty, to me thats like 50% of what gets me aroused. recently, my bf just started talking really dirty when we're having sex or when i'm doing stuff to him and it turns me on soo much its incredible. also i love teasing him and talking dirty to him and telling him every little thing i'm going to do to him or what i want before i do it and he loves it. sex would be so dull w/out dirty talk.
don't get me wrong though, i don't like all that rough "f*** me you slut, yeah you like that bitch?" talk that just completely turns me off... just normal casual dirty talk is nice. lol.

[oberon]

Can't really add much to what has been said, other than just give her time and let her know that whenever she's comfortable is okay with you. You don't want her to feel inadequate. Just try to get her to start small and work up.

[shyshy]

hi, my name speaks for itself. I'm having the same problem. My b/f wants me to talk dirty to him and I don't want to sound stupid. He wants to hear over the phone sometimes when we talk during the day, and I feel like I'm put on the spot and I know what ever I say will probably sound like a fake porn line. I don't know what to do. Over the phone it just does not sound right!

[uncreativename]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (shyshy @ Jan. 20 2005,08:19)]hi, my name speaks for itself. *I'm having the same problem. *My b/f wants me to talk dirty to him and I don't want to sound stupid. *He wants to hear over the phone sometimes when we talk during the day, and I feel like I'm put on the spot and I know what ever I say will probably sound like a fake porn line. *I don't know what to do. *Over the phone it just does not sound right!

totally shy shy...my guy keeps trying to make me explain stuff and it just embarrasses me...i just dont feel comfortable tlking over the phone about stuff like that! dont feel pressured...only do it if u wnt to - u gotta be in the mood!

uncreativename

[finewine]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (uncreativename @ Feb. 24 2005,13:24)]

totally shy shy...my guy keeps trying to make me explain stuff and it just embarrasses me...i just dont feel comfortable tlking over the phone about stuff like that! dont feel pressured...only do it if u wnt to - u gotta be in the mood!

uncreativename

It is always awkward at first to try anything new..
Look for the motivation behind him wanting you to talk that way...
What is hot is not the words, but what the words convey... a deep intense sexiness and desire...
You have that on the phone and it doesn't matter what you are saying. Learn to be descriptive to paint mental pictures in his mind.

be true to who you are... and reflect that in your words.

Find words that you are comfortable with that convey the same deep intense sexiness and desire... make up your own words... be creative and imaginative use your English lit classes, personify, metaphores, similes... and then they become your own special words just between you and not shared with every porn site...making them all the more sexy and desirable, taboo and secret.
once comfortable with your own words you can sprinkle a few of the "dirty" words in for emphasis of intensity...

as for talking on the phone... look for a win/win for both of you... how about you practice talking back and forth via this board. LOL there are lots of examples of that here.

Try some of the dirty talk ad libs. They are fun... how about starting an actual ad lib on a thread?
anyone?