I've never had an orgasm during sex

[Jessica_L]

I'm an 18 yr old female, my boyfriend and I started having sex 4 months ago, and it was the first time for both of us. I'm disapointed because I thought I'd enjoy it more, but we have lots of problems in that department. I've never been able to orgasm while we've had sex, even though he's willing to wait as long as I need. After 20 minutes it usually starts hurting so I just let him cum.

He's about average size, but for some reason he often has problems putting it in or keeping it in. We tried doggy style a couple times but he had a lot of trouble being able to put it in right. If he pulls out too far he usually falls out, even though he's not small and I'm pretty tight. Does anyone have suggestions on how to help us? We do it about once a week so I'm not sure if things should be going better by now. * *TIA

One possible reason could be that he's never watched porn, and maybe he doesn't have some of the basic techniques down.

[LadyOfLucidDepths]

Hmm ok first your newbies... it takes a bit to get used to.. and the fumbling it gets less and less over time, but wills till occasionally happen. Well, to enjoy it more... i duno one reason... you might not be orgasming.. is because most women dont just from sex alone.. like does he play with your clit at all? do you guys change your positions? that could be a factor..a nd the whole falling out during doggie.. well that will happen.. depending usally.. on how far he pulls out, so maybe next time tell him not to pull out as far... and another thing that can cause problems is your OWN body angle.

usally the reason it starts hurting.. is because you arent getting into themood becuse you are focusing on.. the orgasm.. or.. so i've found with myself. so you could bring lube in..and when there is more lube it feels better... i think for both parties??? but.. the watching porn thing.. i doubt that.. its just you guys as a couple maybe havent had enough time.. or whatever to really.. "work" on your.. motions.. as a whole? like... just basically learn eachothers bodies.. and that too can cause.. some.. of the not knowing..


jamie

[oberon]

Oh, Lord. *Don't let him learn from porn. *They are much more interested in visual angles than the fact the two people having sex are enjoying it. *If you want to learn from video then try some of the sexual position tapes- the instructional type.

And Lady is right. *Take time to learn your bodies and talk to each other about what feels good. *Have him show you how he likes to be touch and you do the same for him. That will help more than anything.

[Brandye]

Too much we do not know. Are you orgasmic while masturbating? While he stimulates you other ways? Are you truly aroused or just a bit?

It sounds like part of your problem can be addressed with lubrication and the rest by getting used to it. Roughly 50% of women never or rarely have an orgasm as a result of penile thrusting alone. The angles or whatever just are not quite right. About a quarter never have an orgasm at all. Keep things in perspective.