ahhh help

[dirty69angel]

hiiii... i'm 16 years old first of all my bf and I "tried" to have sex last week, what I mean by tried is that we couldn't get it in there, it was slipping, it wasn't even half way in and it was hurting really bad so i had to tell him to stop. this was my first time of course, i was never fingered before but he did a bit. even though i was really nervous i wanted it in but it just wouldnt go. after that, i bled for a few days, i have no idea why? but my question is, why couldnt it go in and it was so painful everytime we tried. i'm so scared because i read all this stuff on the internet how if it doesnt go in then you have this disorder or whatever called "Vaginismus". ahhh i'm so confused... or am i too tight? i've never worn tampons before. but after that time, i tried because i thought i didnt have a hole, and it went in with no problem, i also tried fingering myself with just one finger and it went in, then with 2 and it went in also. ahh i'm so clueless about this. somebody please help and reasurre me that i don't have Vaginismus. thanks!!!

[thetease13]

see, i had the same problem.
he went in fine, but about halfway down his shaft, he hit a "barrier" so to speak.

first off, don't panic. it's your first time. first time doesn't always go like you want it to. you're tight and haven't gotten used to being stretched by something like a penis before.
if you're small, like me, you're gonna have a bit more of a problem. i myself have somewhat a short canal and i believe my guy was hitting my cervix. having a somewhat short canal is not all too uncommon in small women.
i, like you, also bled for a couple days afterwards. this can be caused by cervix bleeding (not exactly a good thing) or he may have just accidentally tore something. as long as you're not bleeding buckets of blood, it should stop after a couple days or so. my bleeding was never heavy and it would come and then it would go.

but back to the point, don't panic. the more you make yourself believe you have this, the more you're gonna worry.
i suggest reading this topic that i made asking a question about my somewhat short canal.

and, finally, if after a few times of having sex and you're still having this problem, i suggest going to a gyno. they're really the only one that can tell you what you do and do not have.

[dirty69angel]

thanks for the info...

um... how do i stretch myself down there so that way i could be ready next? i'm thinking of getting a vibrator but don't you have to be over 18 to get one though? or are there any other objects i can use?

[thetease13]

more or less it just takes time for you to be able to get used to things like that.
i don't think you have to be 18 to buy something like a vibrator or a dildo, but hey, i could be wrong. i don't own one myself so I honestly don't know.
but again, i think more or less it just takes time. a dildo or a vibrator might help some though.

[LadyOfLucidDepths]

What the Problem might have been was you were not "lubricated enough"... that was a problem for me even after i've had sex.. like sometimes it hurts.. other times its *thumbs up*.. so maybe also bring some lube into the situation.

Jamie

[kevin83]

No pain no game as they say.

Me and my current girlfriend had to try about 3 times before we actually got it working. What it took was LOTS and LOTS of foreplay. Then when she was lubricated enough and ready to accept me, it worked fine. She said it was slightly painful, but ovbiously for some girls it will be, it's just something that has to be done.

kev.

[oberon]

You are suppose to be at least eighteen to go into any adult type shop, but I'm not sure how strictly that is enforced. If you have a way, you might try mail order.